To ask you how the actual fuck to deal with this??

[TayoTheLittleBus]

Wits. End.

My two year old (just turned two) flipped herself out of her cot last night and was quite frankly fortunate not to break her neck. Soooo today the side has come off.

She will not stay the fuck in her bed. I keep returning her. Over and over. No eye contact etc. It’s now a game to her. Laughing and sneaking about.

I am now on the floor beside her bed and I just keep gently pushing her back down when she sits up. But I am already in a mess with my four year old as she won’t sleep without one of us lying beside her (a different thread altogether) and I am absolutely fucking determined that this will not be happening with DD2.

Please. Help.

If you could happily get up at 6am with them, why not do that. Wake them up at 6am, do it now whilst it is light at that time - it would be harder in the winter.

I'd go with this. And the earlier bedtime as a few pp have said. Not later - you're losing your evening already and if they're going to dick about, it's better it starts and finishes earlier.

Maybe add a cot lid for a cadge like effect

If you’re struggling to get them out of bed in the morning try an earlier bedtime. I know it’s counterintuitive when they’re not going to sleep, but mine used to get this glassy crazed look in their eyes with a half seven bedtime and play up no end. Overtired. At half six they’d doze straight off.

when they are in their teens they will sleep for hours & you will be complaining about that believe me!

No useful advice but feel your pain Tayo

My SN kid still wanders around his bedroom until very late every night. To be honest until they are tired you cannot physically restrain them or put them in every 5 minutes.

What I do:
Make sure there is a very good morning routine and no change at weekends. So that their body clock gets set.

Stair gate on the bedroom door.

Completely child proof the bedroom. Windows, items etc.

Install video type child monitor so you can see them. I have to put this outside the room looking in!

Pack away stuff in bedroom that isn’t great for them to do at night.

Read them a story. In bed, last thing.

Get a safe night light that attaches to the bed - it isn’t bright enough for out of bed activities but it is bright enough to sit in bed reading or drawing.

Give them books, drawing, or other calmer toys on their bed for them to do as they unwind. Whatever they like.

Tell them, you can either go to sleep at say 7.30pm, or you can go to sleep at 9.30pm but sit in bed from 8pm only doing a, b, c.

After bed, let them run around in the bedroom a bit. Don’t go up straight away, let them get a bit out of their system. Then go up, stand outside the gate to their bedroom and say, ‘you must go to bed, if you don’t I will switch the bed light off’. Ask them if they want a hug? Then do this only when they’ve got back into bed.

Expect them to get out bed a few times. Don’t stress. Don’t get cross. Just keep going up.

To be honest my kid needs to move around. He just does, until he falls asleep. So I do get him to go back in say about 3x every night. But I don’t stress, I don’t get cross.

Oh and yes definitely mattress on floor. You can get a low kids bed after he’s a bit older.

Oh and the monitor means DS can come to the stairgate on his doorway and call for me. Alleviates a lot of his anxiety knowing that I respond straight away if he calls. Sometimes just a hug.

So shut the door

Don’t shut the door though!

Earlier bedtime for sure. Even if it's 6.30. It will pay off. We have an excellent sleeper but if we miss the "sleep window" there's all hell to pay.

Ok I’m going to try the earlier bedtime and the stair gate. Thank you everyone I really appreciate the advice

When my son was two, he demanded that I sit beside him every night until he was asleep. It was exhausting and irritating, like being a hostage. One night I had serious tummy issues and had to go sit on the toilet-no way to avoid it. Called DH and asked him to sit with DS. I could hear him lose his temper "You get in that bed, and you go to sleep. You are a big boy! Your mother is not going to come in here, and you don't want me to come back in here" He lost it! When I opened the bathroom door, he was waiting and told me NOT to go to DS, that he was in his bed and to leave him alone. Every night after that, DS got ready for bed, kissed us goodnight and toddled off on his own!
It sounds awful, but it was stern and needed. Bedtime is for parents, not necessarily for children. You are allowed adult time, and probably need it for MH! BTW-the next child started out in her own bed and never, ever had issues.

You have my sympathies! I have some of the same tips but maybe a couple of new ones!
Dog gate not baby gate- they are a good 6 inches higher! And often same price!
Double mattress if you can afford it and have space not single- the nights when I did end up laying there at least I was bloody comfy!
Nothing in room except clothes and bed.
Good lighting (dark enough to sleep bright enough not to be scared)
Glow in dark stars on roof (count the stars) was a good game and got him to remain in bed a bit longer each time.
Star charts! And stickers for a good sleep!
Oh we also went double bubble and put second stair gate at top of stairs as well as at door- if they got over one we’d hear them before they figured out/ fell over the next! But then since DH fell down stairs and destroyed knee I’ve been paranoid!

Stop fighting, start ruling
Sit outside the bedroom door, when she comes out say no! And not nicely, say it like you mean it, like when she going to touch something hot! Pick her back up put her back into cot say goodnight, close door .repeat as many times as you need to. DO NOT sleep on the floor next to cot, they find comfort in that. Disconnect by saying goodnight and leaving room, close door.
Get hubby involved, same routine EXACTLY.then they (she) can’t win!
And yes, it will take a few nights but this does work
Good luck!!

@Fruitbatdancer same! Double gate. Love them such peace of mind.

Childproof the room. Floor bed is fine - I’ve just put DD in her “big girl bed” at nearly 3, she’s had a mattress on the floor since she was 18months.

Frankly, whether you want to stay with your kid when they fall asleep is down to you and how you want to do things. I often lie down with DD for a few minutes but don’t stay till she’s asleep. Some people cuddle their kids to sleep because it works quickly. Some don’t like to because their kids don’t sleep through if they do that.

Do give changes to bedtime a go. We had a nightmare when DD was nearly 2.5 if we missed “the window” as she’d get overtired. Tweaking nap time really made a difference to her (and us!)

wont work for everybody but when we put her cot matress in a cloth play tent on the bedroom floor, she loved going to bed. She also liked a sleeping bag.

I say an earlier bedtime! At 2 years old I would be starting the routine at 6.30 with the aim of lights out at 7pm. You need a routine though which signals bedtime so the start of it begins the wind down process- bath, milk, teeth and story- good night kisses and lights out! If you don’t have a routine start one now- but be patient- it takes time for it to become ingrained- give it 2-3 weeks!

At that age I had her in a sleeping bag and cut a hole in one corner and tied her in- she could stand up but not get her self out of the cot - she was furious for 3 nights and then gave in...

I bought this for my godson. He's 2.5 and started climbing out of his cot. This (put on back to front as he managed to undo the zip) works perfectly and he can't get out now.

Holy heck what was the matter with my son? He was in a coma the second I put him to bed. He's 40 now and still the same.

I had this problem with my son, I bought him a re big boy bed and let him pick some bedsheets he liked and he was so excited to sleep in it, your 2yo might be abit young for this though

We had to buy a full size single bed for DD when she was 17 months old, following my discovery of her launching herself over the side of the cotbed. I was really lucky to catch her - she's a wriggler, so used to sleep in those Gro-bag things. If I'd been 2 seconds later she'd have been on the floor.
We had to buy a proper single, as she was always a nightmare to get to sleep, & clearly bars weren't any use in keeping her in, so we decided to snuggle her to sleep, but in her bed. We'd then leave as soon as she was asleep. Much better than co-sleeping in our bed (standard single, DH built like a Viking so we really need a bigger one just to fit him in! Plus, both DD & DH are tremendous wigglers. And both naturally supplied with the heat of a volcano.) When DD still used to wander into our room in the night, more often than not, DH or I would defect to DD's bed before sunrise. I don't miss those days!

Do you think maybe she's going to bed too late? Mine couldn't sleep at that age if I let them get over-tired, then they'd be awake until 10pm. Try an earlier bedtime?