To think that no one, absolutely no one can understand my devastation.....

[Toooldtobearsed2]

Crap subject, I know. But we currently have a touring caravan which is sited in a beautiful part of the country.
We go there for, perhaps, 6 weeks in total throughout the year, but split into 2 or 3 ight stays iyswim.
DH has complained ad nauseum about not being able to sleep, getting tight chested ( hay fever) and being uncomfortable.
I am not a bitch. If he hates it, it simply does not work. So, we are selling said van. Tomorrow, 3 sets of potential buyers are viewing. We will get a sale - it is a huge bargain.
I cannot stop crying. This is my happy place, where I can truly relax, walk for miles, eat delicious food, flump.
It is the right thing to do. I know that. But it is breaking my heart.
First world problems and all that. Just wanted to spread my misery😄

That’s really sad and rubbish. 😔 could you not keep it just for you? Sorry you are having to sell. 💐

Sorry - I tried to preview this message, but got an 'access is denied' message. Having had a wine (or7), it might not make much sense😁
I blame MNHQ personally.

Why are you husband's "needs" the only one's that matter? You love it there. Why can't you go on your own?

If its your happy place why can't you keep it for you to visit? You could look at renting it to others to make some money back and have holidays elsewhere together.

Do you really need to sell it? Why cant you go on your own/with kids if you have them/with friends?

Ummm, move it to a place with less of what sets off his hay fever?
Has he taken good anti/histamines and a puffer?
Is it some component inside the van?
Would he enjoy it if it didn’t make him wheeze and sneeze?

I know. And now the slating starts.
I would go on my own, would be happy to. But DH would be sad. I know, honestly, how that sounds, but it is the only way of putting it. We enjoy each others company and he has tried all ways to make this work - matress toppers, piriton, you name it, he has tried it.
It feel as though I would be punishing him for not making the grade if you understand. And I would never do that. This whole thing was my idea, and I love it. He does not.

Jesus. Keep the caravan. Go without him. Marriage is about compromises but in this case there's no need to give up something you love just because he doesn't love it too. If I had a little getaway I could slope off to for the odd weekend here and there my husband would have to pry the keys out of my cold dead hands before I'd give it up.

And now the slating starts.

Slating? Where?

Can't be have a new man shed and you keep the van?
Motorbike for him?
I have a secret place I go and the stress relief is immeasurab le.

I have bad allergies. Medicine like piriton does not work. I get fexophenadine prescribes from the doctor and it is a miracle cure. Maybe ask your GP and try that before selling your caravan?

If you love it so much, keep it.

I don't get the need for misery

DO NOT sell it - keep it for yourself & go on your own. You don't have to go as often as currently but a few weekends a year would surely do you the world of good & your DH would be ok on his own for such short periods of time.

Tell your DH to get proper strength hayfever medication from the doctor.

@52user1480880826 sorry for making a weird post. I am just sad about losing something I love.
I will crawl back under my stone now, in an effort to not upset you.
FFS, this is just a 'Iam pissed off and want to share my misery' post.

Yes. I could go one my own, DH has suggested that. Strangely though, i enjoy spending time with my partner..... it is not hust hay fever, he struggles to sleep well. He needs a hip replacement ( yep, drip field, but this was meant to be about me being sad than him being an old fart), so struggles to not only sleep, but sit comfortably.

This was a daft post. I have just been answering several enquiries about buying the van and it got to me.

Thanks anyway

Surely you can pop off for a weekend by yourself/with kids/with friends without him "getting sad"? He's a grown arse man! You're his wife, you're not seen into the lining of his coat. It's fine to enjoy each other's company and do most things together. It is also fine to have separate, non-meshing interests, to be apart, and miss each other, but do the things that make you (singular) happy, and then reunite and enjoy each others company again.

A relation where this isn't possible without "sadness" (sulking?) sounds co-dependent and a bit controlling to me. If he cared about you he'd be encouraging you to enjoy your caravan without him, not watching you be devastated.

Move it somewhere else? A site by the sea with fresh breezes?

Just get him to get his hip sorted out! It will change everything

You sound pretty decided on selling it. If that’s the case and the various suggestions above aren’t feasible for you, put all your energies into finding your new happy place. The caravan was brilliant for you for a certain period of your life - believe that there will be something equally brilliant for the next period - and enjoy exploring what/ where that might be.

Invest in a really good mattress topper and some antihistamines, and keep the van!

You say you enjoy spending time with your partner... Does that mean you never so anything without each other?? You don't have to go there for 6 weeks a year... Just when you fancy. Presumably he has friends/hobbies/ a life of his own that you don't always join in with??

I totally get it. My MIL has just had to do the same thing and is heart broken. She also doesn’t want to go alone to caravan so no point in keeping it.

Don't sell it yet. Have a go for a while at you using it by yourself & see how it works out. Your DH might find he doesn't get as sad as he thought he would, that he quite likes a little alone time etc. Remember to always bring him back a stick of rock.

and maybe more vino
I understand and with time you will find another way to relax, get away, zone out.