To be considering reporting this ridiculous woman for harassment?

[Fbdj]

This is all a bit of a tawdry tale but...

Earlier this year my partner started seeing another woman (N) behind my back. It was in essence an affair although he says (and she admits) that he told her it was only ever about casual sex. They met on a casual sex type hook up site.

Anyway, it all came out because N got hold of my social media details, and messaged me, then spent hours giving me a highly embellished version of the truth.

Partner and I split up. Her hope, as I understand it, was they would get together as a proper couple, start going on actual dates rather than just meeting for sex. That didn't happen and as I understand it they saw each other no more frequently than when he and I were together.

A few months ago he contacted me, and we started talking, just as friends. This kicked her off and she messaged me again with a load of vitriol. From that point contact between them reduced further.

More recently, after a lot of talking, I felt maybe we could try again, very slowly, just dating, no sex etc. But I said that he would have to cut N off completely (by this point he was only seeing her intermittently, purely for sex. She was also shagging a number of other men and had been throughout. She told me she hoped it would make him jealous and he would ask her to stop. He didn't).

Anyway, him telling her that he wouldn't speak to her again has set her off like a rocket. She sent me 4 messages yesterday on SM (before I blocked her). Before blocking I did message her back and clearly tell her not to contact me again.

Today she has sent 2 more messages from accounts she has created purely to message me, content is her generally being spiteful and vindictive. I will block her again but am I within my rights to report her for harassment if (as seems inevitable) she contacts me again from a new account tomorrow?

Yes I think you can. I’d probably think twice about getting back with the bloke though!

Sorry, I can't believe you got back with him. If he had cut all contact with her after and showed remorse but he was still fucking her when you discussed getting back together?!

It's a real shitshow by the sounds of it. If I were you I would cut my losses and walk away from the sorry mess. Do you trust him not to cheat on you again with her or anybody else?

I wouldn't.
Mainly because you can't trust your DP further than you can throw him. So every time she starts up again, you know they are shagging again.

I’d block both of them tbf. Why would u entertain talking to him again when he was meeting up with another woman for sex while he was with you.
Oh and get yourself an STD check if you haven’t already.

He's not worth the hassle. Get rid of him and she'll disappear too.

That wouldn't be unreasonable

However the tone of your message comes across as blaming her for everything, like she is the one that pursued him and he struggled to turn her down because it was 'just sex' and hes only a poor man who struggles to say no. I know this isn't what you asked but no way would I consider getting back with him. He was still sleeping with her even knowing how much it hurt you when you found out

You have absolutely no idea what he is telling her, or how he is presenting their relationship. You know he is a liar and a cheat why on earth would you get back together with him? I think you need to very careful consider what you are being told is a pack of lies, her too. He wants to have you both at his beck and call and is loving the attention .

Honestly I think you both need to raise the bar. This guys a cheating scum bag, what has he got you're both willing to go there. A golden cock?

Don’t get back with him he will just invite another crazy into your life.

You're both being strung on and lied to by the same bloke. A bloke who, after his hook-up broke up his relationship out if jealousy kept sleeping with her regardless of her or your feelings.
Keep blocking the poor woman but I'd think very carefully about spending time with anyone who has demonstrated so clearly his lack of care or respect for you

Omg. You have much bigger problems than this woman, although I can understand the need to focus on her rather than the real issues.

Actually I feel really sorry for her. She might be behaving badly, but this bloke has treated her appallingly. She is a human being, not a receptacle for him to ejaculate into. He may have told her that it was just sex but at some point it obviously became clear that she was more emotionally invested than that. He should have stopped there instead of continuing to use her, knowing the pain it was causing. He sounds absolutely vile and a misogynistic pig.

Report her to the police?

Seems a bit much for a few social media messages.

A much quicker and easier way would be to dump the useless article of a man, block him and leave them both to it.

YABU for not blocking them both and moving on with your life. What's this guy got? A gold cock?

Do you really want to get back with someone who behaves this way? He's hedged his bets by carrying on with her - he knows she wants more than just hook ups and she's shown her obsessiveness and that she'll direct her upset at you. He hasn't gone to any effort from what I can see, it was a speculative message to see if you were receptive.

It's no excuse for harassing you and you'd be well within your rights to report it. But how can he really be worth it? I'd block him and move on. If she continues then I'd report.

How on earth can you get back with someone who did that to you?

He shagged someone behind your back then when you broke up he continued going with her.

Please have respect for yourself, surely you are worth more than an absolute w*nker like him!

Why in fuck would you take him back? Never mind her. She'll disappear from your life as soon as he does. Win win.

Why do you want to be even on nodding acquaintance terms with someone who treats you like he does?

You deserve much, much better than him, he's a (insert very derogatory word of choice)

Have an STD check and go and find your self-respect, you seem to have lost it somewhere.

We're not together. However neither are they. She freely admits he always told her it was just sex. And she was continuing to shag other (married) blokes too, so she's certainly not some poor innocent who's been taken advantage of.

I hear what you say about him, anď the decision I've made hasn't been taken lightly.

Seems her behavior is getting out of control and becoming very stalkerish.
You don’t have to officially press charges in order to let the police know what is going on.

Secondly, please don’t give your ex another chance. He was horrible to you. You deserve better, give yourself time to move on and find someone new. The harsh truth is that you can absolutely never trust him again.

I've always said that most women aren't crazy, they get turned crazy! And guess who by? People like your partner/ex partner. Using her as some sort of sex doll to please his needs and probably telling her a pack of lies and bullshit all the while.

It'll be you next OP. Tell him to sling his hook and she'll disappear from your life as well

She's hurt and lashing out. Because he's made her promises that he hasn't kept.

Ring any bells??

Are you really that desperate, OP?

Which SM platform is she messaging you on?

On Facebook you can set up your account so that you only receive messages from friends, so even if she does create new profiles (weird!) she won't be able to message you.

But yes I would report her, and ditch the bloke.

Goodness me, block the pair of them. He cheated on you fuck that.

A few months ago he contacted me, and we started talking, just as friends

why the fuck would you want to even be friends with a guy who treated you so badly and disrespectfully? Have a bit of respect for yourself atleast and put the the blame on the right person ....hint it isn't the woman who was supposed to stay faithful to you

He was still seeing her "just for sex" and you want to give it another go with this peach of a man? Good luck.