Aibu to think you don't leave ten year old home alone for three hours ????

[HotChocLit]

My neighbour works 23 miles away. We live rurally. Last year she left her then 9 year old locked out. Hed had forgotten his house key. I rang her husband. I was a bit worried at the time but put it down to a mistake. It happened again this afternoon. Would you think it unreasonable to report concerns to Children's services?

behappy123 can't your 23yo take a taxi?
Nothing will happen to a 10yo in his own home, just not ideal thinking he'd be watching Youtube and shit for all those hours.
Calling SS would be totally out of order.

Are you for real?

Somebody makes parenting choice that differ from your own and you want to notify SS?

How about you stop the curtain twitching and concentrate on your own life? Its none of your business.

She could get a taxi £5 a day so £25 a week, it is only 5 mins drive at a quiet time so not a problem at all for me to go. I'm sure some people's partners pick them up from stations now and again, it's a normal thing to do isn't it? I agree the boy being home alone is not a SS matter.

At 10 my brother was letting himself out, locking the door & taking himself to school every day. Our mum was working 8.00 - 1.00 every day, from being 13 I looked after my 7 year old brother every morning during school holidays, we both knew how to use the phone & had strict instructions on what we could & couldn't do. As we got older our mum increased her hours & one day a week she worked a full day so we had to let ourselves in after school & wait for her to come home. It did us no harm, we knew if we needed any help or had an emergency to go round to our neighbour or phone mum at work.

This happens in lots of households across the country every day, I’m sure? It was certainly me as a child, and my 11 year old gets home an hour before me a few days a week. 3 hours would be longer than I’d want to leave a child that age, but it’s not a social services issue! Why haven’t you offered to keep a key for them? Surely that solves the problem.

@behappy123 your post just came across as "look what an excellent mother I am" I still collect my adult child and she's age 23.

We all have different ways of parenting and I would not follow yours. Neither evidently would the person OP is describing.

It's incredibly easy to judge when you have got time to pick up adult children, be at home for children returning from school. For some it's the difference of being able to pay bills or not.

I'm not sure why your daughter took a position that she can't independently get herself to and from?

You now say it's temporary so this has even less relevance to the situation that the OP is describing.

@behappy123 and who says that the child doesn't come first in the household described?

Can’t you offer to keep a spare key at yours or suggest they hide the key somewhere in their garden? This kid in a few months is expected to get home from school and highly likely spend a few hours by himself as many children that age do, and as many parents start preparing their children to be able to do at this age. It’s not a ss matter, unless the child is coming to harm- forgetting a key twice in 12 months isn’t a dangerous situation. They have bigger fish to fry unfortunately.

howwillwedeal As I said I thought it was a normal thing to do to pick someone up from a station and there are always others there picking up all age ranges so please don't try to say I am doing something strange. I have time because it is in the evening, I work during the day. As you say this has no relevance to the situation the OP is describing. There are clearly 2 definite sides to this discussion.

@behappy123 you're backtracking ... badly!

@behappy123

howwillwedeal the picking up from the tram is only a temporary commitment and I only mentioned it as I thought it was ironic that I was going to pick her up on a dark night when the discussion was about a child of 10 being left alone at home.

How is it ironic? They're two completely different things. And the child in the OP is also a temporary situation as he won't be 10 forever.