Would you wreck someone’s wedding if they wrecked yours?

[Butterfliestastewiththeirfeet]

I know I’m BU but it’s a thought that’s crossed my mind.

I’ve NC and not going in to finer detail because it’s outing.

So yeah PIL and Bil did a great job of turning our wedding in to something awful. I feel it was done on purpose because of something that was said to a close friend of mine before the day off Bil.

I’ll never forget BILs smirk as he was leaving. Dh was dealing with something else. His new girlfriend at the time was also incredibly rude to DH a while later. Dh didn’t tell me at the time because he knew how upset I was still over the wedding.

I was so upset after the wedding. I couldn’t talk about it for a few weeks with out crying and for about four/five months after I was incredibly low. It was an expensive wedding, looked forward to it for years and I couldn’t get past that i felt they had done it out of spite. I’m NC with Bil and his girlfriend. Very low contact with PIL

Dh is in low contact with bil and his girlfriend.

I’ve honestly put up with some much shit of this family. For years I kept quiet not to rock the boat bit this was the last straw.

Any way BIL girlfriend is about to become his fiancé. I know for a fact he has already cheated on her. That’s what he does. He has always been like that.

I’m having thoughts that I’m going to send an engagement present and ‘build bridges’ just so i can go to the wedding and wreck it for them.

The thought gives me so much pleasure.

I know I’m acting like a complete psycho.

I wouldn’t. I’d send a “congratulations on finally deciding to become monogamous!” card.

Don't care if I get flamed as most people will probably say no.

But yes I would. I wouldn't do anything illegal or anything that would put people in danger though.

What goes around comes around and they should've been more mindful of the fact it might be their wedding getting ruined one day.

I love these!

The card and shit in a box is a great idea! 😂😂

OP. please don't wreck their wedding. I just wouldn't go, I wouldn't even acknowledge the engagement either. Just keep a dignified silence, and if the engagement/wedding is mentioned just say 'lovely' and change the subject.

I know I'm acting like a complete psycho.

Yup.

It's not just BIL's wedding you'd ruin but another girl that has probably dreamed about their wedding as much as you.

Also Dont has a very good idea.

With a nice message along the lines of "I'm so happy he has finally decided to commit to you and only you!"

pushing quite!

I once dreamt I phoned up a wedding venue and cancelled someone’s day for them.

So glad I reread this before replying with a couple of choice names for you. I didn't see the dreamt bit the first time!

Their wedding is already wrecked. He's a piece of shit and she's a dickhead. There'll be no happiness or lasting joy in their union, surely that's enough? Don't build bridges, don't acknowledge their wedding and don't give them a moment more of your time.

I do love the idea of phoning the venue and cancelling, though; it's purest evil.

It's fine to think it but not good at all to do it. Just stay away. I'm sure that life will provide all the 'revenge' necessary.

So is BIL's gf a bitch too? What did she say to DH?

Hadal and Stripping but I feel like a mug. I know she would have been dreaming of this day but I still feel hurt and it’s making me feel spiteful

Why? You're NC with them, stay that way! I know its bloody tempting but if you do anything its just going to stir up a load more drama and the way these things usually go you'll be seen as the trouble maker. Nothing is going to change what happened at your wedding now, its over and done with, gone. Just be content with being smug about the fact he's cheated on her and their marriage will be a joke with or without anyone sabotaging the wedding!

Was the girlfriend involved in your wedding at all? If not, I don't think it's fair to punish her for something she had no involvement in.

I love the card idea.

You cried for weeks and were low for months?

It’s hard not to sound harsh here, but that isn’t healthy. At all. You obviously bear grudges and become bitter about minor things. I’d work on yourself before you start ‘working’ on others

Thoughts are fine. But YWBVU to act on them. Unless I've misunderstood your OP, it was your PIL and BIL who you feel ruined your wedding, so why punish your BIL's fiancé? She's in for a rough time of it anyway by the sounds of it.

Stay NC with them.

It all sounds so petty and small. Rise above it.

OP what did they do at your wedding? Was it some kind of joke that misfired, or was it deliberately nasty?

Those in glass houses... And all that....

You should definitely give them a taste of their own medicine on the day , ruin their day like they ruined yours.

Enjoy the private fantasy, revel in it for a while... then sit back and enjoy the fact that you are just fundamentally a better human being and will let them ruin their marriage all by themselves