AIBU?
Holiday fall out
Starleaf · 26/09/2018 18:32
Ok so I'm on holiday abroad with a friend and her two late teen children. It was my friends birthday yesterday, I packed birthday banners and ordered a cake and a bottle of fizz for her from the hotel. We went on a special day trip that I knew she wanted to do. Got back to hotel got ready for dinner and a night out, maybe a dance bar. All good so far. We had a lovely meal and decided to have a walk and find a bar. We passed several that were either showing football or boxing. Almost at the end of the strip we came to a place that was busy, playing music with people dancing. Just as we went in a song I love came on and I went to dance beckoning for my friend to follow. She didn't so when the song finished I went back to join her and asked if she'd like a drink. She said she didn't like the bar and was leaving.
I'll admit I wad pissed off at this point and walked out with my friend and kids following. I didn't walk fast but she hung back and the three of them stopped at a market, so I was on my own. I got back to our room (2 bed apt) and went to the bathroom. When I came out one of her kids was sleeping in her bed, and she'd gone to the other bedroom. I asked her why and she suddenly became very angry. She said as it was her birthday I should have done everything she wanted.
She has since told me she doesn't want anything more to do with me, I spoiled her birthday and that our friendship is finished.
I told her she was behaving immaturely. We haven't really spoken since, and they've now gone out for dinner leaving me in the room.
AIBU to think she'd had the whole day doing what she wanted, could she not have stayed at the bar for one drink, and has she over reacted?
MrsStrowman · 26/09/2018 18:35
Given it's her birthday and she has her children with her did you not even ask her what she wanted to do tonight? Going to a dance bar probably isn't ideal with children in tow.
QueenNovo · 26/09/2018 18:36
You both over reacted, you by storming out of the bar and her by being a drama llama over her birthday.
SneakyGremlins · 26/09/2018 18:37
She said as it was her birthday I should have done everything she wanted
Happy 7th birthday to your friend, OP.
allthgoodusernamesaretaken · 26/09/2018 18:37
I'd be interested to hear your friend's version of this story
WhenIWasAYoungWarthog · 26/09/2018 18:39
Had she said she wanted to go and look for a bar? The idea of going dancing in a bar with my mum as a teenager (or even now for that matter!) is pretty horrific. Was there something she’d specifically wanted to do and it wasn’t done?
She’s massively overreacting either way. If she didn’t want to do what you suggested she should’ve said something rather than sulked.
cheesefield · 26/09/2018 18:39
Hmm. Had she had a lovely day up until then? No weird atmosphere? It sounds like she was pissed off before the bar incident.
cheesefield · 26/09/2018 18:41
Or was she just knackered or hungover already?
Sometimes group holidays don't bring out the best in people.
Could she have thought you were dominating her day?
Bombardier25966 · 26/09/2018 18:42
I'd like to know her side of the story too. Did you ask her what she wanted to do? Did the kids want to spend the night in a dance bar?
MarthaArthur · 26/09/2018 18:42
Is this the whole story?
So you stormed off and how long were you in the bathroom for that she managed to get home with the kids and get one to sleep?!
peachgreen · 26/09/2018 18:48
From her perspective you dragged her to a bar she didn't want to go to on her birthday and then stormed off back to the hotel when she said she wanted to leave.
Havaina · 26/09/2018 18:50
I wonder if she thinks you are tagging along on her and her children's holiday? They are the dominant party in this situation.
When can you escape and go home? Can you afford to move to a hotel or get an earlier flight home?
SoyDora · 26/09/2018 18:51
Why were you pissed off (enough to storm out of the bar) because she didn’t want to dance to a song?
FlibbertyGiblets · 26/09/2018 18:51
I don't understand why you went mad and stormed off (slowly). Did you have a few pina coladas under your belt or something?
Havaina · 26/09/2018 18:52
People saying OP dragged her into a bar is wrong, OP says they all went in. We don't know who suggested it and who agreed.
If the friend didn't like the bar she should have communicated that to OP like an adult.
Havaina · 26/09/2018 18:54
Why were you pissed off (enough to storm out of the bar) because she didn’t want to dance to a song?
Posts like these are the reason why OPs abandon threads. OP didn't storm out of the bar, the friend said she was leaving. It sounds like OP followed her out.
People are derailing the thread by deliberately misunderstanding OP.
Celestia26 · 26/09/2018 18:56
I know this isn't the point of the thread, but you already went for dinner. Why have they gone for dinner again?
Also think there is more to this story. People don't react this way normally (both you and her) unless there is a backstory or you are leaving something out......
Fiffyshadesofgreymatter · 26/09/2018 18:58
Yeah... we are not getting the full story here. So, you all happily went looking for a bar, chose one and all you did was dance to one song and she's gone bat-shit on you? It's just not believable. Something else happened. Or she said something before the bar and you went in anyway or something. Need her side of the story here.
Celestia26 · 26/09/2018 18:58
Sorry, just reread your post, this blow up happened yesterday!
ScarlettDarling · 26/09/2018 18:59
Celestia, they went for dinner yesterday on the friend's birthday. Now, today, the friend and her dc have gone for dinner without the op.
HardofCleaning · 26/09/2018 19:00
As PP said she very clearly didn't storm out of the bar, her friend decided to leave and she followed. She does sound like a diva OP.
mypointofview · 26/09/2018 19:01
Was it not very rude of you to strop off and spoil her birthday evening with a huff? She just wanted to leave. She's allowed to leave. Why is she making accommodations for you on her birthday - shouldn't it be the other way around? If you have made a completely unnecessary scene and sulked off back to the hotel on her special evening, I wonder just how difficult you are generally. This could be the last straw.
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