to ask about friendship dealbreakers?

[Tobythecat]

What are your deslbreakers when it comes to friends?

Mine are -

Voting Tory
Disliking animals or being cruel to them
Being judgemental towards mental illness
Being a food snob

Insisting an illness is imaginary and suggesting people could be cured by bucking up.

Not even slightly ashamed to say I ghosted her and never looked back.

I dropped a friend as she was constantly late or cancelling on me at the last minute. The last time she rang to say she was just leaving her house - she should have been at mine 15 mins before and it was a 45 min drive

Racism
Homophobia

I'm not too bothered if people don't like animals as long as they're not cruel.

Voting Tory... not my thing but I wouldn't end a friendship on it! I've nearly ended a couple of friendships due to Brexit.

I love listening to food snobs chatter over lunch as I'm tucking into my pesto pasta.

As long as people live and let live, and respect others' opinions, I like being in the company of people who have different opinions to me.

Disliking dogs - I sympathise if they've had a bad experience but mine are such a huge part of my life it's just not going to work. We're a package deal.

Anyone that won't be friends with someone else based on them having differing mainstream political beliefs.

Lying, I absolutely can't abide liars so would have to seriously rethink a friendship if I'd been lied too

I’m really puzzled by people that can’t get over someone not liking dogs. Don’t you just talk about things other than dogs or meet up in bars, restaurants, etc. where there aren’t always dogs?

Racists
Cheats (relationships, benefits etc)
Liars

One who lets you down all the time and is always late.

I also agree with being judgmental towards mh illness. I work in mental health and have an unwell husband. We just aren't going to get on if you are ignorant and judgmental about it.

The usual racism, homophobia and so on, and someone who was the total opposite of a feminist. My best friend doesn't agree with a lot of my views but she isn't stuck in the 1950s.

Basically, just don't be an arsehole.

A friend on Facebook recently posted an "I'm not racist but..." style rant. Nice woman but great God that made me delete her faster than I've ever deleted anyone before.

So racism. And especially the sort of racism that says "oh but I didn't mean you" because yeah, you did, you're just too gutless to admit to being a big old bigoted arse.

I love dogs. However I'm allergic to the vast majority of them.

Lost friends because I refused to let them bring their dog to my house.

**SchrodingersBox

Anyone that won't be friends with someone else based on them having differing mainstream political beliefs.**

^
This

Being a communist/fascist/racist/religious supremacist
Being cruel to children
Speaking too loudly all the time (I don't dislike people for this but dislike being around loud people)
Being over sensitive/professional offense taker
Stiring drama/bring unnecessarily bitchy all the time

My best friend doesn't like dogs much. Her children are scared of them.

I don't expect her to love them. As long as she isn't cruel to them (which she wouldn't dream of being) then what matters? I love my dogs but they don't come with me everywhere so a friend doesn't need to love them.

As per Schrodinger and PeasPlease

I once had a colleague who I quite liked initially and who I thought had 'friend potential' - until one day, apropos of nothing, they made the most incredibly offensive racist remark.

I dropped them like a hot brick.

I also once 'consciously decoupled' from a former friend who cheated constantly on their partner. It wasn't a moral judgement per se, but when they started trying to drag ME in and to try to persuade me to lie on their behalf, I noped out.

Flat earthers. Trump supporters.

Buh-bye...

Wanting to bring their kids to everything. Byeee!

I mainly leave friendships because of intolerance. It boils down to the fact that although I can certainly along with almost anyone I can't tolerate people who refuse to see other points of view.

Obviously this includes racism, homophobia and excessive lateness or unreliability.

My partner has ASD. So he's particularly outspoken about these subjects, most people don't like the truth if they are in fact intolerant.

Drink driving. Repeatedly. With her kids in the car 😡😡😡
Apparently it's normal in Czech

One who lives life through negative tinted glasses. Never has anything positive to say, moans constantly, tells little lies for no reason, slags other friends off behind their backs, is in thousands of pounds of debt but still can treat herself every other day to new clothes then moans she's in debt, I really could go on but I've said more than enough 😂

Drug dealer
Rapist
Murderer
Child abuser

Just that kind of thing. Literally none of the others that have been mentioned. Not because I minimise the issues but because I just wouldn't feel the need to disassociate myself from someone because of their thoughts. I love a good argument and would be permanently trying to change them but I'd still be their friend.

I've just broken off a friendship of over 7 years due to constantly feeling used. I.e lending money and having to plead for it back, being let down when asking for a favour despite bending over backwards for her, realising the foundation of our relationship is her asking me for advice/ favours and the straw that broke the camel's back was her looking her temper at me for being annoyed at a mutual friend (only known for 2 yrs) even though the friend was completely in the wrong she sided with them and I was called moody and arrogant for complaining!

Conversation monopolisers. All
Me me me.

I value listening skills.

Being 'showy' with money
Intolerance of others views or lifestyle choices
Snobbery
Racism
Sexism
Homophobia
Taking self to seriously