Friend told her daughter I was a lesbian!

[Flyingbytheseatofmyknickers15]

Hey lovelies!

Slightly difficult conversation. I have a friend who I met through a DV group which our children were a part of. We had a girls night one evening and I offered her to stay over. I laughed and said we would cosy up in my bed, with the tv and some wine after the pub. She declined.

Afterwards, she told her daughter she thinks I'm gay because of saying she could stay in my bed. Her daughter told my daughter that her mum thinks I'm gay. 🙄🙄🙄

I'm very much a dance in yer knickers with your mates, kinda woman.

I cut ties with her, because I feel that actually, as humans, we should be solid and supportive towards one another and it caused issues with my daughter who asked me about it. My daughter has been very aggressive towards me at times following the separation between me and her dad. This situation exacerbated it.

My friend from the DV group has recently contacted me. Should I cut her off or be honest and explain? We had fun as friends but aren't very close. Should I make the effort?

I think you should tell her that she’s upset you, and your daughter, and ask her what she has to say about it.

You invited her to cosy up in your bed and drink wine?

Are you?

if so that would be factual.

Tell her really firmly her assumptions have caused problems between you and her daughter and rather than gossiping about your sexual orientation she should have been woman enough to ask you if you were gay first. Then cut her off.

I don't understand why you invited her into your bed to drink wine. Normally you socialising in your living room, and would only do that sort of thing with someone you've known a very long time. Plus why would you dance in your knickers with your mates?

How old are you please?

Yeah, I'd have taken that as a come on too tbh. She shouldn't have told her daughter though.

Cosy up in your bed and dance in your knickers? No ta. I'd decline that and think maybe you were coming on to me

I don’t think it’s ever occurred to my mates & me to cosy up in bed & dance in our knickers. Maybe we’re missing something.

Being gay is fine, if someone thought I was gay that’s fine. You said you weren’t close but suggested cosying up in bed with her, but then see your ass when she thinks you fancy her??? She must think it’s ok to be gay as she’s still contacting you, so sounds like a nice enough person. Tell her you’re not gay... I’m sure she’ll be FINE. With the utmost respect I think you need to deal with your aggressive daughter... the friendship or not is a side issue

Loads of female friends share a bed, no big deal. Definitely say something to her as she’s hurt you and caused a problem with your DD. How old are the girls?

I think to someone who you haven’t known for a long time this would sound like a more than friends suggestion. However it’s something I would do with friends I grew up with

Eh? Why are you so offended at being called a lesbian? So what if you are or aren't? Seriously who cares anymore it's 2019.

You're pissed off at your DD sounds like.

It doesn't sound like you know each other very well op, like you're not friends for years who regularly stay with each other.

I think In that sort of scenario of a budding friendship if the other party asked me if I wanted to spend the night and get into their bed and drink wine I'd be a bit unsure too, it's a bit full on. It's not something you really suggest.

I'd just text her and say god, I'm sorry, I heard you think I'm gay, I was just being friendly but am straight. (Assuming you are).

If someone I wasn't particularly close to invited me to cosy up in their bed and drink wine then yeh I would be suspicious about their motives!

It does sound like a come on.

I wouldn't make a huge deal out of her telling her daughter she thinks you're gay. If your daughter asks you you can just say you aren't. It isn't an insult.

Not something I’d suggest unless I knew the person very well...

Or fancied them. and even then

I mean, that does rather sound like an invitation, tbh.

Wow!

I certainly didn't ask her to dance in our knickers! 😂😂😂😂 I mean that as I feel comfortable around women because there's no sexual intention! 😂😂😂😂

We went to the pub and I simply said we could cosy up, watch films and have more wine before then crashing out!

It did affect my daughter more than me, hence me asking! To me, it was just a normal girls night?!

Nothing wrong in sharing a bed with a friend but if you aren't close then it's odd so she assumed it was a come on . Wrong of her to tell her daughter but the real issue is your daughter and her being aggressive not your friend thinking you are gay .

Well you asked her to get in bed, cosy up and drink wine if that’s not a come on I don’t know what is......

You cut ties because she thought you were gay? Is being gay an insult or something?

😂😂 I mean that as I feel comfortable around women because there's no sexual intention! 😂😂😂😂

No, because you’re not a lesbian. But your chum also is not psychic.

I'd tell her that her gossiping about your assumed sexuality caused a rift between you and your daughter and that her interpretation of your suggested activity as a come on has shown you that you're two very different people who probably don't have much in common.

To me it is NOT a normal girls night, I can honestly say I have never got in bed with a women and drunk wine ever!