To tell my mum not to cook for MIL?

[Bettyboopityboop]

Ok so a bit of background:

My family and DH family live in different countries. My family live in Canada and DH family is in South Africa. My mum's family is originally from Turkey. DHs family is just English.

Anyways my family is buying DH's family plane tickets to come to the UK then to come to with us to visit them.

My MIL is a bit scared of "weird" food. My mum makes brilliant Turkish dishes that include a lot of meat and rice. My DH loves my mum's cooking, so I'm sure she will make even more Turkish food. My mum wants to cook a huge feast for the day we land because she is so excited but MIL has already said she doesn't want food that has fat in it and she doesn't like anything if it's not what she's used to. I'm a bit worried about her reaction to foreign food. She generally eats only English style recipes.

AIBU to tell my mum not to cook all this food, even if it might hurt her feelings? I doubt it will be touched by MIL and this might make my mum upset anyway.

Just warn your mum that MIL will only have chicken and chips but you’re all looking forward to her dishes?

I'd just tell your dm that mil is a fussy eater and unlikely to eat any of it. Why should everyone else go without what sounds like a lovely meal from your dm? Show mil where the toaster is and enjoy.

Everyone else will love it. MIL surely can eat something plain?

Can’t you just warn your Mum that MIL is a bit fussy and ask her to cook a simple, plain dish for MIL alongside the delicious Turkish food that no doubt everybody else will enjoy? If your parents are generous to buy your PIL plane tickets I’m sure they’re understanding people and won’t be offended by MIL’s fussy eating..

Let her cook, but warn her that MIL is fussy so she’s prepared.

don’t expect her to make anything special for MIL though!

Can I come instead of your MIL? This meal sounds like my idea of heaven 😍😍😍

Explain to your mum and she can still make the nice stuff (If she wants to) and everyone but MIL will enjoy it.

Tell MIL the food wont be too her taste and suggest she brings a ready meal for herself.

Just English. Doesn't like weird food. What a twat.

If everyone else will enjoy it then let your mum go ahead. I have no patience for fussy eaters. It’s just plain rude.

There will surely be something she will eat? Plain rice?!

I wouldn’t say anything to your mum personally, let her cook her food. MIL will have to make do with something plain - cheese, bread, fruit or whatever.

Plain bread, butter, plain (undressed) salad, plain cold roast chicken, job done. MIL may gave gallstones or similar if she’s asked for low fat food. Rest of you can tuck in to the feast.

Your mum sounds like such a lovely person. If you think it will be eaten by all but your MIL, maybe just a warning to your mother that she's picky?

No. You tell your Mum to crack on and cook her lovely food for you and DH.

MIL has two choices. She either grows the fuck up and eats like an adult, or doesn't come. Easy.

your mum can cook for me anytime! Just tell your Mum that MIL is fussy and not to be offended by her. Thats all you can do

My MIL is exactly like this, very very fussy, pans about "foreign muck" when they are on holiday. Very very scared of putting on weight so won't eat carbs or anything with fat.

I would let your mum cook her (amazing sounding) dishes but warn her about MIL. Make MIL a simple chicken salad or similar.

I agree, let your mum cook a feast and just make sure there’s something plain for your MIL. It would be ridiculous to make everyone go without just because person doesn’t like ‘weird food.’

As an adult (on a free holiday) surely she could pass herself for one meal, and take a little rice without any drama

I would love to eat your mothers food, unfortunately cannot eat fatty food gallbladder problems, but I would not dream of asking you to forego your feast. I would be quite happy with toast, it is all about family being together.

Will they feel like eating a big meal when they land (from South Africa?) I know the time difference is minimal but I think it will be better when they have recovered from the travelling.

Your family have paid for two lots of flight for your in laws? Is that right? Not only that but your DM us also hosting and cooking a feast for everyone?

Wow your family sound so generous and lovely. Your DM must be a star!

Tell your Mum your MIL is a fussy eater, let her cook her feast and then point your MIL in the direction of a frying pan and some eggs.

No. It isn't your Mum's fault or anyone else's fault your MIL is a fussy eater. Let your Mum make the food the majority wants and MIL can do her own thing. I assume you know which stuff your MIL likes and have it to hand

Good point Mosaic, we were knackered after a flight like this, time zone changes, carby food on the journey. We would not have been up for a feast, rather a long shower and bed.

I love Turkish food, so would not be telling my DM not to cook all that lovely food. Surely someone can just prepare a simple dish they know DMIL will eat like an omelette, chicken salad or bangers and mash.

Just say to your mum that mil only eats plain food. Loads of people are like that-including lots of mumsnetters! Warn your mil that your mum will be cooking a feast but not to worry - there will be plain things available. Job done.