Completely shocked by BIL

[kelliejr]

DH and I called round to his sisters house after work at 8.30 to pick up some tools to do DIY in our house. She told us she was putting their 4 year old DS to bed to her DH would be downstairs to answer the door, just knock on the patio.
When her DH answered there was a very strong smell of weed and he had clearly smoked judging by his voice and eyes.
Their DS and SIL heard us knock and called for my DH to come up from the patio to say good night... he told me there was no smell of weed upstairs thankfully. When my DH said to his sister "why the hell is there a smell of weed downstairs?!" She was quite defensive of her DH.

For some reason it's really upset me. To think my SIL was upstairs putting their DS to bed whilst her DH was downstairs smoking weed. I'm just a bit shocked. It's of course not my place to say anything but I could see on my DH's face it upset him too to think our nephew is in that environment.

I have no proof he smoked in the house, but the smell was quite strong so he must of smoked it not long before we called. Both of us are just a bit taken a back and not sure how to feel about it. We also don't know if SIL smokes it or is it just BIL.

Any advice? AIBU to feel annoyed/shocked? Do you think my DH needs to speak to his parents about it?

Please no nasty comments, I'm not on a witch hunt for these people as we have always gotten on well... which is probably why it shocks me more.

People don’t normally start on heroin do they? Stop being obtuse word you know exactly what that means.

I doubt that as I have to drive.
I teach weed smoking dopey boys who’ve been up all night playing fortnite and other rubbish. Stressed and sick of the lack of a sense of right and wrong in society anymore.

You’re being ridiculous op. No, you can’t tell his parents as though he is a naughty little boy. Get a grip.

Marijuana oil is medical. Smoking/eating it isn’t. And yes it’s far stronger now than it was a few decades ago so it does cause paranoia & psychosis! There’s always that person too ‘I don’t drink but I smoke weed’ wow do you want a medal!

I don't think weed is a gateway drug. I know many many weed smokers who just do weed, their dealers only sell weed. Even when I lived in central London and all my friends were dotted about that city, you got the weed smokers and then you got the druggies and the weed smokers kept themselves well away from the druggies.

I was born and bred in London and only left when I was well into my 40s(I'm 60 now), and weed being a gateway drug was never true ime, just a bit of sensationalism and pearl clutching.

Sure, occasionally some coke dealer might have a bit of weed, but honestly, most of them don't, or didn't bother with it; weed didn't carry a big enough profit, was too 'soft' to be worth bothering with. Coke dealers were hard guys. Weed dealers just wanted to chill and make a bit of money.

I know a number of people who used to spout ‘it’s only weed’ many of them now spout ‘it’s only coke’ etc. It seems that drugs are ok as long as it isn’t heroin, meth or black mamba.

You can’t tell who is at risk of psychosis. That’s the point

I think that if they are middle aged and have smoked weed for many years and have never had psychosis then it's very unlikely that they are at risk of psychosis from weed.

In addition to my previous post around I would rather my father smoked weed every night... his wife has suffered with two medically diagnosed stress induced psychosis' due to his alcoholism.
Tit for tat.

Actually I was kind of with you op until you wrote should your husband tell his parents, like you were all twelve or something,

I can't decide what's worse, smoking a joking with young kids in the house, or wanting to go running and telling tales to mummy and daddy and expect them to step in.

I actually think it's the latter,

Doghorsechicken you are incorrect
medical marijuana is available in the form of herbal cannabis it can also be eaten, smoked, vaped

As you say @Mrskeats I do understand what is generally meant by the term gateway drug, I was wondering why you consider cannabis to belong in this category?

For me it hasn't been the gateway to anything and yet you state that it is a gateway drug as if this were a fact

I think it's just your baseless opinion

Anyone on here ever shared a drink or two with OH at home whilst the children are there? Did anyone tell your mum and dad? I would guess a good 50 percent plus of the population either smoke weed or don't have a major panic attack if other people do. Some people have a propensity to develop a psychosis. Others may become alcoholics. Self medication doesn't help either group but prohibition won't prevent it. The large majority will not have these problems.

The way people say your dealer like that’s normal.

50 per cent of the population smoke weed? Give over.

Drug users will always try to justify themselves.

What will you pearl clutchers do when we get legalization
will you have apoplexy or just cat's bum mouth?

I will laugh at everyone who thinks smoking weed is ‘good for you’. Having morals now means you’re a pearl clutcher.

Have a nice day Doghorsechicken

I laugh at doghorsechicken who equates moral with legal.

Well we all have to start somewhere and she may develop a more sophisticated approach in time 🙂

What will you pearl clutchers do when we get legalization

I judge nicotine smokers who smoke in a house with kids. That’s legal. So legalisation of weed would make no difference to how I feel. I would still judge.

I have reduced lung capacity as a result of growing up in a house with a smoking parent.

Reported long how clever you are just mocking people. I assume weed also affects having any social graces at all.

Oh I wish I was cool enough to do drugs