To ask what you actually can't do after having children?

[BinkyBaa]

I'd like to have children in the next few years but I'm a serial worrier/over planner. I see lots of vague statements get thrown around on here about things like holidays and hobbies not being possible anymore after children.
Obviously I know life is different forever after having DCs but aibu to ask is there really anything children stop you doing ever again entirely?

Bouncing on a trampoline with any degree of confidence. My pelvic floor is not what it was!!

Leaving the house alone on a whim. That's what it boils down to!

Having another vaginal birth 😬

Doing what you want the exact second you want to without checking that you have childcare/ have got the mountain of crap you need to take if you are taking dc with you.

Oh and peeing alone and lovely long relaxing baths during the day!

Pop to the shops at 7.30pm when DH is out.

Sleep in.

Um that’s about it?

Use the toilet alone, for a good many years.

Consider the food on your plate to be yours.

Put yourself first without considering how that affects them. Probably for the rest of your life.

Tried to go to a wedding today with my dd (4m old). Ended up leaving before the meal, as it was too noisy for her. She kept falling asleep then people (randomers!) kept touching her and waking her up

Getting drunk & lying in until midday the next day.

Sneezing without pissing

Sleep

Leave the house. Takes an hour, minimum.

Oh and there's nothing quite like having a baby to reveal the ingrained sexism in society.

But that’s just me and my bad luck.

Doing things spontaneously is the main thing. You cant as easily just go off and decide to stay out somewhere or change plans on a whim. And I think you really start to think about others before your own needs.

I’m in baby stage - I feel unable to afford holidays / nights away extravagances but can still stretch to the odd nice day out. Childcare is expensive. My partner is away so I am looking after baby on my own a lot, which means I am struggling to go running or the gym (or a bath). It will get easier though definitely! And once we get some hours free with childcare I might be able to have a short break with baby

It’s worth it so far for me, and the best thing I was told is that there’s never really a perfect time. If you’re stable financially with some support it’s much easier but you make it work.

Well I don't see me being able to ENJOY sitting in the sun with nice cocktail by pool at least until our son is at that stage where he's old enough to not care if I'm watching him to tricks in the pool.

Loud sex 🤷🏼‍♀️

You never ever switch off. Even if they're elsewhere, you constantly think about them, plan how to manage/feed/clothe/look after them, worry about how enriching their lives are etc. If you have a decent enough support network, most things will be within your reach, but mentally you will never been the same again. And it's absolutely worth it!

Getting hammered on holiday and rolling in when you feel like it

I guess the biggest adjustment is not being able to just “pop out” very easily and not being able to go out at all after bedtime, if you’re partner’s already out.

You can’t just have a lazy day watching box sets with the curtains closed (unless you count kids programmes!)

Honestly, it’s different for everyone and it’s not a change you can plan or prepare for.

Run or bounce in a trampoline.

Getting pissed when you want

Pelvic floor is a bit fucked (I’m ok as long as I pee before any stupid activity)

I always advise those considering children to spend a lot of time alone on the toilet and to savour very minute.

Do anything without considering their needs first.