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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To reclaim an unwanted gift?

206 replies

PersonaNonGarter · 31/12/2018 17:03

For Christmas, we gave DH’s 6yo niece a Lego Friends set (£20) and a nice top (£18). Both bought in advance, non-returnable.

At a family lunch at MIL’s today, BIL returned the Lego set to DH saying DN doesn’t like it and ‘could we exchange it because she doesn’t like Lego Friends’. DH was a bit confused —had forgotten what he’d given— but mumbled something about getting back to BIL. BIL left. The Lego is at MIL’s.

Can we take the Lego back? It’s non-returnable and I’ll give it to someone who wants it. DH thinks we should leave it at MIL’s or send it back to BIL. Who is right?

OP posts:
CajunShrimp · 03/01/2019 21:54

I can’t believe people on here are attacking the OPs choice of gift! That’s not even the point of the thread! I have young (Lego loving) children and I am unaware of the ‘controversy’ of Lego friends.

OP, I think you bought a lovely, thoughtful gift and your BIL was rude to return it in the manner he did, he needs to teach his child to be gracious.

Member984815 · 03/01/2019 22:07

That was so rude , my daughter got a doll and cot from my parents , she's not a doll fan but accepted it and took it home. I wouldn't dream of telling them , take it back and give it to someone who will use it and don't give anything to niece in exchange

IrmaFayLear · 04/01/2019 10:53

After years of getting no acknowledgment of Christmas/birthday presents from dh's dns, I gave them each a writing set containing thank you cards... Sil responded by saying that her dds didn't need to thank people for unsolicited gifts . That was the year that present giving came to an end.

Venus24 · 04/01/2019 11:00

Rude AF
I wouldn’t bother
If we get presents we don’t really like, we are polite and keep them for the local Mission Christmas collection the following year.

CJsGoldfish · 04/01/2019 12:32

My children were taught as soon as they could understand that gifts are a bonus, not the main event. Being with our friends and/or the people we love is the real celebration and if anyone is thoughtful enough to choose a present with them in mind, we never ever respond in a way that may hurt feelings. Was an easy lesson and they are always gracious recipients.
NO WAY would I 'replace' a gift because a child 'didn't like' it. It would just be a case of 'that's a shame' and I'd not mention it again. What's with the greediness and entitlement that a gift should be replaced in that situation. Wrong size, sure. Ungratefulness, no.

Oysterbabe · 04/01/2019 12:37

DD got 2 Catboy cars for Christmas. We took one to Tesco and swapped it for a Gekko mobile, no problem at all.
They were very rude and should have sorted it out themselves.

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