DSF saying 4 month olds flirts

[LLOE7]

My DSF (step father) has said a few times to my 4 month old dd "look at you giving it the big eyes, you're flirting with me aren't you!" When she smiles at him. I've always ignored it as I know it's harmless but it's not sitting right with me. Today we went to the vets and my dd smiled at him to which he said to the receptionist "she's always flirting with me now" and then turned and said to dd "you shouldn't be flirting with ME- I'm your grandad!". This made me feel so uncomfortable and a bit embarrassed as the receptionist raised her eyebrow and gave an awkward smile. Is this just something that's said, or am I right in thinking it's a bit weird?
WIBU to tell him to stop?

My sister said my dd was flirting with her the other day, she definitely didnt mean it, it was just a joke, some people over react about everything. Typical
of mumsnet.

YANBU!!! How creepy.

Gross

I don't understand how anyone could ever think it's appropriate to use the word flirt when it refers to a child. Likewise the weirdos who say babies or children are sexy. It's just weird and gross.

@Oliversmumsarmy - I thought there was a non-sexual meaning. I say things like 'I was flirting with the idea of getting a new car' for example. But I've just looked it up in the dictionary and, nope, just the sexual meaning in there. So I'll knock that I'm the head pronto.

Grim imo.
My exmil told me ds had to be wearing a nappy 24/7 or he would get sexual feelings!!

Up to the 'I'm your grandad' commenting though you definitely WBU.., but yes saying that is a bit strange. I'd let it go though, unless you genuinely think he's trying to sexualise your dd which I highly doubt

That should read 'knock that on the head pronto'. My phone is having an autocorrect party.

Seriously? She’s a little baby and he’s a proud grandpa, the poor guy would probably be mortified by the reaction on here. I would revel in the fact he sores on her.

*up to the 'I'm your grandad comment' I THOUGHT you were BU 🙄🤦‍♀️

Dotes in her, bloody phone

I know it's seen as really weird but where I was raised it was really common to say this and was due to miscommunication rather than inappropriate beliefs ... so people would say a baby was flirting, my childhood friends often call DS a "sexy little man" - it's odd but they don't literally mean he's sexy .. it just odd local terminology.

I'm not saying you should accept it if it makes you uncomfortable - just explaining that it can be really common

I really don't see an issue. Im sure I've heard people say this about babies and really young kids plenty of times. Maybe it's a gereational thing, but u think in that context I'd totally read flirting as being cute and wide eyed and wrapping me around their finger. Not sexual.

That's vile!

Generational.
And I, not u. (stoopid phone)

I've always thought it was creepy and weird when people say that a young child (or baby, even) was "flirting"-- but this is even worse with the "I'm your grandad" bit added in!

I'd assume no harm was meant, and it's obviously just a (cringe-inducing) joke-y remark, but it's still gross. Unless we had the kind of relationship where I knew he wouldn't be hurt by my mentioning it, I don't know that I could bring myself to say anything to him about it, but I'd definitely be wishing he'd stop.

it's odd but they don't literally mean he's sexy .. it just odd local terminology

Wtf though. What do they mean?

This is so gross and inappropriate. I would never allow unsupervised access and if he kept this up I would block access altogether. Could he be early dementia?

I think it’s a very unfortunate term. However it is true that some babies are particularly attracted to the opposite sex. (Idk about same sex so can’t comment). Not in a sexual nature at all of course . I know I was very drawn to men as a young child and apparently the same was true as a baby. I remember clambering all over one man and being “in love” with him when I was about 5. A boy I know was the same as a baby with women. He glowered at the women in our groupbut not the men.

Seriously? She’s a little baby and he’s a proud grandpa, the poor guy would probably be mortified by the reaction on here

I wouldn’t.

And given the history of sex abuse in my family I’d be on high alert as this sounds like grooming. Paedophiles groom everyone around their chosen victims and will day things in plain sight, that only with hindsight, are a red flag.

But I appreciate I’m a bit touchy about these things.

I assume he thinks he is being funny, and he has got into the habit of saying this.

Trust your instincts - if it makes you uncomfortable say something. See how he reacts. Go in gently first, if he keeps it up be firmer.

Similar thing creeped me out. A woman in Clarkes, fitting my son for his first pair of shoes told me he had “come to bed eyes”. So unnecessary.

Cut and paste fail. Missed out the bit revelling.

I wouldn’t fucking revel in it.

Oops glowered. I meant glowed.

It's weird as fuck.