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Original poster

To be fed up of how my DP wears clothes

204 replies

Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 14:08

I can hear how much of a twat I sound in the title, but bear with me.

He is a size 8 shoe, he does have wide feet but definitely not unusually wide. He has to wear size 12 shoes apparently, it's obvious these shoes are far too big for him. He doesnt tie his shoes, instead he tucks them in his shoes. His feet are always slipping out and they even often fall off his feet completely. He tucks his jogging bottoms into his shoes.

He's a tracksuit guy, won't ever see him in trousers or a pair of jeans. This alone doesn't bother me, it's the fact he says he has to buy them 2 sizes bigger or he won't wear them. They HANG off him. It's clear they are far too big. He also apparently can't sit down without having to pull his trousers down under his bum so he's only sitting on his boxer shorts. He does this in public and he gets quite a bit of stares.

I have bought him clothes his actual size, and he just donates them to charity or exchange them for a bigger size.

Am I being too picky/controlling and an utter twat, or am I not the only one that can see the problem with this? I haven't gone on and on to him because a) I can't force him to wear clothing true to his size and b) I do think I sound quite controlling Blush.

OP posts:
UpTree · 27/01/2019 14:53

I wear vivo barefoot shoes to work and they’re really comfy.

MitziK · 27/01/2019 14:55

He's a muppet. The way to stop his nads being pinched is to draw the thigh part of the trousers up slightly as he sits down. And to wear trunks rather than giant knicker sized boxers that he dangles down the side of.

The shoe thing is ridiculous and breaches every health and safety rule going. Extra soft and squishy socks and cushioning soles inside his shoes would make it more comfortable but safer.

Is this sort of nonsense how he was dressed as a kid? Or does he subconsciously want to be a child?

Cambionome · 27/01/2019 14:56

This thread is just... bizarre. Confused

ChrisjenAvasarala · 27/01/2019 14:58

Heartofgold, if he goes into nursery to watch his kid in a Xmas show and pulls his trousers down... he will be called much worse things that weirdo. So it's best that OP does something about it, and realises what the people sitting around him will be thinking. If he has sensory issues then he can of course wear whatever feels comfortable, but he can't be pulling his trousers down in public.

FATEdestiny · 27/01/2019 14:58

Does he wear tracksuit bottoms and trainers for work ?

Bakingberry · 27/01/2019 14:58

OP, everything about your post is alarming to me. If you don't mind me asking, how old is he? And does he dress like that for work?

Ghanagirl · 27/01/2019 14:58

I honestly couldn’t be attracted to someone who dressed in such a strange way also I’d worry that someone might think he’s flashing when pulls down his trackies to sit down😕

Original poster
Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 14:59

@Fairenuff he wears trousers to work. When I said he doesn't wear trousers I meant he doesn't wear them when we go out etc.

@EvaHarknessRose I wouldn't know

@steff13 If you read literally the next sentence on the same post you would see I found this ludicrous because I hadn't seen other men do it.

@Brandnewshit he wears trainers. Sorry I call all types of shoes/trainers etc just shoes.

@Heartofgoldheadofcabbage Thank you!!

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 27/01/2019 15:00

Does he pull his trousers all the way down to his thighs when he sits? Or lower them to a hipster position, exposing the top of his pants?

Waveysnail · 27/01/2019 15:01

Sounds incredibly sensory but I would find it tough to live with him

Original poster
Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 15:01

My lack of explaining seems to have struck again! He wears trousers to work (definitely not joggers) and they are 1 size bigger. He wears actual dress shoes to work and they are 2 sizes bigger (but he wears thick socks to work so they don't slide off his feet as much). He does look presentable when he goes to work. Admittedly his trousers are a little baggy still being that 1 size bigger, but no one at work has asked him to wear different trousers so there is no problem with what he wears to work.

OP posts:
Seline · 27/01/2019 15:03

My betting is he has a sensory issue and hates the way it feels. It'd drive me mad too but I also have sensory problems so I get it

ILoveMaxiBondi · 27/01/2019 15:03

I also think sensory issues. If you have a think I bet there are other things that point to this too.

WhentheDealGoesDown · 27/01/2019 15:03

Definitely sounds like some sort of sensory issue, is he funny about his underwear also

IwantedtobeEmmaPeel · 27/01/2019 15:03

He said the pulling the trousers down thing means his trousers isn't pulled tight against his balls while he sits. Maybe he has mahoosive bollocks Grin

Original poster
Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 15:04

When he pulls his joggers down, it's only under his bum. The joggers at the front (crotch area) stay up high. The elasticity and size of the waistband allows him to just pull the back under his bum. Sorry im absolutely terrible at explaining things)

OP posts:
SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst · 27/01/2019 15:04

@Fairenuff he wears trousers to work

So is he wearing oversized trousers to work, and shoes 4 sizes too big? And his boss is happy with this sloppy appearance and trip-hazard while he’s serving food in a hotel?

SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst · 27/01/2019 15:05

Oh. Cross posted.

Original poster
Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 15:06

@SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst please read my other comments before commenting. I managed to compromise with him and to work he wears trousers 1 size bigger and shoes 2 sizes bigger. The thick socks he wears to work means his shoes don't slip off

OP posts:
Original poster
Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 15:06

@SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst I cross posted with you as well

OP posts:
ShatnersBassoon · 27/01/2019 15:07

Is he quite a small man and would like to appear bigger? It sounds as if he just likes the idea of having bigger sizes if he can scale down at work. Trousers one size too big is unnoticeable to anyone but him, and he's not going to be walking out of big shoes padded out with thick socks. Why can't he do this in his own time too (and I'm guessing he's not pulling his trousers down during his break at work)?

Ali1cedowntherabbithole · 27/01/2019 15:07

Thread derail - but I'm well impressed by those barefeet shoes Grin

As a wide footer who now has bunions, I have sympathy with your DP re the shoes. My solution is widefit - and a size up - boots + thick socks in winter and fit-flops in summer.

If it is a sensory thing though, is it a case of finding brands of clothes that he likes?

Thankssomuch · 27/01/2019 15:07

As adults it’s reasonable to expect that we make sure we wear clothes that fit us ie don’t fall off our body, and are clean. This is a minimum standard isn’t it? If we don’t, for whatever reason, then it’s likely that others will form an impression of us based on this and it’s likely to be negative. So OP you’re not being a twat to ask about this and it’s natural that you would feel really embarrassed.

rytonsister · 27/01/2019 15:08

i would also say sensory issue - is he dyspraxic or have any issues associated with ASD?

my son has ASD but high functioning. certain things he just used to refuse to wear. he always looks a proper bag of mashins now even though as a child i dressed him well. i think his shoes are too big.

i would drive me mad if i lived with him. he doesnt pull his trousers down mind you....thats the one i would draw the line at. does he realise it could actually get complaints in public?

Original poster
Foxandthehound · 27/01/2019 15:10

@ShatnersBassoon. He isn't a small man (weight), he's 15st and 5ft 5inch. It took a hours argument for him to agree to wear appropriate clothing to work. I think it's because he knows deep down he looks a bit of a muppet so won't wear clothing too big to work. He can't be convinced to wear appropriate clothing any other time

OP posts:
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