That if you kid is vegan you don't withhold that information till 6 hours before the playday?

[Luxplus]

Sunday a girls mom from nusery txt me and wants to plan playday for today with dd1. All well, arrange that I pick the girls up at 2.30pm after I get off work and the girl eats here. I ask the mom regarding allergies ect and get told "the girl is not fussy - likes food" all well and good.
I buy and plan to make pasta carbonara with corn hobbs (a favourite dish with my dds).
9am this morning get a txt from the mom "oh btw you do know that girl is vegan?" ... Nope did not know that
So spend my break and inbetween time at work searching for vegan recipes for kids... Hurried out after work to shop vegan stuff and managed to make falafel in lettuces burgers with fries. Was actually quite proud of myself for pulling it off (not a confident chef). Dad turns up and it turns out that the family only eats fries for birthdays ... No received a txt from me asking me to plz remember that the family do not eat any processed food and that she prefers me to not serve the unhealthy food we normally eat for her girl?
What the heck do I answer back to that?

I also can't believe she instigated the play date - at your house?! And then was so ridiculously demanding!

The mother sounds socially inept.

Rightly or wrongly, I most strongly foster my DCs' friendships with the mothers who are the most normal / fun to be around.

I had a whole class party once. A mum who I knew to say hi and chat to was there with child. My child had been to their house and vice versa. Saw her scanning the table and she said "Do you have a jam sandwich?" " Pardon? " "Felix is vegan and I just assumed you'd have a jam sandwich" .Never bothered to mention it before. People are weird.

Pasta isn't normally vegan though as it's got eggs in it. Although there is vegan pasta but that would require foreknowledge.

Only fresh pasta has eggs in. Dried pasta is vegan.

For info I think most dried pasta is vegan, the fresh stuff tends not to be.
I'm vegan and I think you did well OP and the mother is being ridiculous. I really hope you didn't apologise at all in your reply.

Case of my house my rules. But yeah I would be telling her to send a pack up next time - if I bothered with a next time

I am vegan and she's a cheeky twat!

As an aside, you can get vegan 'chicken' nuggets, 'fish' fingers, sausages.... it's amazing

Yep, tell her to get fucked!

Asda do a create your own pizza with vegan cheese. That could be an option if she comes again, with fries of course 😉.

Hi Luxplus

I’m pretty sure most dried pasta is ok for vegans. It’s fresh pasta that tends to be made with egg. However this is a moot point as I too would be telling the rude, ungrateful mother to fuck right off

If vegan "cheese" isn't processed food, I don't know what is.

pasta isn't vegan unless you get some special ones

Again, dried pasta is vegan.

I think this girls mother was a cheeky fucker but I do think you were making things harder than they needed to be.

Thanks DoesItGetAnyBetter, that's good to know if I ever dare to cook for the girl again.

Lux I didn't think for a moment you would give a veggie child chicken, it was another poster who said she'd consider doing it to see what happened. Your falafel option sounds brilliant especially at short notice!

In the unlikely event that you agree to host another playdate you could try
baked potato and hummus / beans
noodles and stir fry (rice noodles are vegan, some wheat ones are too)
beans on toast
pasta and free-from pesto
baked sweet potato with hummus for whole-food points
McCains smiley faces, quorn fishless fingers and ketchup if you want to piss her off

You did well to pull something off last minute. Normally for playdates I'll serve pizza/nuggets/fish fingers as I have yet to meet a child who won't eat this! Definitely in future make plans to avoid meals

What?!? I can't even. She said what????
Are you sure she wasn't joking?

Assuming you made the burger from scratch it doesn't sound very processed anyway! She sounds awfully entitled.

I’d tell her play dates obviously don’t suit her, so it won’t be happening again. Cheeky fucker

That sounds perfectly fine and acceptable for a one off playdate. The mum was being incredibly rude by not giving you this information in advance and then berating you for being "healthy enough"

Text back

"Wish I'd known earlier. We stopped for a Greggs sausage roll on the way home."

Why not be constructive and ask for recipes if you want her to continue coming. It’s a bit crap but people aren’t always as on it as they should be!

pasta isn't vegan unless you get some special ones

Most DRIED pasta in this country is vegan. Discalimer - we are not vegans (not that I object to vegans) but have DC who is allergic to egg and milk.

Good answer MustShow!

That sounded bad not constructive I mean offer an olive branch!

Horrible comments @OldIrishTERF. Totally unnecessary