To ask you how the actual fuck to deal with this??

[TayoTheLittleBus]

Wits. End.

My two year old (just turned two) flipped herself out of her cot last night and was quite frankly fortunate not to break her neck. Soooo today the side has come off.

She will not stay the fuck in her bed. I keep returning her. Over and over. No eye contact etc. It’s now a game to her. Laughing and sneaking about.

I am now on the floor beside her bed and I just keep gently pushing her back down when she sits up. But I am already in a mess with my four year old as she won’t sleep without one of us lying beside her (a different thread altogether) and I am absolutely fucking determined that this will not be happening with DD2.

Please. Help.

I haven’t read the entire thread so apologies if someone has already suggested this, but have you tried putting to bed earlier? I know it is counter intuitive, but I’m a night owl and my DD can be the same way. I found bedtime such a battle for months and months when she was little that I started putting her to bed really early (around 6) or about an hour earlier than was usual. I know it sounds mad - and It was a bit of a palaver getting into a routine that allowed this (it is tricky if you’re working, I know). And she did sometimes wake briefly in the night, but would always go straight back with a cuddle and then woke up by herself at 6-7am. I found it was worth the trade off (esp as a single parent) because once I’d had a few hours to myself in the evening I was in such a better place to deal with any night time waking, but after a full on day at work and dinner/bedtime i really needed a break (ie. to do all the chores!)

Dog crate?

That IS a joke btw (although I have been tempted with our maniac 3 yo) and I back up everyone saying make the room safe, stick a stair gate in the doorway and leave her to it!

Instead of putting them to bed an hour later put them to bed an hour earlier. They don’t nap and they sound chronically sleep deprived. Kids who seem wired are usually tired. Putting them to bed earlier will work.

My daughter became adept at climbing out of her cot around her 2nd birthday, so to minimise potential for injury I took the sides off and it turned in to a toddler bed.

For reasons that remain unclear she too a disliking to this new arrangment and would not stay in her bed and would climb down and sleep on the floor. For the first few nights I would scoop her up once asleep and put her in bed. But she would wake at one point or another in the night and get back on to the floor.

I then get her a big girls bed with lovely comfy memory foam mattress and Peppa Pig duvet cover. We managed about 2 nights in this before the floor gained its appeal once more.

Given she wasn't waking until around 07:00, and rarely waking in the night, I thought I'd leave her to it and sooner or later she'd realised the bed was the better option.

8 months later this day has not yet arrived and she has slept on the floor for almost every day so far this year!

I had the same with my 2 year old when we had to do it. Keep going and being stern and the novelty will ware off soon cx

We bought a double floor bed. She’ll never need another bed, and meant I didn’t have to worry about her falling out of bed. Also space for me and friends/family when sleeping over (we also had a spare double mattress going). I got sick of getting a bad back from sleeping on the bars of her bed guard after I would fall asleep putting her to bed. She now sleeps alone and has a collection of books and quiet toys for early rises.

@weaningwoes, I haven't advocated tying a toddler to a bed. I would not do this myself.

My comment on your accusation of abuse based on a thought born of desperation, with no indication that this would be carried out, still stands.
I don't think it's helpful to be judgemental toward people who are at their wits end because of lack of sleep, who decide to try something out of desperation. These parents are facing a crisis and there is no indication that they are abusive in their day to day dealings with their toddlers.
Thinking is one thing and carrying out is another entirely.

There are plenty of things MNers and the general population do with babies and small children that wouldn't be ok with older people in a nursing home. For instance, feeding mashed leftovers is a widespread and harmless practice. By the same token, sitting in a TV room for hours watching daytime tv is something most parents would hesitate to let their children do but it's standard practice for many nursing homes.

For babies and toddlers, it's apparently widespread and perfectly acceptable, to judge from threads I have posted on (though I wouldn't agree) to hiss 'Don't make it difficult' and to yank a squirming baby or toddler back into place when changing a nappy.

Name calling, using names like 'little poop', is another acceptable habit (not to me).

@CatteStreet nooooo!

Never put children in your bed unless they are sick! She already has a 4 year old that won't sleep on it's own!

Jeepers.

It doesn't matter if they don't want to be alone, bed time is bed time and from 2yrs onwards they are old enough to understand the concept of bedtime and routine.

Children need routine, sleep and boundaries not wandering around all flipping night suiting themselves: parents wanting time to rest, to see their DP and god forbid, sleep themselves are not the work of the devil... it is allowed you know?

OP: what the others said. Mattress on the floor, child proof and stair gate and when you do go up just say "good girl, time for bed" and leave.

Build a routine to wind down (don't tire them out, it has the opposite effect).

• dinner
• bath
• cbeebies time for bed
• bed with short story

My DD2 was a nightmare but after 2 weeks if the above she eventually got into her routine, she was good for 2 weeks then tried it on and when she realised she wasn't going to get anywhere she towed the line.

Good luck.

@mathanxiety

*I haven't advocated tying a toddler to a bed. I would not do this myself.

My comment on your accusation of abuse based on a thought born of desperation, with no indication that this would be carried out, still stands.*

Then I wasn't talking to you, was I? I was talking to the PP who said, in terms, that they tied their toddler into their bed. I was calling them abusive. No-one else. And I reserve the right to judge the shit out of them because they are abusive, and to judge the OP if she were to do likewise.

Feeding either babies or the elderly mashed food is not abusive, and sometimes necessary. Leving a child or an elderly perosn to watch TV for large parts of the day is not abusive, and sometimes necessary. I am talking about the PP who admitted (boasted rather) to tying their toddler into bed and recommending that the OP do the same. Your pompous pontificating about anything and everything else is really bizarre.

Mattress on the floor and stair gates at the bedroom door, and at the top of the stairs. She managed to vault into the gap between her cot and a stone fireplace, wearing a sleeping bag that all my friends told me meant she could never climb...

She is 19 now and I can't get her out of bed...

I must be old fashioned - I can't believe that someone suggested she sleeps in your bed! She's got her own bed, she needs to learn to sleep in it! Parents need their own bed to not be full of their DC! Anyway, I agree with the gate on the door/safe bedroom and ignore treatment. Good luck OP - you might be in for a few tough nights but she will learn to settle

If I only have one bit of advice it is so not put her in your bed, I repeat do not put her in your bed!! It really is the worst thing you can ever do and you will live to regret it!

@BowStreetRunner

"The worst thing you could ever do"? Seriously? In a world where children get beaten and murdered (and, apparently, tied to their cot like dogs to a kennel) a bit of bedsharing is "the worst thing you for ever do"?

Fuck me the Japanese must be in serious trouble: time.com/3959168/how-to-parent-like-the-japanese-do/

I think @BowStreetStunner is just saying she'll get used to it and never want to leave

Then I wasn't talking to you, was I? I was talking to the PP who said, in terms, that they tied their toddler into their bed. I was calling them abusive. No-one else. And I reserve the right to judge the shit out of them because they are abusive, and to judge the OP if she were to do likewise.

Yeah you were talking to me. Your post was @ mathanxiety...

And as for pomposity - give it a break.

Some things are dangerous. Pointing out dangers is not pontificating.
Some criticism of parents using terms like 'abuse' is not warranted. Having a thought is not a crime. A little placing of oneself in the shoes of another goes a long way.