I've been sacked

[user910]

Two AIBU's in this I suppose.
I stopped being a SAHM almost 6 months ago and started my probation period in a new role. I loved it mainly because I loved my team and thought I'd made a few good friends in our small team.
Management got took over when I was almost 6 weeks in and I felt the atmosphere changed with the new manager and could feel her being very nit-picky with me and not warming to me.
Over the past month, there's been 3 occasions where I've ran 5 minutes late into work. I've informed them every time. I've been going through a difficult time in my personal life as I've been through a bad break up where police had to be involved with my ex becoming aggressive and I've been adjusting to being a single parent to a 2 year old- and although it's no excuse for bad punctuality, it did affect me and I felt completely unsupported at work. My performance at work stayed consistent and I was continuously learning new aspects of the job, though.
The other morning I rang to explain that my toddler was unwell and I just had to ensure he ate and felt a bit better before he went to nursery but I'd make up the missed half an hour whenever they needed me. I was completely snapped at down the phone. I asked the manager a few times during the day if she wanted to have a chat about it and she told me to wait until the end of the day. And right before my shift finished, they sacked me.

I completely understand lates are unacceptable but AIBU to think they could've at least told me in the morning so I could get home to my sick child/be a little more understanding to my circumstances and issue a final warning given that my performance at work was good?

And AIBU to be bothered that NO ONE even messaged to check I'm alright? They are people I spoke to out of work, we went on nights out, we spoke a lot about personal stuff in work, and I just got removed from the group chat and didn't receive a single message.

Please tell me I'm being unreasonable, I feel like I'm not but reading it back I'm worried I sound a bit entitled!

You can't keep being late for work. Can he go to childcare earlier so that this doesn't keep happening in your next job?

@Nancy75

How does the 2 years service work if she worked for the company before and came back from Mat leave in to a new role - does it count as continuous service or start back to probation because the role is new (even if the employer isn't?)

Maternity leave is continuous service. The OP was however in a new job, not returning to her old company

@EllaEllaE it’s less about time keeping not being as important in Officers and more about a letterman of behaviour that reflects the OPs attitude to the role. She’s paid to start at a certain time, she doesn’t have flexible shifts. If someone had been in the company a while with out issues then I would expect the company to be supportive and offer some flexibility. But in the first 6 months? No.

I'm a lone parent. It sucks it really does but when mine were little unless they were puking or shitting they got a dose of calpol and off to nursery they went. I hope you find something soon and remember that although your child is a ray of sunshine no one else gives a toss.

You'll get a 50/50 response rate about on flexibility versus lateness, OP, because everyone has different workplace culture. Eg, I used to work with people with disabilities, so if I was late it had a huge impact on my team, now I work in a very family friendly NGO where we can be very flexible, even at short notice. (My colleague's partner would bring in her baby so she could breastfeed at her desk, kind of flexible! :-) )

I'm really sorry though - getting sacked is shitty, but maybe looking for somewhere that is more flexible and family orientated? These workplaces definitely exist and lots of employers are trying to implement best practice around childcare/care of dependants and workplace flexibility. Good luck. You sound like you need a lovely confidence boost...can you ask a friend to go over your CV and skills etc with you? x

Obviously I don't know what line if work you're in, OP, but what you did would be entirely unreasonable where I worked. And yes, you wouldn't have survived the probation period.

And yes, if you can't make things work when you know you're on probation, then your employer is reasonable in thinking things will only get worse.

You'd have been better just sending your child to nursery than offering that wishy washy 'needing to feed him first' excuse. Had he not recovered, they'd have called you to fetch him home, and the workplace couldn't have used that against you so easily.

But basically, in your next job you have to have yourself and your systems much more organised.

The problem with persistent lateness is that it can affect other staff members and cause bad feeling.

I've had jobs where you couldn't leave until the next shift arrived to take over. If someone is late then others had to stay to cover them which is a pain in the arse when you've got to leave on time For the school run etc.

Maybe working isn't ideal for you at the moment op whilst you're adjusting to your new circumstances.

Did you actually get a reason why you were let go? I was just thinking back to my temping days and I was on a temp-to-perm and the line manager changed and she let me go at 6 months. But I was already applying for other jobs anyway. She told me that I was lovely but she was new and wanted to select her own team (twaddle!) gave me 2 months pay and a good reference.

So you must have had an exit chat? Was HR there too?

Oh my gosh OP, that’s absolutely disgusting. I’m sorry.

I can’t believe some people are saying that this is acceptable and you are to blame. Unless I’m missing something!

My work would never treat a member of staff that way, yes there would be warning but they would be a lot more understanding of your personal situation. Anyone who thinks she is okay has a terrible workplace.

Can you take it up with HR or a union?

I work in HR we dont attend these conversations, it's normal.

Some posters seem to think that family friendly means turning up as and when you like, regardless. I’m sorry for you OP. Being let go is upsetting and I hope you find a job you enjoy soon. Unfortunately, as others have said, if you appear somewhat flaky, no matter what your reason, while on probation so supposedly on ‘best behaviour’, any manager will quite reasonably fear that this will go from bad to worse once your employment is ratified. Best of luck in finding something else.

Are you in the type of job where someone is waiting for you to start so they can leave?

I don't agree that you have no rights here. If the reason you have been dismissed is lateness and that was because of childcare, then you may (and I mean only may), have a claim for indirect discrimination on the grounds of sex. The argument would run like this, they require someone to be absolutely on time on all occasions, this is a "provision, criterion or practice". If, for childcare reasons this is harder to comply with, then they would have to justify this requirement as being necessary for business reasons. They may well be able to do this, if the work is time critical (although as other posters have said many workplaces are entirely flexible on whether you are early on time or late as long as you put in the hours). The tribunal will usually accept that challenges with childcare will more often than not fall to women, hence the sex discrimination point.

Separately, you could also have a claim if you think you were singled out for reasons such as being a female single parent.

We're others always in time ?

Hard to believe now I know but I bet in the future you will look back on this and be glad you're out of there. I was in your scenario a few years ago. I had a manager who took a dislike to me and as I'd be employed less than 12 months I was sacked just like that. Mine didn't even wait till the end of the day! Called me in at 10 am and said I was sacked and to hand in my security pass on the way out! I was devastated and humiliated. None of my colleagues even looked at me as I packed up my stuff and left.

However, I got a much better and higher paid job within weeks. With nice colleagues! So I'm glad now that it all happened as it got me out of that toxic environment. I understand your colleagues removing you from work chat, but you would think one or two of them would have at least sent you a message saying "hope you're ok" or whatever. As long as they don't talk to you specifically about work I don't see how that wouldn't be "allowed".

I can’t believe some people are saying that this is acceptable and you are to blame. Unless I’m missing something!

I think you have! OP has been late 4 times this last month whilst still in her probationary 6 months in a new job. She was let go as a result of this. It’s really entirely how anyone would expect it to go tbh.

Obviously I must have a different workplace culture then because being 5 minutes late a few times would not be a big deal if you are going through a difficult time if you have a legitimate reason.

I think it’s a shame as employers like this tend to have a high staff turnover and miss out on keeping staff that will be loyal and productive in the long term.

I hope you will find a good new workplace with a nice manager OP.

I do wonder why so many jobs are strict on starting times. Obviously some jobs like retail, healthcare, teaching etc you need to be there on time.

I’ve had many office jobs - and I can’t think of any with strict times - it’s all been flexitime.

@flamingoago I'd known colleagues who I'd worked with to have 2/3 lates in a week and not be called up on it. I brought this up at the time and the comment was basically dismissed as those staff members aren't in there probation period.

Are you in a job where it's life and death if you are late? They sound like a bunch of idiots who want automatons, not human staff and you are better off out of there.

Curious about what kind of industry the job was in OP? If you were just a few mins late a few times, it's incredible to me that could ever be a reason for dismissal (as many PPs seem adamant). But I work in an industry where you are judged for the quality of your work rather than just presence in the workplace.

You are better off out of there - hope you find something better soon.

I’ve had many office jobs - and I can’t think of any with strict times - it’s all been flexitime

Exactly, we can turn up any time before ten, and leave any time after 4pm, as long we do 7 hours and work those core hours. It avoid treating staff like children.

I find it quite astonishing that someone who has only been there 5 minutes herself can sack someone. I'd expect HR to be involved, and I would expect them to be at a meeting sacking someone, even if they are in their probation especially a single mum who might make a claim for indirect sex discrimination. But I suppose it depends on the size of the company.

I’ve never had flexitime

I worked somewhere where someone was sacked for being off ill too much. We were explicitly told not to contact the person. It was horrible as quite a few of us really wanted to. So please don't assume that your colleagues don't want to contact you.

I'm really sorry, OP; I've had to let employees go under these circumstances myself and it's never pleasant. Despite the predictable cries of "terrible employer" they can only give so much, and sometimes experience teaches even the best employers that lots of leniency during probation can lead to downright pisstaking once it's completed

That's why we have probation periods really, so you can see if the role suits and the employer finds out if you're a good fit or not. Hopefully you'll be more successful next time - and hopefully you'll be able to negotiate adjustments once your trial period's over