I've been sacked

[user910]

Two AIBU's in this I suppose.
I stopped being a SAHM almost 6 months ago and started my probation period in a new role. I loved it mainly because I loved my team and thought I'd made a few good friends in our small team.
Management got took over when I was almost 6 weeks in and I felt the atmosphere changed with the new manager and could feel her being very nit-picky with me and not warming to me.
Over the past month, there's been 3 occasions where I've ran 5 minutes late into work. I've informed them every time. I've been going through a difficult time in my personal life as I've been through a bad break up where police had to be involved with my ex becoming aggressive and I've been adjusting to being a single parent to a 2 year old- and although it's no excuse for bad punctuality, it did affect me and I felt completely unsupported at work. My performance at work stayed consistent and I was continuously learning new aspects of the job, though.
The other morning I rang to explain that my toddler was unwell and I just had to ensure he ate and felt a bit better before he went to nursery but I'd make up the missed half an hour whenever they needed me. I was completely snapped at down the phone. I asked the manager a few times during the day if she wanted to have a chat about it and she told me to wait until the end of the day. And right before my shift finished, they sacked me.

I completely understand lates are unacceptable but AIBU to think they could've at least told me in the morning so I could get home to my sick child/be a little more understanding to my circumstances and issue a final warning given that my performance at work was good?

And AIBU to be bothered that NO ONE even messaged to check I'm alright? They are people I spoke to out of work, we went on nights out, we spoke a lot about personal stuff in work, and I just got removed from the group chat and didn't receive a single message.

Please tell me I'm being unreasonable, I feel like I'm not but reading it back I'm worried I sound a bit entitled!

"And AIBU to be bothered that NO ONE even messaged to check I'm alright?"

They've probably been told not to contact you as you've been let go - standard practice I'm afraid....

So sorry op that's horrible. I'm not too clued up on employment stuff but I think if you've worked somewhere less than 2 years you can get sacked willy nilly unless there's some discrimination afoot.

Your colleagues clearly want to distance themselves from you which is sad but they're clearly not the supportive bunch you took them for.

Sounds like you're going to have to get your personal stuff sorted before you can commit to a job, I hope things get better for you soon x

If you're in your probation period then being frequently late could result in dismissal. Hope you find another job soon. 💐💐💐

It's standard for a sacking to be done at the end of the shift so that you can go straight home, and standard to remove people from chats that are work-related. It's nothing personal.

Unfortunately it sounds like you just haven't had the time to build up a relationship with your manager, so repeated lateness will just not have come across well.

I think it completely depends on the workplace.

A few places i've worked 3 instances of lateness clocking in in a month would have been a written warning. At my current job people wander in an hour late and stay an hour late, they're very flexible.

It sounds like this might not be the right workplace for you if you want flexibility.

Really sorry to hear that, OP.

But they sound like a horrible company who have no idea how difficult it is for parents, especially single parents, to juggle work and childcare and children do get ill sometimes.

It may turn out to be a blessing in disguise and hopefully you'll find something else soon, and with an employer that is more understanding and flexible.

Are you still on probation? Check your contract regarding discipline and dismissal. Were proper policies and procedures followed. If not you may have a case for unfair dismissal.

I’m really sorry for you OP but you sound unreliable. Tricky circs for sure but a new employer won’t have much sympathy- they don’t know you, so don’t care. Consistently late in the first few months would ring huge alarm bells for me I’m afraid. The reasons wouldn’t matter for an employer who isn’t yet invested in a member of staff.

Learn from this. I’m sorry you’ve had a shit time. Start a new job afresh and don’t let this happen again.

Hotseat - she doesn’t. You need two years’ service for UD.

I’m sorry this has happened. I think it’s one of those things. Clearly this is a very strict and rigid workplace and with everything that’s going on right now, you haven’t been able to live up to their time keeping standards. It just wasn’t a good fit as you need something with a little flexibility.
As for telling you in the afternoon- there were probably internal meetings going on to decide what the course of action would be and it wouldn’t have been an instant decision. Or it might be policy to do it at the end of a shift as you have to go straight home afterwards.
The rest of the employees have probably been told not to contact you- it’s completely appropriate that they’ve removed you from the chat.
I hope this turns out to be for the best and you find a new job with nice, understanding bosses.

Our place always sacks people who are late while still in probation, the thought being that things will probably get even worse once they're out of it.

Hotseat how on earth would she have a claim for unfair dismissal? She's in the probation period!

I think they were probably advised not to contact you. Try not to take it personally.

What reason did they give for ending your employment or not meeting probation, OP? Was it anything that they had raised previously?

It would be standard to remove you from a work group chat or similar straight away, nothing to stop colleagues contacting you outside of work though.

It is always a shock, hope you are doing OK.

The other morning I rang to explain that my toddler was unwell and I just had to ensure he ate and felt a bit better before he went to nursery but I'd make up the missed half an hour whenever they needed me.

This was your downfall I'm afraid OP. This is generally not considered acceptable in the workplace unless you work in a fairly flexible laid back sort of place. And even then many of these places claim to be but actually aren't.

OP - I think that sounds horrible. I hope you are ok. You sound like a hard worker and I hope you get a job with a better culture where you can flourish. See it as less time wasted at a rubbish company.

How does the 2 years service work if she worked for the company before and came back from Mat leave in to a new role - does it count as continuous service or start back to probation because the role is new (even if the employer isn't?)
I'm not sure form the op if she worked there before Mat leave

Repeated lateness in the first 6 months. Sorry, but regardless of the reason most firms would’ve done the same.

Thanks everyone.
Think I just need some time to calm down. I'm now a single parent desperately trying to find a job to be able to keep my toddler in his nursery and if I'm honest, just feel like my pride has been completely hurt and feel completely embarrassed!

As difficult as it is for you OP, and I’ve been a lone parent of two under 4, calling to say you will be late because you just want to make sure your child eats and feels better just isn’t acceptable. Honestly, I know to you he is the priority, but as far as work goes it just doesn’t cut it.

Sorry, but I think YABU.

Seconding what LakieLady said. I'm so sorry this happened to you -- it must be very upsetting.

I get what people are saying about lateness being a problem in their workplaces. But it really depends on the industry and what position you have. In lots of office jobs, turning up five minutes late after your official start time is really no big deal, and it would be weird and petty for a manager to even notice. In other jobs that are based on shift work, I'm sure there is more of an expectation you start exactly on the dot.

(Thinking of the bigger context, the fact that any job requires employees to be 100% rigid in their time keeping, with no room at all for emergencies, just shows how unreasonable and non-family friendly modern workplaces are... Which of course affects single parents much more, and women who often are expected to handle care-related emergencies.)

It’s such a juggle. I completely understand why you’d WANT to do that for your toddler, but you just can’t in a new job. You have to get to work on time. You can’t take your baggage into the office. It sounds inhuman but it’s the way of the world.

Have a little wallow, then pick yourself up and start again. Get your emergency childcare provision in place, if you can, before you start. Don’t be beaten by this. Just like your shit relationship you can come through this bigger and better. This wasn’t the right job, or the right time. Make sure next time it is both those things.

Don’t over invest either. 6 months is nothing. These are your work acquaintances not your friends. Don’t confuse the two and keep a healthy distance.

@Hotseat - please dont give out advice like this. The OP has virtually no rights under two years of employment (other than those pertaining to the Equalities Act). She has no grounds for unfair dismissal.

www.gov.uk/dismissal

I would have looked better if you had stayed off work if your child was sick otherwise looks like an excuse to be late