Not to switch my day off for colleague?

[StartupRepair]

My colleague lives a couple of hours flight from her DC who are 18 and 21. They live with their dad and she flies to see them every couple of months. She is due to go to see them this weekend. She has just heard that her DD has a fracture in her foot and is feeling down. Colleague would like to stay away for a week to spend more time with her DD. However colleague is booked in to do a piece of work on one of the days. Currently only she or I know how to deliver this and the date cannot be changed. (It is a 1 day course with 15 people booked in). She has asked me to cover for her.
I work 4 days and this is my day off. I have been flexible with this day on many occasions and have swapped it to help out others. I am really trying to hold the line on no longer swapping it around. On the actual day my colleague wants cover I have booked lunch with 2 dear friend s. It has literally taken us 6 months to find a day that we could all meet.
I am a bit of a reliable workhorse type and my colleague has a bit of a chaotic life. I am sympathetic to her wanting to spend time with her DD but I am also learning to be protective of my day off.
AIBU not to swap?

2 days and 200 posts. Does it not occur to people things might have moved on?

Clearly not.

OP, I hope your lunch is/will be good with your friends. And it's good that you're standing up for yourself now. Be more selective with swaps in future. One suggestion I have, is maybe arrange a swap with colleague and go off to do something that you want to do. You can be vague, call it health related if needs be, but call in a favour or two to ensure people stop taking the piss.

YANBU

It’s a fractured foot, nothing too serious. So she does not need to be there, even though she might like to be. You have plans and they are not going to be easy to rearrange from what you’ve said. Maintaining friendships is important, as is having time to rest and relax.

Therefore, it seems reasonable to simply say you can’t swap.

I have Friday's off, which people often want me to swap to give them a long weekend I've had to nip this in the bud and say no

I know that's your working arrangement, but the knock on effect of that in places where only X number of people can be off on the same day is that other people are rarely/never allowed to take a Friday off, which isn't very fair is it?

Unless it’s going to be a massively boozy lunch in another town I think I’d swap but still do the lunch

*I know that's your working arrangement, but the knock on effect of that in places where only X number of people can be off on the same day is that other people are rarely/never allowed to take a Friday off, which isn't very fair is it?

No, but that's a management problem so management need to sort it out, rather than expect people who are less well paid than them to enable their shit management.

Lulu49 the OP is launching with 2 friends, and this has taken a long time to arrange.

As she has previously swapped, I dont see why she should this time, especially as the colleague has acknowledged OP has swapped but has not yet reciprocated.

YANBU I used to work a shift with a Monday off people would ask if I would swap days with them and I usually obliged if I had nothing arranged myself but invariably when I needed a different day my colleagues always seemed to be busy so I learned the hard way that sometimes you just need to start saying no. When I did say no they started to question why so I told them that after being fair with them and changing days when they needed and the act not being reciprocated they only had themselves to blame, I wasn't exactly popular but I did enjoy those long weekends.

Love that this thread still has a life. I'm feeling really good for saying no on this occasion. There's something in this boundaries effect.

I have Friday's off, which people often want me to swap to give them a long weekend I've had to nip this in the bud and say no

People are more likely to say no to you if you ever needed to swap. Saying yes occasionally makes life easier for everyone.
Personally I would have swapped. When I had an accident, all I wanted was my mum and I was 23.

Lilypoppet didn't say anything to suggest she could swap though, did she? Perhaps she has eg caring commitments on the other days. I'm part time and I can usually swap with enough notice, but it's not always possible. May require a support network or flexible childcare provider, which not everyone has.