To want her to give the card back?

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DH works in a supermarket and has an employee’s store card which gives him a significant discount. He is also entitled to one additional spouse’s card.

For over 5 years, his mum has been using this card.

DH and I got married 2 years ago. And at first I was happy to just go shopping together to get the discount.

But now we have a DC, I’m getting fed up of having to wait until he’s around to do the weekly shop and would like him to take the card off his mum so that I can use it at my convenience.

However all hell has broken loose with his mum calling me a selfish demanding bitch. She says it’s unreasonable of me to want to take it off her when DH and I can share his card.

Thing is though, I don’t even know if it’s legal for her to be using the card at all. It specifically says it’s for the partner of said cardholder.

AIBU to want DH to take the card off her?

Ooh I like the sound of this one

If the card is for the cardholders partner then that’s the end of the argument!

Can the card be used online? If so just use his discount online or meet him after a shift (go do the shopping he arrives in time to pay/use discount), ultimately it's up to DH who he gives the second card to

cant you just take your husbands card?

The card is for “immediate household members”.

He hasn’t lived with his mum in 15 years

Is there more of a back story for MIL to act like that over giving a card back?

You shouldn't have to but could you not just keep husbands card with you on the days you're planning on going shopping?

I can’t take his card because it’s got his name on it.

I think there was a poster recently who lost her job over a similar scenario, misuse of the store discount card. So yes, I would definitely get it back.

I'm pretty sure I read a thread about a very similar situation and the employee was possibly even sacked due to the misuse of the card by someone else.

I wouldn't take it off my MIL(though I wouldn't give her initially but that is done).

If you do most of the family shop you should have dh card as discount to family will be bigger that his lunch or whatever he uses it for. Or meet him, when my dh had a store discount card for food he would give it to me when I arrived at the shop.

What does your DH say about the situation?

Years ago I worked in a big grocery chain and they'd fire staff for letting people other than the spouse use the discount card.

if prearranging to go with your dh rather than nipping in and out at one’s own convenience is that easy then why can’t she do it?

Back story is that he was a confirmed bachelor and apple of MIL’s eye until we met and got married. I don’t think she ever forgave me for stealing her precious boy.

I work at Asda, the person who uses your additional discount card must live in the same house as you, it’s one of the most common things colleagues are sacked for, they take it very seriously.

I think I read something similar recently about a supermarket card being used by someone outside of the rules and the person lost their job. He and his mum might want to think about that for more than a minute

My sister has hers for her and her DP and then me and my mum use her other on days we go shopping. She cleared this with her manager even though we don't live with her they said as long as it's a family member it's not a big issue who has it.

Can you not share it with MIL and just pick it up on days you shop if you can't take husbands

So if he is not willing to get the card back. The shopping becomes his job.

If dh's mother called me a "selfish demanding bitch" he wouldn't only be taking the bloody discount card off her! He'd be furious.

What is your dh saying about this?

It’s common for people to give their parents/ siblings the card when they don’t have their own family, and that seems to be the case when the card was originally issued. Tbh o don’t think you’re going to win here: your DH can only cancel her card and that seems rather harsh. She does seem crazy but knowing she’s a crazy person doesn’t get you a card either

Can't you just report the card she has as lost/stolen and get it replaced, invalidating hers? Will probably cause more drama but at least you'll have the card

If it has names on, can he just not cancel the additional card, and order a new one... for you. Obviously tell her before she gets to the till and tries to use it though.

Bet me to it yolo

It is most likely a sackable offence his mum having it, he needs to take it back!

My auntie has a discount card for Morrison’s and also got one for a family member which my mother uses as my auntie is not married. The max discount is 20% on special offers but normally it’s 10%. I think it’s abit petty to ask for it back when realistically you won’t really be saving that much.

I used to work for a large well known supermarket. The discount cards can only be used for people living in the same household. My mum still works there but she can't use her card to get me nappies and things as the manager would know she has no small children at home. If the company find out his mum has a card he will lose both cards and his disco t revoked or could even be dismissed

I don’t think you should even start going on about sackable offences and what is and isn’t allowed. She’s had it years. It’s only your husbands job that will suffer from
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