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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Off Sick - being forced to come in

209 replies

MyNameIsABCDE · 04/03/2019 09:29

I'm currently having the heaviest, most painful period of my life. I'm soaking through a tampon AND pad every hour or so and have vomited, feel very weak and faint.

I text my boss yesterday to let him know I was ill (didn't mention it was a period but just said I've been sick and dizzy) and to let him know I might not be in today. His reply was just that he needs me to come in. I text again first thing this morning saying I'm still not well but will try and come in later. Again he just said I need you to come in later.

I work in an office. He doesn't 'need' me there. The others in my team are in today and can cover anything urgent that needs to be done today.

AIBU to think that he should just let me have a day off sick and say hope you feel better soon?

OP posts:

YellowFish123 · 04/03/2019 17:08

The only discussion we'd be having at my office unfortunately is a directors' meeting regarding dismissal for disobeying a direct order rom senior management to attend work.

Userplusnumbers · 04/03/2019 17:08

@YellowFish123 has got to be a wind up.

You can write what you like in a policy, doesn't make it legal or fair - as they'll fin out when they get taken to a tribunal - sickness is self certified, or certified by a doctor beyond day 7. The only people that can decide if someone is well enough are medical professionals and their patients.

Streamingbannersofdawn · 04/03/2019 17:08

I've been off for a week with back pain...It doesn't sound much but this time last week I could barely move. My doctor wanted to sign me off this week as well and my Osteopath is looking wary because I want to go in. My company have been amazing I've got reduced duties, extra help and although I explained what id done nobody has grilled me for details.

Sounds like Yellowfish's company would have fired me!

MistyMinge · 04/03/2019 17:08

YellowFish123 which company do you work for? I want to make sure I never ever apply for a job there. I can understand using something like the Bradford Factor to weed out piss takers, but your company sound bloody awful. How can a migraine or flu not be authorised?! Life happens to people, they get ill, have crises.

Op I hope you're feeling better soon and your boss is a lot less cunty than Fish's workplace once you return.

Somerville · 04/03/2019 17:09

The only discussion we'd be having at my office unfortunately is a directors' meeting regarding dismissal for disobeying a direct order rom senior management to attend work.

More brilliant batshittery!

Sallycinnamum · 04/03/2019 17:10

Yellowfish is talking out of her arse and she knows it. Absolute bullshit.

toomanykidsnotenoughme · 04/03/2019 17:10

@YellowFish123 when you say flu would not be authorised, do you mean real flu? As flu means you can't actually drag yourself out of bed, that's how ill you are. And migraines are protections under the Equalities Act. I'm pretty much blind when I get a migraine so certainly can't drive or sit at a computer.
So what would be acceptable? And if some had time off for noro, then got, say, shingles or something, would the person be made to come in as they'd already had an absence for (genuine) sickness? I'm struggling to see how you avoid contagious people coming in.
More details needed, sorry!

missbattenburg · 04/03/2019 17:10

Yeah. Another person here who would tell @YellowFish123 's company to go jump before I worked for someone like that.

How about your managers actually hire good people and manage them to get the best out of them? Inspire them to try hard and reward them well when they succeed? You might find that also lowers sickness levels whilst not simultaneously draining the joy of life out of your employees. They are partners, not slaves.

Right now you're congratulating yourself over lower sickness levels - presumably because people are now too scared to call in. Fear is never a good way to run an organisation. I would expect you to be wondering why you cannot hire/keep good people before long.

RomanyQueen1 · 04/03/2019 17:11

I don't understand why you'd offer to go in. Of course your boss will take you up on your offer.
Call in sick, then go to bed. Go back to work when better.

greenpop21 · 04/03/2019 17:15

Forget work, if you're not well enough, have fainted and are dizzy, you shouldn't be at work. Turn phone off.

PoliticalBiscuit · 04/03/2019 17:18

In my office where I work you need to phone in sick before 5am, then I will send out a flying monkey to peek through your curtains and visibly see the vomit before it's authorised.

If the monkey thinks you look well, you're fired and you have to repay training costs.

It's well legit.

Flobalob · 04/03/2019 17:18

If you've got any clots I'd be taking pictures. Then, if your boss is dismissive of how bad it was, offer to show him the pictures

AuntieOxident · 04/03/2019 17:21

Yellow fish -- you force people with FLU, a highly infectious and potentially dangerous virus to come to work?
Has not your HR or legal department warned you of potential lawsuits if a pregnant woman or person with an immunodeficient condition is exposed to flu unnecessarily at work due to your policies, and dire consequences ensue? You don't sound very professional.

haverhill · 04/03/2019 17:22

Yellowfish, your posts must be a wind up.? I've had seven full-time jobs (I'm 48) and have never heard of such a ridiculously draconian sickness policy. How can people in a boardroom know whether someone is ill enough to work or not?

moosesormeece · 04/03/2019 17:22

On reflection I suspect yellowfish is the poster who was on here a few months ago claiming to lock their employees in to prevent unauthorised toilet breaks

I assume she's here to encourage us all to write to our MPs to demand a better enforcement mechanism for blatant violations of employment rights. And is doing a great job of it too.

I hope you're better tomorrow, OP.

Bluesmartiesarebest · 04/03/2019 17:23

Years ago I worked as a temp in an office run by someone like Yellowfish. They had a very high turnover of staff and it wasn’t unusual for people to walk out after a few days.

Yellowfish, do you have a problem retaining your best staff members?

bringincrazyback · 04/03/2019 17:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

WanderingDaffodil · 04/03/2019 17:24

Your company is soft PoliticalBiscuit. My bosses have set up CCTV in all of our homes and the CEO personally monitors all of them. And they make people who have flu come in just so they can infect everyone else. It's just old fashioned common sense, isn't it? It's such a supportive atmosphere and we are all in it together when we share norovirus.

showmethegin · 04/03/2019 17:26

Agree with PPs saying get medical attention. Also, if he's being this much of an arse I'd tell him exactly what is wrong and try and get the word PERIOD in there as much as possible. Bet you won't get anymore questions then!

Get well soon OP periods suck.

cherish123 · 04/03/2019 17:29

If you said you had been sick, why would he ask you to come in? That is bizarre. You could have a bug and be infectious. He is an idiot.

janetheimpaler · 04/03/2019 17:29

Hi OP, poly cyptic ovaries are a sign of insulin resistance and can and do lead to type 11 diabetics, if you don't change diet/exercise habits. A lot of doctors are complacent about this, but, research a low carb diet and increase your exercise levels, if you don't already exercise. If you have weight to lose, lose it using low carb dieting, increased exercise and perhaps intermitent fasting. It's worth reading Dr. Jason Fung, in this area. Good luck with your employer

Deadbudgie · 04/03/2019 17:30

Yellowfish I would be asking myself the following questions about your company if I were you

Do your employees think they work for a bunch of unfeeling wankers and therefore feel no aligence to the company and therefore not give off their best?
If an employee died after the medically unqualified directors insisted they came to work how much insurance does the company have to cover the inevitable claim?
Why do your arsehole directors think they are qualified to decide on someone’s fitness to work without becoming a qualified doctor first
How many of your staff think you’re a twat and planning to leave?
Ever heard of discrimination covered by the equalities act?
Have you got sufficient resources in public relations?

7.what happens when a client gets a bad service from you and finds out it has been given by someone who is seriously ill and been forced to come into work

Do you care about your employees?

longtimelurkerhelen · 04/03/2019 17:31

@showmethegin

Also, if he's being this much of an arse I'd tell him exactly what is wrong and try and get the word PERIOD in there as much as possible. Bet you won't get anymore questions then

Oh I would go with clots and blood, def back off after that. Maybe you can save some in a jar as evidence to take to work. FFS why does he need to speak with you?

Hope you are better soon.

CornishMaid1 · 04/03/2019 17:32

You are allowed to be ill. If someone is off ill, they have to call in and say why they are off (in general terms), but that is more so we know when to expect them back - if someone has a migraine they are more likely to be back the next day, if it is the flu then they may be a week.

If the boss is a male and is a pain over it, embarrass the hell out of him and he won't do it again in a hurry. One of the men here gets so 'squeamish' over it you just have to say it is 'women issues' and that authorises anything (whether it a day off sick or needing time out for a doctors appointment etc).

Just remember, you are a grown woman and it is your decision whether you are ill or not. As long as you are genuinely ill (and you are - not being genuinely ill to me is a hangover or 'can't be bothered to get up') then he would be unreasonable to do anything more than ask how you are feeling.

ScarletBitch · 04/03/2019 17:46

Period pain is not an A&E problem, go see your GP thou. Hope you are feeling better.

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