To be upset by this comment

[Justanotherusernamemydear]

Sat at work the joy of shift work and a male colleague of mine was making idle chit chat, and asked me my height. I said 5”6 why??
His reply? - “the average female is like, 5”4 isn’t it? So you’re a proper giant. When I look at you I’m shocked at how tall you are, you’re like a giant”. he’s 5”10 and obviously taller than me, I don’t fully understand why he’s decided to say that to me? He’s normally really nice, and I suspect that he has a little crush (would never go anywhere as I’m in a long term relationship and don’t see him like that). He’s a 29 year old man, is this normal?
It’s actually really upset me. I’ve laughed it off and gone a bit quiet, but it’s really played on my insecurities. I’ve always felt really tall, even DP has asked me not to wear heels as it makes him feel short, so I don’t wear heels anymore...
AIBU to be upset at this comment? Am I a “giant”? it’s made me feel like a great big lumbering oaf, and made me feel shit about myself.

At 5’ 10’” he’s not that tall. perhaps about average?

But he’s acting as if he’s a small man with small man problems.

Ignore him.

What a weird thing for him to say. I would think your height is pretty average! Sounds like he is insecure about his height? I would hit back with ‘how tall are you? 5”10? That’s small for a man no? You are proper teeny!’ Dont let it bother you!

5'5-5'6 is average. Your colleague is a dick. I'm under 5ft and would love to be your height if it makes you feel any better 😁

The co-workers comment is so odd that I wonder if that's exactly what he said, or if it was more of a throwaway comment or said in a sarcastic tone, and your insecurities have made you take it in a different way?

It just makes zero sense for someone to call a person who is shorter than them a giant. As I said below, my husband is a shortie at 5ft4 and he wouldn't consider a 5ft6 woman a giant, or unusual at all. It makes a lot more sense that a minor comment by the co-worker has triggered insecurities caused by the partner.

I’m 5.10.

You’re not giant. Beautiful women tend to be leggy and tall - even taller than you. Your colleague however is tiny. Perhaps he’s expressing his own insecurity about his height by criticising yours?

Tell him not to be so insecure! This is about him, not you.

Haha what a prick I'm 5ft 10 and I rarely get comments like that.Think he was either clumsily flirting or trying to make you feel shit

Beautiful women tend to be leggy and tall

🙄🙄

Your colleague however is tiny.

🙄🙄

“Beautiful women tend to be leggy and tall.”

Some leggy, tall women are beautiful but there’s no tendency to it. Beautiful women come in all forms. The only ‘tendency’ is that beautiful people tend to be beautiful.

I realise we’re are told that leggy and tall is the ideal...but we all know that’s bollocks so we don’t play along with it. Do we?

Unless this OP lives in Lilliput, it’s hard to imagine her being met with a barage of comments from all and sundry on her extremely unremarkable height. The partner needs to be put in his place.

5ft6 is my height too and is very average! I don't consider myself tall - your colleague is weird, or maybe it was some (very) clumsy attempt at flirting???? My sister is 5ft7, all the women in my DH's family are 5ft9. You have nothing to worry about, your height is totally unremarkable.

5 ft 6 is tall for a woman in my family but the we are all short at around 5ft3. My sister is 5ft 6 and to me she is tall. It's all relative, sounds like he was trying to flirt but clumsily so. Dont give it headspace and if you want to wear heels go for it. I get told I shouldn't wear flats as my husband is a foot taller he doesn't care and quite frankly I will wear what I want.

Thanks all for the comments! I think I needed some sense talked into me. I agree that it’s a silly thing to get worked up over, if he’d commented on my hand size or whatever I’d have thought he was odd and my hands were fine. It just struck a nerve as I have been made to feel bad that I’m not a 5’1 delicate flower
He wasn’t sarcastic when he said it, it sounded like a genuine observation. He’s also made weird comments before, such as “you always look sad when you’re looking at your screen. It’s like your mouth turns downwards”... can’t help RBF?! Seems like he spends half of his shift looking at me and trying to pick fault. It’s frustrating as I go to work to earn a living, not be scrutinised.
Again, there’s nothing wrong with tall ladies in the slightest. It’s just the way he said it as if it was a terrible thing for a woman to be taller than average. And yes I agree that DP has most likely work me down with his “oh, I’m only joking don’t take it so seriously” nasty comments.

You aren’t that tall.

I don’t get why you would be so upset by this

He sounds slightly idiotic but you have also overreacted finding this so upsetting...

I’m an inch taller than you and it is in no way tall.

5' 6" is the taller end of average, at best, and a size 6 shoe is also bog standard. In fact, I would a lot of women of your height are a 7, so a 6 is on the small side of average. In other words, you are a normal size.

But it wouldn't matter how tall/short you were, nor the size of your feet, he is still being very rude. Someone has taught this twerp that the way to show girls (not women, girls) that you like them, is to be unpleasant to them. If he knew, understood or ever maturely interracted with women, he would know the difference.

He has hit a sensitive spot, but as you know there's nothing wrong with being tall or short, or have big or small feet.

He, ironically, is a massive arse. In a way that is definitely wrong.

I think you are sensitive about a colleague's bored jibes because the person who is supposed to have your back is telling you that you are physically wrong. Both men are in the wrong, but one is being stupid and the other really mean.

Have you sat your partner down and seriously asked him why he is being mean?

@Mileysmiley

..because they then end up giving birth to big babies which can cause complications...

Not always. I'm 6'2, DH is 6'4. DS was a perfectly normal 7lb 9 with an uncomplicated birth 🤷‍♀️

He's a pillock. 5 ft 6 is not tall! Nope, not even for a woman.

I’m 5’1.. I’m not a delicate flower either 😂, I can wrestle with my bodybuilding 5’9 dp. He doesn’t give a shit, I think he finds it handy.. our cupboards have a third shelf I can’t reach or see what’s beyond the front row.. that’s his shelf, I’m not eyeballing the ominous biscuits I promise.

I had an ex who insisted I must be 5’5 cause he definitely wasn’t any less than 5’6.. he was 5’2 if he was bloody lucky. But wouldn’t accept being “short” some guys are a bit precious about being big macho men. And ironically the really tall ones, friend is 7ft hates it, he declares he felt like a walking lamp post when we were camping years ago 😂..

@Justanotherusernamemydear what a load of old shit. As if 5 foot 6 is a giant. Sounds like he has a hang-up about HIS height! He may be 5 ft 10, but he probably has male relatives who are over 6 foot 2, so he is classed as the short-arse in the family.

I have known this happen in families. Several sets of male cousins (maybe 8 or 9 men in total,) and they are all 6 foot 2 to 6 foot 4, except one, who is 5 ft 10, and he is mocked for being 'short.'

That's probably what's happening here. It sounds like he is projecting his issues onto you.

I am 5 ft 5 and a half, and my DD (in her 20s,) is 5 ft 7. Never ever ever have either of us been considered tall.

Weirdly, my SIL is 5 ft 2 and a half (so only 1 to 1.5 inches below the average height for females,) and yet she is constantly the butt of 'short jokes.' Mostly because my brother and all 3 of their sons (now adults,) are 5 ft 11 to 6 ft 2. And her sister and sister's husband are 5 ft 7 and a half, and 5 ft 10, and their 2 adult kids (one son and one daughter,) are 6 ft 1 and 5 ft 8... So they class her as a shortarse.

My nan and grandad (on my father's side) were 5 ft 1 and 5 ft 5, and all 6 of their kids were 5 ft 2 to 5 ft 7. (2 girls and 4 boys.) Not ONE of them was considered short, because it was a 'not-very-tall' family.)

Some people just need something to have a pop at. If it wasn't your height, it would be your weight, or your hair colour, or something. Ignore this dickhead.

And yeah, the average height for a woman is around 5 ft 3 to 5 ft 4, but that doesn't make 5 ft 6 'tall.' Daft as fuck.

I know many women who are 5 ft 5 to 5 ft 9. Many. (Especially women under 40, they are almost always at LEAST 5 ft 6!)

I know more women in this height range than women under 5 ft 3!

I'm 5ft 7 and my sons call me shorty as they're both well over 6 ft

5'6? Most women I know are at least that height? What a weird thing to say.
I wouldn't be surprised if he fancied you and was just trying to get your attention in a really, childish, messed up way.

I am 5'3 and people constantly say how small I am. Yet I am only 3 inches shorter than you.

I’m surprised that at 5ft 6”, which is clearly not tall, that you are upset by this. God help us tall women if you feel you can’t wear heels and you feel really tall. That’s like a size 10 women complaining that she feels massive. He sounds strange and rude and you seem a little odd too in your thinking.