Fucking NYE

[Mississippilessly]

At my MIL's. 15 week old DS. I didn't want to come but DH and I compromised and agreed we wouldn't stay over. We packed stuff 'just in case'. Of course we stayed. DS utterly overwrought. House is full of noisy people. MIL convinced me to stay when I just wanted to go home. She assurer me it woykd be quiet. DS currently asleep in my arms. Stirs when I try to move him. I've managed an hours sleep so far. I've been awake since 4am yesterday. I am on my knees. DH just doesn't seem to get it.
I'm done. I've nothing left. I can't function on this little sleep.

So utterly fed up. Happy fucking new year.

Wake your husband, he can deal with your son while you get some sleep

I don't want to risk waking him. The poor mite has had it rough. Never heard him cry like he did before going to sleep. It's my job to look after him and I have let him down.

Call a taxi.

Fuck that for a game of soldiers love.

rj DS is asleep on me. We live an hour away.
I feel like I've lost my mind.

DH and you didn't compromise did you? He got what he and MIL wanted which was the opposite of you and DS' needs.

Is that because he's an arsehole or are you not asking for what you need?

DS will be fine BTW. He's safe, warm and sleeping.

He agreed to gp home, he packed the car up. But then Mil pursued me.
I didn't want to come. No one is properly listening to me.

Utterly horrible for you- and I know how you feel. It’ll be okay though- DS wont remember this, and it won’t do him any lasting harm.

Maybe a good (early days) lesson in the strength of advocacy you need to deploy for your son- and yourself- with your DH and his family?

They sound like thoughtless cunts, btw.

Look after yourself, lovely.

Chalk it up and remember next year to say that you are staying at home in your pjs with your little one tucked up in bed before you get an invite anywhere else.
Happy New Year!

I'm going to have to leave him in my arms. So no sleep for me. I've had one block of four hrs on Xmas eve. That's the longest for a long time. Last night I got 2 three hr stints which DH says is alright.

Aw love

I didn't realise you were worried about disturbing him or you were so far away.

Are you in a position you could safely try to nap?

Tomorrow your dh deals with baby while you sleep. You need rest to be able to care for him. I'm angry for you.

OP your dh is a twat.
Has he always been like this?

theSheep is he? I'm not sure anymore. I can't think clearly. He did pack the car up when I said I wanted to go.

Where is your dh right now?

He didn’t listen when you told him you didn’t want to go to the party.

He said your sleep (six hours over 3 periods) was enough- when I assume you’ve said how tired you are?

He’s (i assume?) leaving you to care for the baby tonight when you’re on your knees with tiredness.

He is putting his needs before yours and your new baby’s: what do you think?

You're message has actually made me feel really anxious for you. You need more sleep than this. Your job is to look after yourself too.

Asleep at the end of the bed.
I'm going to try getting DS into his crib

DH stayed upstairs with me and DS. I told him to go down otherwise us staying was really completely pointless.
I'm an anxious, teary mess.

He packed the car, but you didn't leave?

No because Mil pursuaded me not to

Really feeling for you...you must be exhausted. Hope you manage to get your little one into the crib and get some sleep xxx

Just put him down, and go downstairs to sleep on the sofa. Dh can settle him

My advice?

Calmly, without confrontation, and only if he’s sober enough to be safe with baby, Wake him up now, and tell him that for the rest of the night he is to look after the baby when/ if it wakes.
Unless baby is breastfeeding- in which case you will feed and he will settle back off.

Tell him he will be on baby duty all day tomorrow either way, whilst you catch up on sleep, at home, in your own bed. You do nothing except feed your child (if you have to).

You’re clearly exhausted and best nip this in the bud now if you can.

your MIL is a twonk here aswell shes had kids she should know bloody better you need to stand up for yourself you really need sleep.

This is something I do regularly. Like my gut tells me one thing but I always value the opinion of others over my own. Like tonight dh said to not take our car so we could both drink, but I thought I'd probably enjoy it more if I had the freedom to go when I pleased and maybe just drink two throughout the whole evening from 5pm to midnight. Lo and behold. Midnight, stone cold sober and desperate for bed, watching our lift miserably sticking it out until 2am and having to wait for when they decided to go. Knew it, why don't I listen to myself?!!

There's a couple of things here. DH is mean about sleep. He needs to take more overnight shifts so he knows how bad it is.

But you need to learn to get what you want. MIL persuaded you because you are persuadable. Don't be. She didn't have a gun to your head, so do what my DM taught me to do. Big smile, "no MIL see you soon... nope, sorry., bye" Bigger smile "not going to happen, love you bye". And repeat.