To think this comment from DP was disgusting?

[DarkGreenMini]

I've been with DP for 6 years. Slowly over the years he has been showing a different side to him, that he is racist. For the first year he never said or did anything racist then slowly after that he would make racist comments that I would call him out on and he'd apologise saying it's just bad humour.
It has become clear though that he has very racist views, learned from his family (who I don't see often so didn't know this about them).
We have had arguments over his views and comments in the past and he has said that it's just how he was brought up but that he won't make comments any more.
What makes no sense is my parents were immigrants so I don't understand why he would even have gotten involved with me if he is so against immigrants.
Anyway, today I told him that our DS had made a friend who doesn't speak much English but that they get on so well even though DS is speech delayed.
DP sarcastically said 'great' and muttered something about needing to see the parents 'first'. He then said to DS 'where's your foreign friend?'
I instantly said to him not to say anything like that to DS as he doesn't need to learn racist behaviour from him, to which he replied 'It's people like you who have made this country shit' and gave me the most nasty look.
I'm utterly disgusted by his comment and his racism.
He obviously hid this very well at the start of our relationship but this last year he's been like a different person with his attitude to anyone from a different country.
I'm honestly considering ending our relationship because I can't tolerate racism.

Personally ending a relationship because of that would wouldn’t happen for me. I could overlook it. However if it’s something you you are willing to break up your family over then fair enough.

I think you will be the odd one out greatnorthwoods. This would be a marriage breaker for me.

I would just put up with it. It’s not that big a deal

Really??

I can't believe people are saying they would put up with this!!

I couldn't overlook this kind of attitude. If my partner started to show any kind of racism, I would be seriously questioning what kind of man he was and if he was the kind of man that I wanted to spend my life with.

Racism isn't a big deal?! it bloody should be!

I couldn't share my life with a man like that either OP, nor would I want him raising children to have the same bigoted views

YANBU
'It's people like you who have made this country shit'
After that, I’d have to imagine what the rest of my life would look like, what else will he blame you for. How is he going to influence DS.
I’d be moving as far away as possible.

Doesnt he realise by saying that (showing his real feelings) he is belittling not only you but his child as well?

I'm honestly considering ending our relationship because I can't tolerate racism.

You absolutely, absolutely should. What a vile prick.

'It's people like you who have made this country shit' and gave me the most nasty look.

Does he mean because you're accepting of everyone, or because you come from 'forriners'? Actually, it doesn't even matter, please don't let your son be raised around these kinds of views.

It's knobheads like him that have actually made this country shit.

The relationship would be over for me. The comment he directed at you was outrageous.

Deal breaker for me. The relationship would be immediately over, as I couldn't be with someone who holds such abhorrent views.

He would be out the door before he finished the sentence. I could never share my life with a bastard.

Where’s your foreign friend is n’t bad, sounds like a clumsy attempt at humour rather than racism.

Wow. Surprised and disappointed by the comments so far. Someone thinking immigrants have "turned the country to shit" and passing that attitude onto their child isn't a big deal?

That would fly in the face of everything I thought I knew about my DP - i.e. him being kind, open-minded and big-hearted. Sorry you're finding this out OP.

I suppose it boils down to whether or not you're prepared to allow him to teach your child to be racist or not.

I would just put up with it. It’s not that big a deal

Are you for real? Please say you're being sarcastic??

Ignore my post I had nt seen the it’s people like you part.

Fucking hell this place has changed!

OP couldn’t love, never mind respect someone who held racist views so it would be relationship over for me. The fact you have a child with him makes it even more pertinent that you end it. The less time the child spends around his attitudes the better.

This would be an absolute deal breaker for me. I wouldn't cope with someone who disliked their child's friend just for being foreign. And he will only get worse.

@northernparent68 if you're willing to disregard the entire context of the comment, sure... But why would you do that?

I can't think of any better reason to separate than to break the cycle of poor parenting before it affects your own child.

I would react the same way as you tbh.

Seriously @Greatnorthwoods? You could overlook racism? You could overlook those sort of toxic attitudes around your dc?

Absolute dealbreaker for me. If my dp said things like that he would disgust me and I would find it impossible to be around him.

@PennyNotSoWise no I’m not being sarcastic. The OP may not agree but everyone has different views don’t they? I wouldn’t break up my home and my family just because of a few comments

I couldn't be with someone who thinks like this. I have cut my adult step son out of my life due to his extreme views. I am not going to waste time on someone like that.