AIBU to think that a 50 year old man.

[onlinedating2019]

AIBU to think that a 50 year old man who sets his OLD profile to looking for a woman between 27-50 (amd specifies she must be slim) isn’t looking for a woman towards the top end of the age range?

*He is very attractive going by his profile picture.

Gross. Unfortunately standard online dating. The amount of men who set their profiles to 20 years younger is ridiculous

This applies to both sides on OLD BTW

That’s what I thought! I’ll leave that then. My worry would be that if he’s used to dating young girls sometimes, I won’t be able to, or should I say, wouldn’t want to compete.

That is grim. Nothing so delusional as a middle aged man on the pull, thinking a younger woman will be finding him more attractive than his money!

I've seen many women who do that on OLD, it really isn't just men. I'm happy to accept it's more common among men.

What I don’t understand is why set the upper limit to 50, if he’s really wanting the twenty-somethings? Why not just cap it at 35.

Maybe he wants to look like he would date someone his own age when actually he wants someone half his age.

It's grim

And very common

27 is very specific! Some people just aren't fussed about age, and especially men, who don't have the same delineated life stages that women do (want to meet someone by xx age, so I can have children by xx age and be back into full time work within xx months etc) They can just carry on having kids, or not having kids for as long as they like with whomever they like, without it seemingly affecting their life too much.

It seems odd to us because our lives are so much more mapped out than theirs.

Many women would rule out a 20 something man because they'd probably be immature and want mummy-ing or would want to start a family and we're past that now, whereas to a man, sure there's the "she might want kids" question, but that's a lot less of a big deal to men than to the woman who is expected to bear said kids, and most 20 something women are probably MORE eager to please their man and do all the donkey work, whereas they probably know that women in their 40s won't put up with that shit any more!

Well I think the lower limit of 27 is strangely random.

It's really not that unusual: see deluded middle aged French twat as prime example.

www.google.com/amp/s/metro.co.uk/2019/01/08/author-yann-moix-says-women-50-old-love-8320658/amp/

Why is it grim and delusional and gross?

I really can't see what wrong with it?

What's the allowable age difference before the nest of vipers gives their approval?

Well I think the lower limit of 27 is strangely random. He probably has a 26 year old daughter and this is his attempt not to be creepy As for the upper limit, probably again, attempting to seem like a decent fella by saying up to 50, but secretly hoping nobody that age applies!

Was it this guy? Wouldn't necessarily say he was that attractive.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-46788256

Not strangely random - it is still young but not creepy too young. A 27 year old woman is likely to have a career sorted (important to both the middle aged man who wants to convince himself that she isn't with him for his financial security and the man who has an ex wife and children to pay for).

If you are within the age range specified then go for it. OLD sites often have far more men than women registered on them, and women tend to be skewed towards the younger side. It’s very possible he may want to date slim women his age, but can’t find them hence the age range adjustment.

This certainly isn’t just a Male thing. Take a look at female OLD profiles and it’s equally as grim.

Maybe think "well, if [insert any of the men below who have married women considerably younger than themselves] can do it, why shouldn't I?"

Michael Douglas, Donald Trump, Rupert Murdoch, Jerry Seinfield, Alec Baldwin, Harrison Ford, Steve Martin, Larry King, Clint Eastwood, Nelson Mandela, William Shatner, Kelsey Grammer, Sylvester Stallone, Frank Sinatra, Billy Joel, Warren Beatty, Humphrey Bogart, Robert Duvall, Kevin Costner, David Hasselhoff, Bing Crosby, Anthony Hopkins.... the list is almost endless.

Of course, all of those have or had enormous sums of money which I'm sure has/had no part of it whatsoever.

I think 27 is pushing it, but it’s up to him. If he’s finding people he can relate to that young, and they like it each other then fair enough.

Usual rule divide by 2, add 7 to find lower bound would be 32 as a minimum. I think that’s about right as a general guide....

....But I’ve known a few 25 years olds who mentally are pushing 50, and vice versa. If you like him, message him. His upper bound is fine so he’s not ruling you out

I think if you like the look of him you should contact him. What's to lose?

I really don't get the judgy pants on here. What he's saying is he is open to meeting women who are younger but also the same age. I'd be more sympathetic if he put the upper age range at 55- a few years older than him.

FWIW in the real world, I have a friend who married a widower, when she was 50-ish and he was 70, and he had children and grandchildren.

I also know of friends of a friend where the age difference is reversed- she's 70s and he's 50 -odd and they have been together for a very long time , and are supposedly quite 'normal'.

Usual rule divide by 2, add 7 to find lower bound would be 32 as a minimum. I think that’s about right as a general guide....

I don't know why this rule keeps coming up or where it's from but it's nonsense.

At that rate, I could pull a 38 year old man, and I'm almost an OAP. Oh, hang on...

Anewmonica - because its not about the age gap but the fact he will date someone 22 years younger than him but not 1 year older. Its not saying 'love is ageless', in that case his limit would go both ways. I can think of lots of creepy reasons for a 50 year old man to only date younger women and few good ones.

If youre within his goalposts then apply - be interesting to see if he’s like his pic in real life .