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Original poster

DSF saying 4 month olds flirts

206 replies

LLOE7 · 13/02/2019 21:32

My DSF (step father) has said a few times to my 4 month old dd "look at you giving it the big eyes, you're flirting with me aren't you!" When she smiles at him. I've always ignored it as I know it's harmless but it's not sitting right with me. Today we went to the vets and my dd smiled at him to which he said to the receptionist "she's always flirting with me now" and then turned and said to dd "you shouldn't be flirting with ME- I'm your grandad!". This made me feel so uncomfortable and a bit embarrassed as the receptionist raised her eyebrow and gave an awkward smile. Is this just something that's said, or am I right in thinking it's a bit weird?
WIBU to tell him to stop?

OP posts:
endofthelinefinally · 13/02/2019 21:33

Yuk. That is creepy.

Dizzywizz · 13/02/2019 21:36

Yeah that is very weird and highly inappropriate

AbsentmindedWoman · 13/02/2019 21:36

Weird, gross and inappropriate.

Booboostwo · 13/02/2019 21:37

Very weird! Never heard of anyone saying this about a baby.

DaveCoachesgavemetheclap · 13/02/2019 21:37

I feel a bit queasy reading that Confused

Unutterable · 13/02/2019 21:37

Nip this in the bud, immediately. This isn’t the time for politeness and benefit of the doubt.

NCjustforthisthread · 13/02/2019 21:37

🤮 yuck!

Ullupullu · 13/02/2019 21:38

Next time (?) ask him audibly if he knows what that word means. And state you don't think it is appropriate.

user1493413286 · 13/02/2019 21:38

That’s very weird; I’d challenge him by asking him what he means and how a baby can “flirt”

StepAwayFromGoogle · 13/02/2019 21:39

Yep, that's weird. We do say that our 9 month old is flirting when she's all smiles and coy but we definitely don't mean it sexually. And your DSF definitely did. I'm actually going to stop using it your post has weirded me out so much.

GruciusMalfoy · 13/02/2019 21:39

Ugh, I'd get him to stop. Even reading it is uncomfortable.

DuffBeer · 13/02/2019 21:40

Awful.

I would be so mad, I would probably say something along the lines of "actually, you're not her Grandad, so back the fuck off"

Queenofthestress · 13/02/2019 21:40

I absolutely hate anyone saying babies can flirt and would be calling this shit out. Just reminds me of DD's paternal grandmother calling her sexy. It was repulsive.

LilaJude · 13/02/2019 21:41

Gross gross gross

bethlfitz · 13/02/2019 21:41

Yeah you should definitely stop him doing that, it's strange and uncomfortable. Shock

TotHappy · 13/02/2019 21:41

Yeah, at first I thought it might be alright, because flirting doesn't always have sexual / romantic connotations (although usually nowadays) but the comment at the vet's shows it does for him. So it's off.

IDoN0tCare · 13/02/2019 21:45

Exactly what TotHappy said. I actually went eww out loud when I read that last bit. Unfortunately calling him out on it, just means he won’t say it. It doesn’t stop the creepy git thinking it. I take it you’re not going to let them babysit? 🤢

newtlover · 13/02/2019 21:46

'that's a very strange thing to say about a baby'
said with a complete straight face

TortoiseLettuce · 13/02/2019 21:48

My DS smiles at all the ladies and it doesn’t bother me if someone says he’s a flirt or a ladies man. It would be weird if it was a relative saying it because, yknow, incest. But otherwise it wouldn’t bother me.

Oliversmumsarmy · 13/02/2019 21:49

Yep, that's weird. We do say that our 9 month old is flirting when she's all smiles and coy but we definitely don't mean it sexually

Is there another meaning

DoubtingMyselfAsAlways · 13/02/2019 21:49

That's really weird and creepy.

I remember watching some documentary about paedohphiles and a prisoner trying to justify his disgusting acts against babies by saying “but they were flirting with me”

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 13/02/2019 21:49

Yes totally totally inappropriate. I'd say she's a baby, she can't flirt, that's the kind of thing predators say before the 'the victim wanted it really' type comments. I'd have a quiet word with him along the lines of 'I wouldn't want anyone to take this the wrong way' instead of saying anything in public first incase he gets angry you're trying to embarrass him, as the fact he's doing it so publicly makes me think that there's probably no malicious intent

Pinkpanther473 · 13/02/2019 21:50

That would freak me out too
But I remember my mum saying a couple of times that my ?1-2 year old dd was flirting or a flirt and I hated it. I think I asked her not to say that anymore. I felt that she was describing her like she was being manipulative and adult and she was just giggly because she was a very young child fgs.
But from dsf it could mean that you need to be wary of your dd’s contact with him as well, just to be on the safe side.

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 13/02/2019 21:51

I'd also find this weird if someone said it about a boy and how he's a ladies man etc. It's never OK for people to sexualise a baby!

LostInShoebiz · 13/02/2019 21:52

My DS smiles at all the ladies and it doesn’t bother me if someone says he’s a flirt or a ladies man. It would be weird if it was a relative saying it because, yknow, incest. But otherwise it wouldn’t bother me.

Sexual relationships with children only appropriate if there’s a family connection?

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