To be upset by this comment

[Justanotherusernamemydear]

Sat at work the joy of shift work and a male colleague of mine was making idle chit chat, and asked me my height. I said 5”6 why??
His reply? - “the average female is like, 5”4 isn’t it? So you’re a proper giant. When I look at you I’m shocked at how tall you are, you’re like a giant”. he’s 5”10 and obviously taller than me, I don’t fully understand why he’s decided to say that to me? He’s normally really nice, and I suspect that he has a little crush (would never go anywhere as I’m in a long term relationship and don’t see him like that). He’s a 29 year old man, is this normal?
It’s actually really upset me. I’ve laughed it off and gone a bit quiet, but it’s really played on my insecurities. I’ve always felt really tall, even DP has asked me not to wear heels as it makes him feel short, so I don’t wear heels anymore...
AIBU to be upset at this comment? Am I a “giant”? it’s made me feel like a great big lumbering oaf, and made me feel shit about myself.

A man who used to flirt with me once told me I have ‘massive hands’ although I don’t, they are medium sized hands. I wear medium size gloves, a large iPhone would be too big for me to use properly. I don’t know why he thought my hands were massive. It really pissed me off

I don’t know why he thought my hands were massive

I think it might have been a (wishful) preemptive strike on his part.

This sort of thing upset my sister a lot who was 5ft7 at age 12. She’s still the same height but 35 now. She was skinny and a bit lanky and towered over her friends, so I can understand why this would bother you when younger. Your DP is using his own insecurities to put you down. Your height and shoe size is so totally average I can only assume he’s sensitive about his own to say anything at all. And he’s being horrible in case that wasn’t clear!

@Butchyrestingface

I suspect he was too! I was so annoyed I measured them 😂

I'm 5"10 and haven't heard comments like that since I was at school even then they were all by boys who felt intimidated/insignificant in comparison to me. Men are weird about height, I wouldn't even waste your time thinking about it tbh. At 5"6 you're a perfectly nice height and it wouldn't even occur to me to think of you as tall never mind giant. He's being weird.

Also want to add that if you want to wear heels, wear them. Your dp is dragging you into his insecurities rather than dealing with them. My dp is 5"6, as mentioned I'm 5"10, never has he had a problem with me wearing heels, like most men he thinks they look good. Before I met him I wasn't that into heels and that's not changed so I don't wear them that often, but if I wanted to, I bloody would!

I'm 5'7 and feel pretty average, I see lots of people taller than me.
I think at 5'10 perhaps he feels like a bit of a short arse so is putting you down to try and make himself feel better. He sounds like a total twat.

@PookieDo

A man used to flirt with me and kept saying I had MASSIVE hands!

Why do (some) men think that it's funny or cute to try and 'chat up' a woman they fancy, by insulting her? Do they really think a woman will be attracted to, and interested in a man who insults her? Are they THAT THICK?

This happened to me many years ago (pre DH!) I had several boys (YES BOYS) when I was around 16 to 21, who took the piss out of my 'wobbly arse,' big hips, and chubby face. One even said (when I was 17-18,) 'you've got a lot of spots on your face haven't you?'

I think I had about 4 spots on my face, and I was on my period. And at 5 ft 5 and a half, I was also no more than 9 to 9 and a half stone, and a size 12 (would be a size 8 in today's sizing...)

One bloke even had an obsession with taking the piss out of my 'big nose.' (It's not big and never HAS been!)

Turns out, every single one of them fancied me/wanted to ask me out. Utterly bizarre and stupid to think they could 'woo' a girl, by fucking insulting her looks and her weight.

Not sure if they were just uber-thick, or if it was negging.

I'm just shy of 5'7 and I do feel tall, but not unreasonably. I don't think I stand out on a crowd!

That guy either has a complex about his height (v common for guys of 5'10, imo) OR he's 'negging' you. Which as you mention you think he likes you, is quite likely! They can say the strangest things when negging. I once had a man in a nightclub try it on me with 'you look like Angelina Jolie, but you know it don't you'. I look NOTHING like Angelina Jolie, no matter how drunk you might be, I can only think it was a pre prepared negging tactic!

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negging

Yes I agree with @bluegirlgreen often dickish men seem to think putting down women they fancy will get them somewhere... probably as they have some form of inferiority complex so think that by bringing you down you might then consider them as a prospective partner when they later pay you a real compliment. Like you'd be so grateful of their eventual approval you'd roll over and jump into the sack with them. Absolutely pathetic specimens. Your colleague is a twat.