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AIBU?

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Original poster

Teacher shouted at me

223 replies

Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 11:54

Dropped my DD off at nursery and walk round past the junior school building to get out. I’m pushing a buggy, which has my 1yo asleep in. A teacher opens her door and starts shouting at me. I can’t hear so walk closer to her and say pardon and she shouts at me “we are trying to do a test in here”. I’m confused and look around and say ok? Then another parent comes over and picks up her nursery aged child who had wondered over to the classroom window. The teacher obviously thought the child was mine. I’m pretty shocked. Firstly, when did it become ok to shout at parents on school grounds? Secondly, you're shouting at the wrong parent. Thirdly, it’s nursery pick up time and your window is on the pick up route (there’s no alternative). Would I be unreasonable to drop in the office on my afternoon run to mention it? Or is this just the norm now?!

OP posts:
Strugglingtodomybest · 13/05/2019 14:13

Ah so it's ok for the teacher to be angry and shout at another adult, the wrong adult for that matter, but this poster should grow up and act like an adultthe hypocrisy.

One of my mottos for life is, two wrongs don't make a right.

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 14:13

clairemcnam

Nope because no other adults ever shout at me in the street, or playground. If they did, yes I probably would go through life constantly battling, because I wouldn't put up with people trying to embarrass me in public.

Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:13

There was me and two other parents who were chatting to each other. She was shouting only at me. When the other parent realised what was going on she went to retrieve her child.

OP posts:
SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 13/05/2019 14:13

@Ihatemyselffordoingthis - for a start, the OP hasn’t mentioned any signs, or being aware of any communication about it being SATS week and asking nursery parents to be quiet at pick up and drop off time, and secondly, nowhere in her posts does she say she or her child were being noisy or doing anything to disturb the test, so I think you are making some rather nasty assumptions about her, based on no evidence whatsoever!

somecakefather · 13/05/2019 14:14

I would have been on the phone to the head by now

Why? This really is a very minor thing to be upset about. I would be embarrassed to ring the school about this. Do you not realise the school are rolling their eyes at these kind of silly complaints. They may say all the right things to placate you at the time but they really think you're 'one of those parents'.

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 14:14

Oh and the OP was being far from a nightmare.

my2bundles · 13/05/2019 14:14

Some posters are acting like snowflaKeswick. No concerns for children being disrupted but taking offence at a teacher telling an adult to keep toddlers quiet. Some saying they would complain to the head. How about showing consideration to the older children who are in school to learn, teach your children from a young age to leave the grounds without disrusting older classes. But that's to much to ask from a new generation of parents who take offence at being asked to be quiet during exam week.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 13/05/2019 14:15

Ah - cross posted with the OP about her chatting to two other parents - though if she was so far from the classroom that she couldn’t hear what the teacher shouted at her, and had to move closer, I doubt they were disturbing the test by just talking.

Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:15

There were no signs, I’m sure of that. I’m one of ‘those’ who stop and read them in case they are about head lice.

OP posts:
Bobmcbob · 13/05/2019 14:16

My DS is doing his SATs today. He’s a bit on edge about it, but not too bad. I’ve heard others in his class have been very stressed about it. So whilst the children may well be used to the distraction of toddlers passing by, today could be a completely different kettle of fish.

The SATs are a massive measure of his well a school is doing and individually for each teacher. Plus, the teachers have spent so long prepping the kids and helping them with probably meltdowns and confidence boosting. Teachers are just people - they care about their work and the kids - they can get stressed too and not do the right thing. People saying the teacher is in the wrong job because of this one very very minor thing are barmy!

I’m also very sensitive and I know that this would upset me too. But, OP, don’t complain. Maybe send an email to the school asking them to inform the nursery to ask parents to be quiet. But if you complain what do you want to happen - teacher to apologise? Is it that big a deal?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 13/05/2019 14:17

@my2bundles - the OP isn’t upset because the teacher shouted at her to keep her toddler quiet - she is upset because the teacher shouted at her to keep someone else’s toddler quiet - which makes a difference. I think.

my2bundles · 13/05/2019 14:18

MillI. Tbe teacher was trying to stop disruption. She was supervising an exam she didn't have time to find out who was making noise but she did have to stop it. Parents chatting in a playground when older year groups are in class is ignorant and selfish to say the least.

toomuchtooold · 13/05/2019 14:21

She shouted at everyone to ensure tne disruption stopped

See the funny thing is, at 10 or 11, I'd have found the shouting adult way more scary distracting than the kid but I guess that's just a measure of what a snowflake I was then and am now.

Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:21

It wasn’t me chatting, sorry if my previous post was confusing. I was walking alone with 1yo asleep in buggy. Two other parents were walking together chatting. There was only 3 of us at that time in total with 3 children, one of which was asleep. (I don’t know the other parents).

OP posts:
Teddybear45 · 13/05/2019 14:22

The teacher shouted at you because SATs are important and she clearly cares about her class. Let it go.

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 13/05/2019 14:22

The children taking the test are going to be far more distracted by the teacher opening the door and shouting than they are by some random toddler outside.

How would you know, you weren't there? I think the teacher is quite invested in the situation and would know best what is disturbing the class she's been forced to nurture through these ludicrous tests.

I have a kid in Y2. He knows there's SATS this week, I know there's SATs this week. I think it is highly unlikely that these haven't been drawn to the attention of everyone in the school community. They are high stakes

OP has changed her story now - 3 parents chatting in the playground, PLUS a child at the window. @STG I'm not trying to be nasty - but I do think the OP is probably culpable for the disturbance, if only by association, and that is why she is sensitive to what can't have been very loud shouting if she couldn't hear what was being said

clairemcnam · 13/05/2019 14:23

Okay drogo glad to hear you have had such an easy life. In my life experiences this is incredibly minor. And yes I would judge any adult who made a big deal out of this as a total drama queen.

my2bundles · 13/05/2019 14:23

Toomuchtoold. I imagine the teacher shouted because the class had already been disrupted by the noise in the playground.

Mummyoflittledragon · 13/05/2019 14:23

The SATS spellings were this morning so the children were trying to listen to the recording hence the teacher shouting over to you.

She wasn’t just addressing you or in some way singling you out, she was trying to get the parent of the child to shut the child up. You responded to her, plain and simple.

Someone said upthread that it’s not ‘A’ levels or some such. No, but these are exams none the less and the same rules apply as any other exam regardless of level.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino · 13/05/2019 14:25

I must say I'm finding it rather depressing the number of adults who want to put their hurty feelz over the needs of children who will have been working really hard for these tests.

Bobmcbob · 13/05/2019 14:25

So you were in a group standing outside the classroom of at least 6: 3 adults talking and at least 3 toddlers? And one of the toddlers belonged to one of the parents you were talking to? We’re you all standing relatively close talking to each other? If so, wasn’t the teacher just shouting in the general direction. She may have caught your eyes, and directed it at you. But sounds like it was directed at your group. Teacher was in exam situation didn’t have time to ascertain which of the group were responsible for errant toddler. But equally could’ve been that a 6+ group of activity generated more noise than you thought.

Granted if you didn’t know it was SATs, so they could’ve put up signs. But still??

Catchingbentcoppers · 13/05/2019 14:26

I must say I'm finding it rather depressing the number of adults who want to put their hurty feelz over the needs of children who will have been working really hard for these tests.

This!

Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:26

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis - I wasn’t chatting!
2 individuals chatting to each other as they walk were not loud by any stretch.

OP posts:
LadyRannaldini · 13/05/2019 14:28

I would have been on the phone to the head by now.

Oh please do, Heads need a laugh in SATs week!

Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:28

One of us were standing outside the classroom! I was actually rushing my sleeping 1yo home. The ‘disturbance’ was 2 adults and 2 children.

OP posts:
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