DDs friend has had hair shaved off!! AIBU to be concerned?

[MrsPeony]

Hi,

A friend of my DD (6yo) has had her hair shaved.... think grade one all over. She’s very fair so looks bald. It was previously beautiful, long and well looked after.
I don’t know her family but they have always looked normal at school pick up.

I asked DD about it and she said “because she had bugs in it, she hates it and was crying in school”.

AIBU to be a bit freaked out, and well, concerned for the little girl? Surely an extreme way of dealing with nits??

Yes, the child I am referring to is a male. They were not the only child in primary school with this hair style. It was not ‘unusual’. There was the odd girl as (shock, horror) not all the girls had long hair and not all the boys had short hair at our primary school. Some young girls seemed to want to be very cutting edge I guess is the term, and similarly some boys had long ponytails worn low or high buns. We also had a few mums rocking the no1 here and there at different times. While they claimed it was ‘just wanted a change, something really different’ I always suspected the truth was ‘sick of constant nits despite 1001 treatments and failed professional ersdication’ as I had a friend who had done it for this reason.

Never had to force teeth-brushing or immunisation by brute force myself,

So, just let preschoolers go unimmunised if they are not willingly agreeable? That sounds like a good plan. Maybe your kids were just compliant. I’m betting you don’t have a lot of experience taking blood from young kids either? Not met one who didn’t have to be robustly restrained in order to get the samples, unless they were just too sick to move basically which unfortunately can be the case.

My DD got head lice when she was about 8. I knew no better than to cut her waist long hair to shoulder length. She absolutely hated it, and to this day, cannot forgive me. She is 16 now and though she understands why I did it, she just can't get over how horrible she felt. I would never do this again, so I can fully understand OP's D's classmate crying and feeling awful. YANBU to be concerned.

Charlie97 I don't think they are mutually exclusive. I did it for my child's benefit. If people had criticised me about it I might have said "She cried. So fucking what?" because I can be a bit crass sometimes when I have little respect for the other opinion.

Can people please stop comparing giving vaccinations and general anaesthetics to cutting all a child's hair off because you're too bone idle to do what every other parent does and treat them. Gavel

Not necessarily idleness though. Could be lack of funds, lack of time, lack of knowledge about how to treat headlice. Could be an extremely stubborn case that they've given up hope with. Bad lice infestations can make a child very miserable. Parents may have decided that the short term upset of the haircut may be worth the long term benefit of not being riddled with parasitic insects. In that way, short term pain for long term gain related to health and wellbeing, I think the vaccination analogy is an appropriate one.

because you're too bone idle to do what every other parent does and treat them.

Or because the thing the child won't let you do is treat them the way most parents do...

Or because you've treated them 6 times and the blighters are still coming back...

Or because the treatments cause a nasty reaction in your child...

There are many reasons why the common solution may fit. Assuming idleness seems a step when the idle probably just don't bother at all.

*may not fit

I’ve seen this for help with nits, but also psoriasis.