AIBU to ask if your DH watches porn?

[glamglamgirl]

Do you think he does? Does he admit it? My man reckons he doesn't but deep down we both know it's a lie!

Winklemans it was Youporn, I believe. Which was set up for amateur porn but what I wat he’d very blatantly wasn’t. Just what was on their home page, I didn’t look under any catagory.

It was women (very young women, in some cases) being used as a set of orificies. It was vile.

To know that kids can and do ‘educate’ themselves with this stuff is very disturbing.

I definitely think most men HAVE watched porn at some point, and a significant amount of women have, but there are loads and loads who make a conscious decision to not watch it. Its not obligatory, and once you know about some of the problems with the industry, it stops looking sexy pretty quickly.
It doesnt mean you stop being sexual or interested in sex, or you only like vanilla (sorry) , it just means that you can get your rocks off without viewing videos of people being raped.

Massive applause for Branleuse, I couldn’t agree more.

Mine doesn't anymore... but only because he did to the point of obsession and it started interfering with normal life!!

My DH (now age 40) used to once or twice a month up until about 5 years ago, when he mostly lost whatever interest in it he had. A while after that I realised how harmful and toxic porn really was, and dripfed him bits of what I'd learned here and there, and now he's pretty well against it himself. He's always preferred little clips we make of ourselves anyway

Warning - extremely distressing content in this post:

Yesterday I read two horrific news stories - one about a man who murdered his female housemate after developing an obsession with rape porn and deciding to act it out ‘as a birthday present’ to himself and the other about a sixteen year old boy who brutally murdered a fourteen year old girl in a park in order to anally rape her body and leave her displayed naked and humiliated in death for a dog walker to find the next morning.

Now, sadistic sexual predators have always and will always exist, I know. But now they can find clips of their most depraved fantasies widely available on mainstream sites and their hideous desires are validated and normalised. Everyone saying ‘men are just wired that way’ - do you realise what mainstream pornography is like and how this is warping young men? Horrendous violence is being enacted on women and there is a huge market for it. It’s terrifying and the more it is normalised, the worse it is for society.

Also - really bloody horrible, just this week at my child's school it was discovered many of the 10 and 11 year old boys are actively watching porn, when one began harassing a 9 year old female classmate

I saw this article on Twitter just yesterday -

The Children's Mercy Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri says it is seeing a disturbing trend in child sexual assault cases. Children are abusing children.
"I think that was kind of shocking to us all as we were collecting this data, is that almost half of our perpetrators are minors," said Heidi Olson, the Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner Coordinator.
The SANE program's data shows perpetrators are likely to be between 11- and 15-years-old.
"Another thing we're noticing is a lot of those sexual assaults are violent sexual assaults, so they include physical violence in addition to sexual violence," said Jennifer Hansen, a child abuse pediatrician at Children's Mercy.
Victims are most likely girls around 4- to 8-years-old.
Nurses are also finding more and more that pornography is playing a role in these cases.

Oh shit! The link - www.3newsnow.com/news/national/children-abusing-children-missouri-hospital-sees-dangerous-trend-involving-young-kids-and-porn

No he doesn't, he knows it wouldn't bother me if he did and he still doesn't, so I guess that dispels the myth that 'all men do'. When he was younger and single he did and we did together a couple of times earlier on in our relationship, but now he's just not bothered.

Scrumplestiltskin it makes the OP’s wish to ‘giggle’ at men who all, without exception, definitely all watch porn and it’s so funny seem even more time-deaf and stupid, doesn’t it? And all the posters going ‘of course your partner watches porn and lies about it because you’re so uptight, hahaha’ - don’t you give any men the credit to read the overwhelming evidence of the rape, abuse and misery that pornography is inflicting upon women - both the participants and the victims of porn-soaked, twisted male consumers - and choose not to prop up the industry? Do you really think his orgasm is worth all the suffering? Do you think all men believe that?

It most certainly shows up the OP’s description of porn consumption as ‘healthy’ for the lie that it is.

For the OP:

To all those sharing personal information, I'm not sure that this thread is all that it seems, and suggest you advance search the OP with your thinking caps on.

We both do. We have a very active sex live and enjoy both porn and erotic fiction. We’ve been together for 15 years, it’s never caused an issue yet.

Most of OHs friends watch it and are very open about it. I have a couple of friends who think their OHs don’t but they definitely do (have told the other husbands in the friendship groups that they do)

I don’t think ALL men watch it regularly though, our immediate friendship groups are probably about 30 people so a very small cross section of society.

We both do. Occasionally together. Doesn’t bother me.

No he doesn't but I do!

OP has gone, people