To have told DH to stop talking?

[seasidewitchtits]

He's been out all day having a 'much needed creative day' - visiting museums and meeting a friend for lunch.

I've been at home with 4 month old and autistic 4yo (and PND) all day, where the only break I got was 20 seconds to urinate before the 4mo kicked off and the 4yo started crying for me. I ate my lunch whilst constantly agitating a bouncer with my foot. It took four separate attempts to hang out one load of washing.

DH has just said 'Ooh I am tired tonight, today's been sooo busy' and, while I have often thought about telling him to shut up in similar situations, tonight I actually did!

He's huffed off to bed now and I'm downstairs waiting to dreamfeed the 4mo. I feel like I've done something wrong, but I don't feel a bit guilty or like apologising. AIBU to feel this way?

When's your creative day?

When is your day off?

I don't get a creative day. It's not important for my creative juices to flow because they don't earn us any money or help children to stay alive.

Not unreasonable at all. Sending hugs & flowers

Creative day?? He must be having a laugh. Next available opportunity hand him there kids and fuck off for the day!!

Quite important to keep you sane and functioning though, is it not?

Your last post is literally the same boat I’m in with my 4MO and Partner. It’s shit isn’t it.

YADNBU.

YANBU. Creative day my arse.

creative day - really? Is he always a useless arse

It's interesting how it works though. A friend from afar calls and says do you want to meet them in the city for lunch. You say yes. Yet it wouldn't ever enter his head that I might go without the kids. And it would never enter his head that he should go with them.

What the fucks a creative day?

Just tell him you’re having a creative day or whatever. And go out and leave him with his children. They are his, too, after all.

A creative day indeed! Christ, I'd be taking my own creative day, pronto! He's a CF

it wouldn't ever enter his head that I might go without the kids. And it would never enter his head that he should go with them

Totally agree !

I left him for ten minutes to have a shit on Saturday. The baby got hungry and cried. DS started to cry. DH freaked and sat in a semi comatose state for ten minutes because of how 'intense' that was.

Oh, tell him to sod off. Telling him to shut up was pretty mild. My OH does this. Constantly talking about how he needs time off because parenting is so relentless. Only he doesn't do most of the parenting. I do. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. What is it with these men?!

why didnt you stamp your feet op, and demand if he was going to museums, he takings the fecking 4 year old with him

He has a creative job, that's as much as I'll reveal about that. A well paid, self employed, often WFH creative job. So I can see why he might think 'why not visit X museum while I'm in the city' - but not to then fucking complain about how tired he is!

You're a hero. He's an idiot.

What the fuck?!!!!!!

How on earth does he feel entitled to take a creative day when you have that to deal with?!!!

I have a young child with autism and if I had a young baby as well I would be ready to jump out of the window. I would be livid with your dh.

What a snowflake.
He presumably had a very active and critical part in the conception of BOTH your children.
Time for the navel gazing to stop.

YADNBU
💐

I feel like I really NEED DH to see what a whole day with sole responsibility for both kids looks like, but I feel like if I tried to take a day he'd view it as an aggressive act.

So what if he sees it as ‘an agressive act’. What would happen if you just left one morning without the kids and turned your phone off till you’d finished with you’re creative day and then returned at your own leisurely pace?

He sounds like a horrible pretentious git.

I'm sorry, but I genuinely LOLed at the thought of your H in a semi-comatose state because two children crying was so intense 😀.

Is your relationship generally OK?