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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be angry at what their teaching my 5 year old

422 replies

BettyBoo246 · 06/02/2019 09:23

So my 5 year old is having a few issues at the moment. All started with seeing beauty and the beast on a school trip, he got petrified at the wolf scene but wasnt taken out of the theatre and made to watch the rest all be it on the teachers knee. This has caused him to have nightmares since then. Last week they had someone in from nspcc talking about stranger danger, again he got scared and wanted to leave assembly. And now this week they are teaching him about in his words ‘weirdos’ on the internet and now he’s having night terrors screaming at night about weirdos AngrySad
He has always been sensitive and he is the youngest in his class. I’ve called the school this morning and waiting for his teacher to call me back (also to add this teacher is very very young, no children of her own and this is her first year teaching and she can be very patronising)
AIBU??

OP posts:
Original poster
BettyBoo246 · 06/02/2019 09:24

Oh god just seen I’ve put their not they’re BlushBlushAngry

OP posts:
Hollowvictory · 06/02/2019 09:25

What do you want to happen?

Clueing4looks · 06/02/2019 09:26

Is this your first child by any chance?

Bobbiepin · 06/02/2019 09:27

Would you rather he wasn't taught?

Wolfiefan · 06/02/2019 09:28

Beauty and the beast? Sounds like a lovely school trip. He must know about fairy tales etc.
The internet? It’s a whole school assembly about an important issue.
Very young, no children of her own and first year of teaching yet she’s the one who’s patronising Hmm
Don’t dismiss your son’s fears but work to help him put them in proportion and build his resilience.

InDubiousBattle · 06/02/2019 09:28

I don't think any of theses things are unreasonable (although I would find the use of the word 'weirdos' odd- are you sure that was from a teacher?)but the school might have handled it better. How is he at home?

Sirzy · 06/02/2019 09:28

So you don’t want him to be taught stranger danger and internet safety?

Sometimes a bit of fear is good if it means they remember the important lessons

x2boys · 06/02/2019 09:29

Is this not a good thing teaching him about stranger danger ?And lot s of children do have access to the internet from a very early age so surely it's good they are talking to children about the Dangers?

PoliticalBiscuit · 06/02/2019 09:29

Actually BettyBoo I'm normally siding with school on these sorts of issues but I would be similarly concerned and I'd be requesting a meeting with the teacher.

My youngest is not sensitive normally but has his triggers, he shuts down, shakes and zones out at moments of fear. I suppose at some point you can't expect the school to manage the intricate emotional needs of 30 children, but it's his first year of school, he's very young and some even more so.

Perhaps it would help by taking him to the GP first about his night terrors so you can explain to the school clearly about the impact it's having.

YorrickTheBadger · 06/02/2019 09:30

OP you also wrote "all be it"... you do know it's "albeit", right? Not wanting to be snotty but someone pointed it out to me a few years ago at work when I'd sent a department-wide email, and no one had pointed it out for years, i'd been doing it wrong before that.

(totally missing the point of the thread, sorry)

SoyDora · 06/02/2019 09:30

My 5 year old (reception) is doing internet safety this week, they had a police man in to talk to them. They also did a version of stranger danger.
Would you rather they didn’t teach them about these things?

TeenTimesTwo · 06/02/2019 09:31

I think YABU to be angry.

YANBU to discuss with the school the fact that your (y1?) child seems to be more affected than his peers (& reception?), and that maybe he isn't emotionally ready for some of the way the information is being given, so how best to proceed.

CustardCreamLover · 06/02/2019 09:31

@YorrickTheBadger
For years I though albeit was pronounced 'all bite' (some weird German word in my head)

*also misses point of thread

SoyDora · 06/02/2019 09:31

Oh and her teacher is in her 50’s with grown up children, not sure how that’s relevant though?

Walkingdeadfangirl · 06/02/2019 09:32

Your PFB will be fine, its the schools role to teach children about these things.

MrsSmythFarquarson · 06/02/2019 09:32

Ask her to do some resilience work with the class / small group.

BernardsarenotalwaysSaints · 06/02/2019 09:32

What does the teachers NQT status have to do with it? He'd still be being taught it if the teacher had been teaching for 2 decades.

You can't remove them from everything. Stranger danger needs to be taught from an early age as does internet safety.

IceRebel · 06/02/2019 09:32

also to add this teacher is very very young, no children of her own and this is her first year teaching and she can be very patronising

Do you realise how judgemental this is? Not to mention it has nothing to do with the issues you've mentioned. Angry

Her lack of children and being new to teaching doesn't affect the play they went to see at the theatre, or the talk that the NSPCC did of which she will have had no control over. Finally any information or lessons on internet safety is usually agreed as a school, and will be carefully chosen to suit the age group.

I understand your child is more sensitive than his peers, and perhaps asking for help with this is the way forward rather than blaming the teacher.

Buddytheelf85 · 06/02/2019 09:33

Well I suppose the question is what would you prefer to happen? No trip to see B&B, no education about stranger danger?

I remember being given terrible nightmares by a video shown at school about train safety when I was about a year older than your DS. I’m still careful around level crossings now at the age of 32! But I’m not sure a few nightmares was such a bad thing - it really left an impression which was the whole point, really.

Somethingsmellsnice · 06/02/2019 09:33

There is always home schooling! Smile

LittleLongDog · 06/02/2019 09:34

(also to add this teacher is very very young, no children of her own and this is her first year teaching and she can be very patronising)

If it’s her first year teaching then literally none of these things would have been organised by her and other members of staff would also have been around and able to step in had they thought she was making the wrong decision regarding your son.

Trip: the ‘scary’ part was over, did you want him to leave and not see the nice rest of the story? If you wanted him to leave then who with?

NSPCC: a valid assembly choice and important for your son to know.

Internet safety: schools are required to teach this and, again, it’s important for your son to know.

theworldistoosmall · 06/02/2019 09:34

Didn't you do stranger danger around the same age op? I also remember the Charley says ads on tv.
Internet safety, again it's a good thing to teach kids because so many parents are clueless and give free access to devices and create SM accounts for very young kids.
You never read him a fairy tale either?

FiveRedBricks · 06/02/2019 09:34

He's 5. Why doesn't he already know about stranger danger OP?

IggyAce · 06/02/2019 09:35

You need to work with him to build his resilience.
Internet safety is taught throughout school for all year groups. It’s good that they are teaching stranger danger and again this will happen throughout school.
If you don’t start building is resilience he will continue to be upset by topics covered in school. For example in my dcs school they do the great fire of London in year 1 they also did a topic on refugees.

Fancyacuppaluv · 06/02/2019 09:35

YABU Biscuit