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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Does my wedding sound shit? Be honest

219 replies

inspiredfood · 01/08/2019 12:23

Hi all,

I just wanted to gather opinions on my wedding later this month. I didn't want a big do so went small and now it's getting closer, I'm scared people will think "well this is crap Hmm".

Basically, 19 guests in total. This is includes bride/groom and our child. Mainly family but also each of our best friends and their partners.

We are having the whole day/eve in a hotel.

We have a drinks reception following the ceremony, a three course meal, wedding cake, and pizza for later in the eve with drinks (all of this is in a private function room)

During the meal we have bottles of wine and beer paid for by us and a glass of fizz each for the toast. We have a small not exciting chocolate based favour for each guest. A gift for the b/g parents, best man and bridesmaid.

We don't have music entertainment as it seemed a bit over the top given the party size so we have arranged a playlist to be played over the speaker.

I'm worried guests will be bored?! Is there anything I can add? Am I missing anything?

OP posts:
slashlover · 01/08/2019 16:07

Have a game of Mr & Mrs! Always a good laugh

MY friend did something similar. She and her DH sat back to back on chairs in the middle of the dancefloor, each holding one of his shoes and one of hers. Guests were encouraged to write questions to be asked and the B&G held up the corresponding shoe. The questions ended up ranging from "Who said I love you first?" to "Who is the best kisser?" to "Who has the crazier family?". You could ask your friends to write some beforehand (there are lists online) and have someone trusted to weed out any dodgy ones.

CorBlimeyGovenor · 01/08/2019 16:14

I'm really not sure what more you could do. It sounds far from shit. Just like any other wedding. In fact, probably better than a bigger wedding with a DJ or band because you can control the music and the volume and be more flexible. Better to have this than a load of bored people sat around the edges of a room, being drowned out by loud (usually quite cheesy) music! Besides which, if there's only 19 of you, you can always have an impromptu game of charades or hide and seek 😉

Mitzicoco · 01/08/2019 16:21

Sounds a hell of a lot better than the weddings I've endured!! Congratulations!

Daddylonglegs1965 · 01/08/2019 16:24

I think it sounds really lovely and relaxed just perfect. I am sure you will all have a lovely day.
I do like the idea of everyone picking a favourite song for a playlist as suggested up thread.
As I once went to quite a large scale evening reception (the bride and groom had got married in Vegas a few weeks before) they had their own play list largely dominated by the brides choice of dull non uplifting music. It made me feel a little depressed and the night celebration never got going at all. I went to the toilet and overheard someone else saying something about what’s going on with the ‘slit your wrists music’ which summed her record choice up perfectly.

Owlbert · 01/08/2019 16:30

Sounds perfect to me! Have an amazing day! Flowers

EssexGurl · 01/08/2019 16:34

This was my wedding, just we had slightly more guests and we didn’t bother with pizza. Cake was available with tea / coffee if people wanted it as well as the bar. Not rubbish at all, but lovely and relaxed. We both had friends and family there and spent time after the meal actually talking to people and properly catching up.

Much better than my cousins wedding where me and my sister were relegated to the hairdressers table at the back, couldn’t see anything/hear the speeches etc and spoke to my cousin for precisely 2 minutes as she had so many guests to get round. Disco was deafening too so couldn’t chat even if we wanted to.

Wellandtrulyoutnumbered · 01/08/2019 16:52

Sounds very lovely. Perfect. Agree with some board games. Get a camera and memory book sent around.

apples24 · 01/08/2019 16:53

Sounds lovely OP! I definitely also like the evening pizza, nice chilled way to conclude! Enjoy the day

Gitfeatures · 01/08/2019 17:26

What time is the meal planned for? Just wondering if pizza is really necessary given the 3- course meal, cake and alcohol.
If some people want 'nibbles' could they not order from the main bar later in the evening?

NotStayingIn · 01/08/2019 18:05

It sounds lovely and definitely not crap! But for me I find it a bit too long. I don’t have a day & evenings worth of small chat in me. Aside from it lasting too long I think it sounds really good.

Robs20 · 01/08/2019 18:18

Sounds great! Perhaps think of some games to play (quiz is a great idea). Hope you have a lovely day.

theydontknowweknow · 01/08/2019 18:39

Sounds perfect OP, you're feeding and watering your guests and that's all people really mention after a wedding regardless of how much you've spent. I'd much rather go to one of your style weddings than a huge fancy one with a 5 figure tag!

Socksey · 01/08/2019 18:44

Sounds lovely.... and eminently sensible... definitely the way to go....
Have a lovely day and enjoy every moment 😁

soapona · 01/08/2019 18:47

Sounds fine.

OhTheShoes · 01/08/2019 19:02

Sounds like my wedding! We had 15 people and you're right, there is no point doing a disco! We had a playlist and people chatted/had a drink. It finished about 10pm and that was fine! Even weddings with discos tend to lose momentum about that time or 11ish. It will be fine!!

Thesuzle · 01/08/2019 19:07

I agree with Onlyfools
Cut the pizza, sit and have a cup of tea etc for the drivers after the meal, you don’t say the time of the sit down bit, you all might struggle for chitchat if you are together for hours and hours.
But very good luck and congratulations

tartanlass1 · 01/08/2019 19:10

It sounds lovely and non pretentious!

Enjoy every minute of it with those that matter.

user1471449295 · 01/08/2019 19:13

Doesn’t sound shit at all. A nice small wedding, you’ve made sure everyone is catered for. There are many things that make a shit wedding and none of those things are in yours. Congratulations, enjoy your day

Billythecat · 01/08/2019 19:14

Sounds like a lovely wedding, I'm sure you and your guests will have a great time Smile

LollyBmummy3 · 01/08/2019 19:36

It sounds lovely, my only addition if I were you would be to invite a few evening guests to help you celebrate. The ideal time would be just in time for pizza and snacks. My cousin had a similar style wedding, it was wonderful and laid back and intimate. However with no music I felt it was a little odd. Ask the hotel if you can bring phone/iPod and speakers for back ground music. Or perhaps they’ll have a sound system already in the room. Congrats and enjoy! 🎉🍾

likeafishneedsabike · 01/08/2019 19:37

Sounds lovely. Have a great day Flowers

likeafishneedsabike · 01/08/2019 19:37

Wedding flowers, not sympathy flowers!

LollyBmummy3 · 01/08/2019 19:39

I meant to add, invite another 10 people max (5 couples) this might help the conversation flow more easily. 🍀

TheRLodger · 01/08/2019 19:44

Sounds lovely op. Have a great which I’m sure it will be based on what you’ve said. And congratulations x

Madge2012 · 01/08/2019 19:54

Sounds lovely, really nice, intimate and chilled. Have a great day. Pizza sounds great for the evening food btw! X