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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asked to leave Gym cafe lounge for breastfeeding ?!

560 replies

Arewereallyhere · 09/09/2018 22:16

I was at the gyms lounge / cafe as we’d been for a family swim. Big mainstream private gym. DH was with me.

Baby needed a feed but there were lots of people on all the sofas, which are next to main entrance, so I went to a back bit where there were lots of empty sofas and only one lady sitting texting.
I fed baby with my back to the wall, under a blanket thing and DH was opposite me. Baby was super quiet. No crying , no squeaking, nothing.

A weird man came up to us and asked us to leave as there was an ‘adults only sign’. DH said no as the baby was being quiet and surely sign didn’t apply. Man insisted so DH told him to get staff to settle the matter. Man came back with a bloke who worked there and the staffer apologised but said we had to leave as it was adults only. I said it was ridiculous and clearly because I was breastfeeding. I pointed out that the baby was literally silent. The staffer said he appreciated I probably had wanted privacy but I couldn’t sit there.

The other seating area was a)full of people and I would have had to share a sofa to feed my baby and b) next to main entrance so in full view and I feel a bit self conscious there.

The ‘adults only’ area is right at the back so very quiet and discreet.

We left .

AIBU or are they?

OP posts:
TaggieRR · 09/09/2018 22:19

I’d say ywbu- it’s adult only.

LovelyRitaMeterMaid · 09/09/2018 22:19

You weren’t really asked to leave because you were breastfeeding - you were asked to leave because it was an adults only area and you had a baby with you.

PurpleDaisies · 09/09/2018 22:19

It sounds like the breastfeeding thing is a red herring here, it was the presence of a baby in an adults only full stop. You would have been asked to leave if they were being formula fed or sleeping.

pinkdelight · 09/09/2018 22:19

I'm all for bf but adults only is pretty clearly not including babies however quiet, so not sure why it doesn't apply? Must've been other seating areas (in your car?) or could've asked someone to please move?

Original poster
Arewereallyhere · 09/09/2018 22:21

They could have used their discretion. Clearly the aim is to not have kids running around disturbing the peace.

OP posts:
mumtomaxwell · 09/09/2018 22:21

Seriously??? This has absolutely fuck all to do with how you were feeding your child. The point is you took a baby into an adults only area.

YABU.

Glumglowworm · 09/09/2018 22:21

YABU

you weren’t asked to move because you were breastfeeding. You were asked to move because you had a baby in an adults only area.

Original poster
Arewereallyhere · 09/09/2018 22:22

pinkdelight I shouldn’t have to breastfeed in my car?! If there is an empty area and the baby is literally silent

OP posts:
Aeroflotgirl · 09/09/2018 22:22

I agree, it wasent about the breastfeeding, but you weren't allowed to bring a baby into an adult area. You could ask where you can feed the baby.

Lazypuppy · 09/09/2018 22:22

Ywbu, it was adults only. This has nothing do with breastfeeding

Original poster
Arewereallyhere · 09/09/2018 22:23

The two areas are side by side . There is not even a door between them. It it literally two lots of sofas side by side

OP posts:
Scrumptiousbears · 09/09/2018 22:23

Where do they draw the line though? Breast feeding baby. Baby asleep. Toddler asleep. Toddler not asleep but quiet. It's black and white. Adults only then there's no ambiguity.

GreenMeerkat · 09/09/2018 22:23

YABU. Please don't turn this into another fake anti-breastfeeding story. You were asked to leave because you took a baby into and adults only area. Whether you were BF or not is totally irrelevant.

PurpleDaisies · 09/09/2018 22:23

They could have used their discretion. Clearly the aim is to not have kids running around disturbing the peace.

The aim doesn’t matter-you had a child in the adult area.

It’s interesting that you chose to frame this as “asked to move for breastfeeding”.

RiverTam · 09/09/2018 22:23

You weren’t asked to leave because you were breastfeeding though! I appreciate it was annoying but that is simply untrue.

I must say I’ve never seen an adult’s only lounge area in a gym before but if that’s what it was and there was other seating then you should have sat there. I very much doubt anyone on the same sofa would have cared or even noticed you were bfing (though imo those covers simply draw more attention to you).

Lazypuppy · 09/09/2018 22:23

What's wrong with breastfeeding in a car? I did it loads, much easier half the time for the 10mins baby took to feed

Timeisslippingaway · 09/09/2018 22:24

Your baby may have been quiet at that point but it takes a split second for a baby to start screaming so I'm affraid I think ywbu. Adults only means no children however old, don't think it had anything to do with breastfeeding.

welshweasel · 09/09/2018 22:24

YWBU - don’t take your baby into an adult only area! I don’t really understand why you took the baby to the gym if you weren’t happy to feed in public? I’m sure no one would have minded you sharing their sofa!

DearMrDilkington · 09/09/2018 22:25

Yabu

It's completely irrelevant that you were breastfeeding.

Onehellofaride · 09/09/2018 22:25

Agree with above posts nothing to do with bf but having a baby in an adult area quiet or not. YABU

delilahswishes · 09/09/2018 22:25

Sorry YABU. You sound a little like those stories in the press to be honest. The breastfeeding is not at all why you were asked to leave, if its adults only then a baby is still "not allowed".

I'm suprised they didn't let you finish feeding or find you somewhere else to move to though, but if you have chosen to sit in an adults only section you wouldn't expect there to be children of any description.

Sparklingbrook · 09/09/2018 22:25

There was a baby in the adults only area. End of story.

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 09/09/2018 22:25

Was this David Lloyd?

You were asked to leave because of the adults only rule, not the breastfeeding. It is annoying that they couldn’t let you stay but as a previous poster said, they have to make it black and white.

butlerswharf · 09/09/2018 22:26

Misleading title.

Onehellofaride · 09/09/2018 22:26

My DS is 11. He would sit silently and play on his phone. Should he be allowed in because he is making no noise?

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