Boss back from maternity leave, who is being unreasonable?

[florafaunaandotherthings1]

Hi. I'm struggling to see who is being unreasonable here. My boss went on maternity leave for 6 months and has now returned. I stepped into her role while she was away and have now returned to my old role. It's an admin/ co-ordination role without going into too much detail. While she was away I made some changes which made everything run more smoothly. She has now returned and after trying the changes for a while she is returning to how she did it before. I am finding it very frustrating as I know the other way was better. I approached our boss but he just said that I'd done a good job and my colleague would keep any changes if they were worth keeping. Hes not really been any help. I'm so frustrated but I don't know what to do!

If she has gone back into her old role, and tried your new suggestions, then she is perfectly reasonable to return to the "old way".

Suck it up.

You think your way is best. She thinks her way is best. Unfortunately for you, she gets final say. There’s nothing you can do except smile and get over it.

You are being unreasonable, everyone works in a different way.

It’s really tough returning from maternity leave. She is maybe feeling a bit territorial about ‘her’ job. She may feel as if you are implying she wasn’t good at her job. I know it must be frustrating, but I would let it go for now and let her settle in. Once she has been back a while she may feel more able to be receptive to the changes.

Your changes don't work for her. She tried it your way, didn't work, it's her choice now. It's hard enough getting back to work after maternity even without changes you don't consider necessary. Let it go.

It’s her job so I think she’s entitled to do it how she wants, even if you don’t agree. I think you just need to let it go.

I think you were a teeny bit cheeky to change how someone else's job is done. And to complain about her when she's just back from
maternity leave is just horrible! It's her job, not yours.

YABVU. She tried your changes, she didn’t like them and didn’t think they were better so she went back to the way she prefers it. As the boss, that is her right.

What works for you won’t work for everyone and clearly doesn’t for her.

Her job, her choice. If you feel that by "acting up" in her role you have gained or developed skills that would suit a more senior position, you could apply for more senior roles both internally or externally and refer to your recent experience in your application. If you choose to remain in your current role, I think you'll have to accept that your colleague can perform her own role as she sees fit.

You have to suck it up. She doesn't like your changes, her choice she's the manager

It's her job. You were just covering it for her. Now she's back, so she can do it how she pleases. If her performance is not as efficient as it could be, that's between her and her manager.

And yes, I also agree you shouldn’t have been making changes in someone else’s job.

You have to either suck it up and stick to your old role or while things are still fresh apply for a new role at her level.

You're probably right. Since when did that make a difference at work? You know you can do the boss' job - look for a better job elsewhere.

In my defence she did say to make any changes I wanted while she was away. She is now being snappy and not very nice when I point out that that's how we do it now.

I agree with everyone else, you should not have made changes in her absence but having done so, it's entirely up to her whether she wishes to revert to her old system. You think your changes are better but she obviously disagrees.

Use what you've done to boost your CV and get a promotion by moving jobs?
It's hard to go back whilst you've been acting up in a role. Sounds like you enjoyed the responsibility - get a job where you can use it

when I point out that that's how we do it now.

I’d be pissed off at this if I was her. . You don’t appear to very diplomatic if that’s what you’ve actually said.

At least she tried your changes for a while first.

In my defence she did say to make any changes I wanted while she was away

Then she's perfectly entitled to change it back on her return. I think you've been really cheeky to point out that "we don't do it this way anymore". She gave you free will to do the job as it suits you. Leave her to do the same, it's her job!

She is now being snappy and not very nice

^ Can't you see why that is, OP? You basically went complaining about her to the big boss has soon as she came back from mat leave. Nice...

YABU, btw.

She is now being snappy and not very nice when I point out that that's how we do it now.

That's very arrogant of you to tell her that and I'm not surprised she is being snappy. It's her job and she will do it as she sees fit. You are either going to have to suck it up or find a new job.

when I point out that that's how we do it now

I’m sure that’s not how you put it! Hopefully not anyway. It is still her job. When she said to make changes she presumably didn’t mean permenant ones.

I’d take it as a compliment that she gave your changes a try. A lot of people would have.

Wouldn’t have!

Wow, you actually told your BOSS that's how you do it now! Who the hell do you think you are!

It's not your job, it's hers. I'd go back to my way on principle with an attitude like yours.