to book in to a hotel on my own...

[HaveSomeGrace]

and leave my husband and kids at home alone? I’m desperate for time on my own. If I don’t get it I think I might crack. It would be a massive inconvenience for my husband and my kids wouldn’t want me to go. I want to be selfish just once but no one irl would understand. I mean for weekend though, not like week or anything extravagant.

🙁

Would your husband like to get away from you and the kids, would you be happy for him to do this?.

What Vicky said. Sounds good. As long as you are happy for your husband to get his own weekend away when he needs it.

Love Edinburgh but damn, what I wouldn't give to have a thirty quid Premier Inn on my doorstep.

I just piss off to York twice a year.

Yanbu

I've done this before too and was the recharge I needed and everyone benefitted!

Just for the people who missed it, the OP has stated that her husband has a very active and time consuming social life of his own.

@Vicky1990
@VivaLaVieBoheme

My husband regularly leaves us home without him. He socialises a lot without us. As I said up thread, he’s socialising tonight, won’t be back till 3am (I get up for work at 5.15am on a Saturday) and will be socialising tomorrow night too. Repeat pretty much every Fri/Sat. I do not have this, so to book 2 nights away from home and leave him in sole charge of the children for 2 nights isn’t, I don’t think, too much to ask for?

Can’t do a spa, that involves seeing people and I could literally do with 2 days with no communication from the outside world.

Ah, but spa treatments don't require much communication, you can't talk much during a facial and I've heard that loads of people fall asleep during massages, so you're clearly not expected to be nattering.

Somewhere with a nice pool would be good too, as you can swim a few laps and the exercise makes you feel virtuous when you guzzle food/wine later on...can you tell I've done this?

Nope, definitely isn't. Sorry I missed that. You both deserve a break occasionally. Sounds like it is your turn! Hope you have a nice weekend.

YANBU. You should go somewhere nice.

Maybe something like this www.winghall.co.uk/shepherds-huts.html

You might be able to haggle on the price if they're not booked up. I've never stayed btw happened upon it recently looking for something else entirely!

I dream about this all the time.... a day just myself with no mummy every 5 minutes or DP asking where everything is. Like I said just a dream......

Go for it! You will love yourself more for doing it. They will be fine! Enjoy

I fantasised about this constantly and was very close to doing it a few times. But then I got divorced and have EOW to do this. YANBU

It doesn’t sound like you have an equally load OP. do it and enjoy.

Go for it.

Your dp isn’t abusive is he?

@Sarahandduck18

He would say nit but other might not agree. Abuse isn’t just physical though is it.

I often dream of doing this. For all of us here, but of course for yourself, DO IT OP! Then put pictures up so we can see what a lovely time you've had. You deserve it x

OP your husband's behaviour sounds hellish and unreasonable. Most of us crave time away, many of us are luck enough to get it and we all deserve it.

I am sorry that you are in this situation.

Could you book a weekend off work and stay in a hotel for that weekend? I'm thinking your DH does a bit of childcare whilst you working weekends so you could build on that.

You are so tired and unsupported that you seem to be doubting that your needs are as valid as your DH's.

Your husband sounds like a vile entitled idiot.

Please go away by your self - you don’t need his permission.

I'm doing this in January. I spend all of December making Christmas amazing for everyone (which I love doing) so the week after New Year I'm off for a couple of nights.

Do it. Recharge. Enjoy. Then tackle the other issues when you get back.

“No babies, aged 4-12 though. Husband would be inconvenienced as it would impede on his own social life. I don’t have that luxury.”

That’s a point in the “For” column, not the “Against” as far as I’m concerned.

Go for it OP. Don’t ask. Just book it.

I did it last month. Left the family to it. Switched off my phone, checked into hotel, went to the cinema on my own, ate TWO macdonalds burgers then went back to hotel to sit in bubble bath with box of chocolates. The house and family were still there when I got home fully rested the next day. Bliss! I do feel dirty about the burgers though

I say do it take time out maybe go to a spa hotel everyone needs quiet time nothing to feel guilty about at all

We did split holidays this year to cover August as the holiday here is so long. I was home and at work alone for two weeks and it was frankly bloody wonderful to have two whole weeks of proper sleep, exercise, watching my TV and drinking a glass of wine/eating breakfast in peace. More relaxing than my actual holiday with the kids center though I was at work forty hours a week!

I think yes you should do it for your mental health and your husband will appreciate all that you do being on his own. Win win all round.

Do it op.
My DH takes our two children for camping weekends every now and again. I stay at home as I feel it's valuable bonding time for them all.
The fact I get two or three nights by myself, the chance to watch what TV I like, not having to listen to Muuuumeee on repeat, and I get the luxury ready meals from M&S so I don't even have to cook...
Actually that's the whole point really.

Last year DH took himself off for 5 days camping on his own. I was happy about this, he needed the break.
I'm now thinking about a weekend away myself, finance allowing. Possibly in the new year.
It's part of a healthy relationship I think. You need time to mentally recharge, especially once children are involved.