Mumsnet Logo
My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To think she was rude! Trick or Treating, am I a CF?

242 replies

forwhatyouare · 31/10/2018 20:23

Long story short, we went trick or treating as an extended family tonight. About 5 kids in total, including my 1 year old.

I came to the door for every knock (we only knock on decorated houses or those with a few pumpkins), and collected sweets in a bag for my DS.

On one of the knocks, I collected a sweet in the bag and the woman who answered pulled me to the side and said "He looks cute, he's getting these for you though I suppose "

I said "haha", thinking I had mistaken her tone and she was joking. She was not. She said "I saw you eating them from across the road".

If truth be told, I was eating a sweet a little earlier.

AIBU to say this is bloody rude?!

Just give sweets to wherever is dressed up or don't at all. It would be different if I was dressed for Halloween and there alone, but I was standing with DS in my arms, with 4 little children surrounding me... Hardly the cheeky fucker of the century.

OP posts:
Report

angelikacpickles · 31/10/2018 22:17

Oh ffs. I had lots of tinies call here this evening. I couldn't give two hoots who eats the sweets! Having said that, I'm not sure why you are bothered, since you were actually going to be eating them.

Report

weebarra · 31/10/2018 22:20

It's not fucking begging. Up here, it's guising, it's an old tradition, everyone does a turn. I've never taken a child under 3 though.

Report

Kismett · 31/10/2018 22:21

So many people have told me that trick-or-treating wasn't that common here until recently. I spoke to one woman today who told me it's just come in during the last ten years. I appreciate that this might be regional and that they might be referring to specific Halloween traditions. But it's not that Americans are going around assuming we invented anything!

We had nothing but well-mannered children this evening and I'm grateful for that, because I know that's not a universal experience.

Report

Theimpossiblegirl · 31/10/2018 22:26

Doesn't everyone eat the children's sweets once they've gone to bed anyway? :)

Report

Pinkyyy · 31/10/2018 22:29

I mean in all honesty you went to a great deal of trouble to dress the baby up in a non 'bog standard' costume, purely to get sweets for you and your DH. I'd feel bad taking sweets intended for children. You're an adukt- buy your own.

Report

Pinkyyy · 31/10/2018 22:29

Adult*

Report

peachgreen · 31/10/2018 22:35

Very cheeky to collect sweets for a baby!

Report

BackforGood · 31/10/2018 22:37

Glad you've conceded YWBU, and were, in truth, upset that she called you out on it.

Report

StoppinBy · 31/10/2018 22:40

I have never heard it called begging before, seems weird that you would call it that as people are openly inviting you to their home so that they can give you something.

We visited one ladies house yesterday where she was very disappointed as she had had so few visitors, as it's only started to take off here in the last few years the trick or treat friendly houses are fairly spaced out so hers just happened to be on our way home and we stopped as we passed it.

I do think though that if people are taking their kids out they should be leaving something out at home for others to take as well and not just taking from others without giving anything back.

When we got home our cauldron was almost empty (fake spiders/bugs/stickers and lollies) and I was super excited to know we had had visitors while we were out :-) I don't care if parents took something - good for them, saves me eating left over lollies hah.

Report

MamaJune · 31/10/2018 22:55

One of my 'friends' has a 9 year old who she takes trick or treating every year and doesn't let him have a single sweet and eats them all in front of him, it's so sad. She says he's not allowed anything like sweets or chocolate because it's bad for children but will happily fill her face.
YABU though, take your little one out and let him see what's going on and the decorations but if people offer you sweets then take them and share them out with the other kids you were with at the end, or just say no.. certainly don't ask!

Report

Boohissmiss · 31/10/2018 22:58

Kismet it’s been going on way way longer than 10 years. My 40 year old brother trick or treated when he was a kids so over 35years ago me nearly 25 years ago so a long time

Report

plaidlife · 31/10/2018 23:04

I was almost worried the annual mumsnet tradition of stating
Halloween is a crass American import
It is begging
It is a new tradition etc
Wasn't going to happen this year. Thankfully I was wrong.

Report

Kismett · 31/10/2018 23:08

@Boohissmiss I believe you, I’m just repeating what people in my area have told me. I assume different areas have different traditions.

Report

GemmeFatale · 31/10/2018 23:09

Personally my rules on trick or treat are

  • you should only knock on doors where the house is decorated/a pumpkin is out/it is otherwise indicted the household is participating
  • you should know the occupants (I’ll accept neighbour on nodding terms, but I dispise the whole travelling to the ‘better’ areas thing)
  • age appropriate (old enough to enjoy the experience, under 13 unless they’re accompanying younger siblings as the responsible one)


By my count you fail the CF test on two counts.
Report

Katinkka · 31/10/2018 23:10

So what. It’s sweets ffs. Who bloody cares. Silly woman

Report

ShesABelter · 31/10/2018 23:12

I'm 33 and nowhere near as many people go out guising here (trick or treating) as they use to when I was younger..

Also never heard of mischief night either.

Any other Scots heard of this apparent night where teens run round stealing cars 😂

Report

VanGoghsDog · 31/10/2018 23:12

I didn't know anyone who knocked in my door. But that's because I don't know anyone.....

Report

VanGoghsDog · 31/10/2018 23:13

I'm not a Scot and I'm aware of Mischief night, yes.

Report

JamAtkins · 31/10/2018 23:19

I'm American and didn't know the UK is doing Halloween and trick or treating now, or at least they weren't when I was living there

There are a few things that have changed since the 16 century to be fair.

I don’t care who gets the sweets but I know people who get arsey about anyone over the age of about 7, who will be described as ‘great big teenagers’. Bit mean to not let the baby put sweets in a basket when the older kids do and obviously ridiculous to leave the baby home alone.

Report

IvorHughJarrs · 31/10/2018 23:20

I've heard of Mischief Night in Liverpool

Report

Charolais · 31/10/2018 23:22

I'm American and didn't know the UK is doing Halloween and trick or treating now, or at least they weren't when I was living there

I was born and raised in the U.K. and when I lived there they didn't celebrate Halloween with trick or treating. It is an American tradition they have copied. One of many.

My oldest American son (now in his mid-40's) was visiting grandparents in England years ago just as the kids there started to get into Halloween and he was telling the English kids he would shout out when he was T&T here, "Trick or treat, smell my feet".

Report

forwhatyouare · 31/10/2018 23:24

One of my 'friends' has a 9 year old who she takes trick or treating every year and doesn't let him have a single sweet and eats them all in front of him, it's so sad. She says he's not allowed anything like sweets or chocolate because it's bad for children but will happily fill her face.

I'm shocked at that! What?! Poor kid :(

Mine is content with boob for now lol

OP posts:
Report

Aridane · 31/10/2018 23:25

It's fun and it's only miserable buggers who don't take part who says it's begging.

Hell, no - feral teenagers egging doors / windows and cars and shouting abuse at people in the street. Not fun, and if that makes me a miserable bugger, then a miserable bigger I am Grin

Report

Ellapaella · 31/10/2018 23:27

Ha this is so funny.. I would have totally laughed that off and not given it a second thought!

My DC are 16, 7 and 3. We've been out trick or treating every Halloween for the last 10 years. Rules are if someone has a pumpkin lit up outside the house or in window you can knock, if not then you don't go there.
We love Halloween, had a fantastic night tonight. They love dressing up and all the excitement of seeing their friends after dark.

Report

Boohissmiss · 31/10/2018 23:28

Shesabelter

Scottish here and never once heard of mischief night

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Sign up to continue reading

Mumsnet's better when you're logged in. You can customise your experience and access way more features like messaging, watch and hide threads, voting and much more.

Already signed up?