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AIBU?

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Original poster

Teacher shouted at me

223 replies

Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 11:54

Dropped my DD off at nursery and walk round past the junior school building to get out. I’m pushing a buggy, which has my 1yo asleep in. A teacher opens her door and starts shouting at me. I can’t hear so walk closer to her and say pardon and she shouts at me “we are trying to do a test in here”. I’m confused and look around and say ok? Then another parent comes over and picks up her nursery aged child who had wondered over to the classroom window. The teacher obviously thought the child was mine. I’m pretty shocked. Firstly, when did it become ok to shout at parents on school grounds? Secondly, you're shouting at the wrong parent. Thirdly, it’s nursery pick up time and your window is on the pick up route (there’s no alternative). Would I be unreasonable to drop in the office on my afternoon run to mention it? Or is this just the norm now?!

OP posts:
Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 13:44

@lazylinguist

No she was shouting at another adult and giving her into trouble as though she was a child. I wouldn't complain, I would have just calmly asked her who the fuck she thought she was talking to, in only a slightly nicer way.

isittheholidaysyet · 13/05/2019 13:44

claire

Exactly. Which is why we come on mumsnet to check if we are being reasonable or not.
It's not usual for adults to suffer from hurts from school. School staff need to be aware of that when dealing with parents, as parents can't (easily) avoid interacting with schools.
I think teachers often treat parents like kids, and it doesn't make for good relationships.

Lllot5 · 13/05/2019 13:45

If they’re trying to do tests she needs to stop shouting surely.

Kazzyhoward · 13/05/2019 13:46

So, she's supervising a test, so can't leave the room, and even though she was shouting, you couldn't hear and had to get closer.

How else could she have spoken to you without shouting??

When there's so much wrong in the World, it's a little strange to get wound up over something so trivial. Just forget and move on.

coffeegrounds · 13/05/2019 13:47

no, go for it, make a huge scandal because you are a bit miffed, be that person.

As if I even suggested making a 'huge scandal'

But then, do make sure you are doing every single thing by the book, and never ask the school for a favour and a bit of help because it works both ways. Also pray that your kid will never be in that teacher's class.
If you are certain you are always 100% perfect, on time, and your kid's behaviour is immaculate, yes, go for it complain.

I'm not sure if you realise but I am not the OP. I am not going to do anything. I simply made a comment about how I would feel injustice on a personal level and would have to tell school it wasn't me.

I then asked you a question but you decided that rather than answer me you would have another go at me, how mature of you.

I think we are done here.

PamelaX · 13/05/2019 13:50

coffeegrounds
I know you are not the OP, I was just replying to you.

What's the normal response from a normal adult?
to think: oh, that must be embarrassing, that child is not mine.

Then forget about it by the time you have pass the building.

Your life must be quite busy if you get so worked up about "injustice" like that. Grin

mouldyhousemouldylife · 13/05/2019 13:50

So she’s shouting but you can’t hear her.

I imagine she COULD hear her, but was unable to decipher what the unwarranted tirade was about?!

mouldyhousemouldylife · 13/05/2019 13:51

(As she hadn't done anything!)

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 13:51

*Some people seem to think it's a minor detail but I would be fizzing over the injustice of it.

you are an adult, you really need to get over yourself!*

Ah so it's ok for the teacher to be angry and shout at another adult, the wrong adult for that matter, but this poster should grow up and act like an adult 😂 the hypocrisy.

diddl · 13/05/2019 13:52

"there’s only one way in and out for the 11.30 and 12.30 pick ups and drop offs."

So you'd think that signs would be a given!

mouldyhousemouldylife · 13/05/2019 13:53

I would be fizzing over the injustice of it.

I love this description! Fizzing 😂

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 13:55

Until MN, I didn't realise people got worked up about things like this. This is the kind of thing that I probably would not even remember to tell DP about when he came home. Honestly, forget about it. It is such a minor thing.

What being shouted at in the street by other adults and wrongly accused of something. You wouldn't remember that and be a bit pissed off that another adult was giving you into trouble like a child? Ok then.

toomuchtooold · 13/05/2019 13:55

she didnt have time to work out which toddler belongs to which parent

Yeah, best shout at everyone then just to be sure Hmm

What is it with doctors and teachers on here? It's like you can't expect the most basic courtesy from them.

my2bundles · 13/05/2019 13:58

She shouted at everyone to ensure tne disruption stopped. Tne depressing thing about all this is no one seems to be showing any concern for the 10 and 11 year olds who had their exam disrupted. Let's all feel sorry for snowflake parents instead shall we? Disgracefully.

clairemcnam · 13/05/2019 13:59

Drogo No I wouldn't. She was not accused of shoplifting, but of a toddler who had wandered off being hers. It is not a big deal.

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 13/05/2019 13:59

I bet you any money there are signs freaking everywhere but because they don't apply to the OP or loads of the nursery parents, like the parent of said interrupting child, they are oblivious.

I also bet you any money that the teacher has a better idea of what will/is/has been disturbing the children sitting the test than anyone posting on here has. Being as they were there, at the time, and highly invested in the situation, for starters.

OP, I would hate to be shouted at, for any reason, and my inner self would also be a bit put out that I was thought of as being someone who would behave so inconsiderately. But I would get over it.

clairemcnam · 13/05/2019 14:01

The teacher presumably had assumed that the adult who was closest to the toddler was their mum. Which was a reasonable assumption to make.
Seriously some of you need to look at your ability to be resilient. This is incredibly minor.

TheSerenDipitY · 13/05/2019 14:02

next time, put your finger to your lips and say shush, then yell really loud the baby is sleeping!

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 14:03

claire that is strange, good for you though. Lie down and take another adult being a CF.

horizontalis · 13/05/2019 14:05

The children taking the test are going to be far more distracted by the teacher opening the door and shouting than they are by some random toddler outside.

I'd mention it - but them I am the sort of person who takes exception to being told off for something that isn't my fault.

Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:06

mouldyhousemouldylife and Drogosnextwife - spot on

OP posts:
Original poster
Millie2018 · 13/05/2019 14:09

my2bundles I wondered how long it would take for someone to say snowflake!

OP posts:
clairemcnam · 13/05/2019 14:10

Drogo You must go through life constantly battling people?
And no, the teacher is not a CF.
As I said I know from working with the public that they are a nightmare.

FlyingElbows · 13/05/2019 14:11

Just you and this one other parent in the playground? Or you, that other parent and 24 more parents all with feral toddlers? If nursery kids outside are causing a distraction the teacher cannot leave the room to go round every nursery parent to see who Trevor belongs to. It's a quick general shout out to everyone. If one person chooses to take that as some sort of personal attack then that's their issue. Op if you didn't hear her the first time she was clearly not shouting "at" you.

Drogosnextwife · 13/05/2019 14:11

As I said teachers do no wrong. They have the most stressful job in the world 🙄