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Original poster

Need someones help..... bit personal

177 replies

Sjoe456 · 30/07/2019 11:27

So it's a long story.. ok bare with me.

Basically when I was single I slept with a guy on the 25th of may, a one night thing, I took the morning after pill 12 hours after it. So then on the 1st of june I woke up one morning and stood up and felt like a gush and it was dark red. I went and wiped and it was like dark red/pink for the first wipe then after that it was red/dark brown, I'm really sorry for the TMI but I even stood up from toilet and looked on floor and there was red droplets.. then I had to use tampons for 3 days so that was my last bleed and it was a dark brown dark red when using tampons. My period wasnt due until the 12th of june but I read online that the morning after pill can make it come early and even lighter. So.. on the 3rd of june then I got back together with my ex boyfriend (never thought would happen) and we blew caution to the wind and had unprotected sex about 10 times in the space of 4 days from the 3rd-7th of june then it was once everyday from the 7th. The only 2 days we didnt have sex later on was the 16th and 17th of June. So just to be on the safe side that I wasnt pregnant from the 25th of may guy I done clear blue preg tests on the 10th,14th and 18th of June and the one I done on the 18th of June was the weeks indicator and they all came back Negative.. so the very last test I done on the 18th of June would of been 3 weeks and 4 days after I slept with the one night guy. So also around the 14th of june I could of swore I was starting my period as I got little twinges in my ovaries and then around the 23rd of june I got sore boobs.. so then on the 26th of June I done a clear blue pregnancy test and i got my positive and it said pregnant 2-3 weeks.. then a few days later on the 29th of june I done another and it also said 2-3 weeks pregnant. Then on the 3rd of July I done another and it just changed to 3+. On that same day I went and cried to my doctor cause i wasnt sure how far along so i got an early scan and went and she tried to scan my belly and nothing.. then an internal was done and there was just a little sac.. and she said sorry i cant tell u an age (she tried to measure it) and she said come back in 2 weeks so I went on the 16th of july and she measured it and there was a heart beat on screen and she said you are 6 weeks and 1 day.. gestational age?? And it was tiny the baby was only like 0.33cm is she going from last period or is that how old the baby is from conception that confuses me alot.. but basically I want someone to help me as this is stressing me out so much .. when I went to my doctor and told her everything she said I would of got a positive on either the 14th of 18th for definite. And also if it was the one night guy the baby would of been bigger on the scan on the 3rd. Thank u to anyone who took the time to read this x

OP posts:
littlepaddypaws · 30/07/2019 11:39

sounds like it might be the ex p's child, really not sure, you'd only know for certain through dna at a later date.

NoImmediateDanger · 30/07/2019 11:42

Sounds like exPs

Original poster
Sjoe456 · 30/07/2019 11:42

Hi guys thanks when use say ex partners do use mean my now boyfriend? X

OP posts:
Pancakeflipper · 30/07/2019 11:45

I don't think any of us can give you a 100% answer. Sadly there's no way to know at the present time. Its not what you want to hear but exact dating at this stage is not day exact.

Original poster
Sjoe456 · 30/07/2019 11:47

Will I know more at my 12 week scan?? Its just my doctor told me I would of definitly got a positive 3 weeks and 4 days after the first guy..

OP posts:
MatildaTheCat · 30/07/2019 11:47

You conceived mid June.

The weeks include two weeks before conception as pregnancy is measured from the first day of you last period though obviously not everyone has a regular 28 day cycle.

When you have your 12 week scan the dates will be confirmed but this is not a pregnancy that was conceived in May.

Damntheman · 30/07/2019 11:48

Sounds like it's probably your boyfriend's to me too. But the only way to know for sure would be DNA testing when baby comes.

Grumpasaurus · 30/07/2019 11:50

You will know for sure at your 12 week scan but it should be your boyfriends. If you were negative at 3 weeks post sex with the ONS it will not be his.

Skittlenommer · 30/07/2019 11:52

You sound very reckless. You had unprotected sex with your ex but now on again boyfriend after having unprotected sex during a one night stand. Have you informed your boyfriend that you both need to be fully screened for STIs?

No judgement on the sex side of it, I’m all for getting it wherever and with whoever you want but to not use protection is insane!!!

I think the baby is your now BFs but question if you’d be responsible enough to be a parent when you can’t even think through contraception.

NuffingChora · 30/07/2019 11:52

Pregnancies ‘by dates’ are counted from 1st day of last period, by scan they are dated by the measurement that would correspond to the size of the foetus at the equivalent time. If you were dated at scan as 6+1 the likelihood is that your period would have been around 6 weeks previously - which would be around 3-4th if June (assuming your cycle length is around 28 days and you ovulate midcycle) - which corresponds with the bleed that you had (just means that perhaps your cycle is 30-31 days or so).

Highly unlikely that the baby has been fathered by your one night stand, given that tests were negative in June, and also given that the subsequent fertile period you had would be around the middle of June when you were back with your ex - particularly given that sperm hangs around for a few days.

The only way for full reassurance would of course be a DNA test - but this would obviously require consent of your now-partner. In your position I would be reassured by the dates I think. Good luck!

IsobelRae23 · 30/07/2019 11:52

Sounds like boyfriend, not ONS guy. Hopefully at your 12 week scan, you will be reassured. I can imagine how stressful it must be though.

Original poster
Sjoe456 · 30/07/2019 11:53

Thanks guys it would make sense to me .. as I done a pregnancy test on the 18th of june and it was the weeks indicator.. i think they are 99 percent chance of a positive after 10 days I read.. when I was gettin a scan she measured the baby so I thought it was she was measurin it from conception or do they always add on 2 weeks xxx

OP posts:
Original poster
Sjoe456 · 30/07/2019 11:58

To the previous poster called skittlenommer I appreciate u taking the time to read my post but it must be so great for you to be fucking perfect musnt it?? Yes the 25th of may guy shouldn't of happened but it has and I've already got checked for any STIs and I'm as clean as a fuckin whistle. Just because I slept with someone (that I know) might I add doesnt take away my ability to be a good mother it will be hard but I will give every drop of love I have to this baby. I've slept with about 6 people my whole life and I'm 24.

OP posts:
ticking · 30/07/2019 12:02

"I've already got checked for any STIs and I'm as clean as a fuckin whistle"

umm you can't know you are all clear until your second HIV test 3 months after 25th May.....so you aren't...

amiapropermum · 30/07/2019 12:06

An 'additional' two weeks is added on as pregnancy is dated from the first day of your last period, rather than the actual date of conception, so it sounds to me that you conceived mid June

Original poster
Sjoe456 · 30/07/2019 12:07

Do they test for HIV through pregnancy? I have midwife on 9th of august.

OP posts:
sneakypinky · 30/07/2019 12:09

I can't even. Hmm

Elliebellbell · 30/07/2019 12:12

My youngest dc is 18 and I got an HIV test with him (i worked with offenders at the time).

PurpleGlitter1983 · 30/07/2019 12:13

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purplelass · 30/07/2019 12:14

You should know more from the 12 week scan but a DNA test is the only way to be sure.

I hope your relationship with your on-off boyfriend is more stable than it sounds, I assume by saying we blew caution to the wind and had unprotected sex about 10 times in the space of 4 days from the 3rd-7th of june then it was once everyday from the 7th you were actually trying to conceive?

Orlandointhewilderness · 30/07/2019 12:15

Purpleglitter that is bang out of order. You have NO idea what this woman is like, you have no clue about her situation other than the fact she posted she had a ONS and got back with an XP. Both things have no impact on her ability to raise a child.

VenusTiger · 30/07/2019 12:18

OP @Skittlenommer is right. Truth hurts.
Look after yourself! Why can’t you use contraceptives? You’re a grown up aren’t you?

Elliebellbell · 30/07/2019 12:18

I think it's highly unlikely that your ons is the father, but all that unprotected sex is just asking for chaos.

I wish you well op but you sound like you get off on a big dramatic lifestyle, for the sake of your future child, rein in the drama.

ItsAllGoingToBeMagnificent · 30/07/2019 12:19

Sounds like you wanted a baby, knowing that level of detail about symptoms and dates of sex, who notes down the date of sex unless ttc? You were doing pregnancy tests checking if you were pregnant with 1 night guy yet still having unprotected sex with the other? I mean 1 time heat of the moment, a lot of people have been silly, but to then embark on a 3 week unprotected shagathon with someone else?! Madness.

Skittlenommer · 30/07/2019 12:23

@Sjoe456 no judgement on the number of people you’ve slept with. You can hop in and out of as many beds as you like.

My point was having unprotected sex with someone and then with someone else is reckless! And as @ticking correctly pointed out HIV tests aren’t considered fully clear until the 3 month mark. I am sure you’re fine but it’s reckless.

Do you and your boyfriend break up a lot? This baby is going to put a huge strain on the two of you and if you’re not already strong as a couple it doesn’t bode well for the future.