WIBU to bin off this holiday early?

[Ivygarden]

For the last few years, me and my DS (4) and DD (2) have holidayed with my DM and DSis and my DNep (6). Every year I vow not to do it again but the children love it so here we are (on a self catering holiday by the seaside).
Basically, every year my sister adopts the role of mother hen and always takes it upon herself to do the washing, tidying, organising (and being a total martyr about it!). My DM and DSis and nephew always travel together in one car throughout the week, including long journey here and back home again. Because of this, DM and DSis are quite often together, making arrangements etc that I’m not aware of (I’m always on the back foot and anything I suggest is instantly dismissed as they have already discussed the itinary etc). My DD (2) is ridiculously clingy to me. My son and nephew are usually playing together and, as I have my daughter permanently glued to me, my sister usually tends to watch the boys (ie puts them to bed whilst I put my daughter to bed). Although this is helpful, it is not necessarily what I would want as I would like to do more with my DS, but again, she takes it upon herself (in her martyr-like way).

Fast forward to now...I just overheard them slagging me off in the garden implying that I’m lazy and saying things like, “oh perhaps she’s actually looking after her own kids for once”, “good job she doesn’t have more than two”, “she might even be doing her own washing etc”.

Honestly, I just feel like going home. My DS has turned into a dick since arriving as he copies my nephew. I’m the bad guy, always reprimanding my son as I know he wouldn’t be so silly at home but my sister then says, “oh isn’t she boring?” to the children and I hear her threatening to tell me when the boys are misbehaving (God forbid).

My DM pays for the house every year. They are already discussing next year’s holiday (I do not want to go). I also don’t want to say that I over heard them and cause a confrontation but I now feel like going home (but shame for the children - this will be their only holiday). I will certainly make sure I’ve turned the washing machine on / unloaded the dishwasher first. What shall I do? Feel utterly miserable.

Go home, and I’d tell them why.

sorry you’re having a shitty holiday.

Go home, and I would tell them exactly why as well

How much more of the holiday is left?

I’d go home and tell them why with icy calm.

Tell them what you heard, and decide whether you're going home based on their reaction.

I'd try to stick it out this year for the sake of family harmony. But definitely don't go again next year!

I would go home too, life it too short ! I would let them know why as well, and say you are not going away with them next year either.

What a cow. Just tell her you overheard and go home. She’s completely taking the piss out of you.

Another one saying go home. I would tell them why, too. And don't go next year.

How awful, go home and spend some quality time with your little ones, nobody should feel like that especially with family

They are complete dicks! I'm sorry op.

If you don't want to go for the nuclear option of going home, at least go for a couple of outings with just your own DC (I.e. not with family). Don't tell them before you go. If they query it then say you fancied spending some time with just your two children for a change, and make sure to say you'll have dinner out (even if it's only chips) so no need to cook for you and DC. That might be PA enough for them to get it.

Thank you for your quick replies. Perhaps I have been lazy (not in a lounging around kind of way but in a preoccupied with two small children kind of way) so I guess I have let my sister do the washing etc.

The exact same thing happened to me on a family holiday. Mother and sister bossed me about and then slagged me off in the same way. They took control of the kitchen so i looked after the kids. Basically they are bullies when together. We had a massive confrontation there and then . I would let them know you heard but try and stick out for kids but don't go again. Since then i never went on holiday with mum and sister together ever again.

@LaContessa, I did think of doing something like this. Maybe I might tomorrow, if I’m brave enough.

Pack up and leave. And calmly say why.

Family shouldn't treat you like that. It's horrid behaviour .

Also, hide your dirty clothes or say 'I'd rather sort them out myself, thanks'. Resist all attempts to make you hand them over.

It sounds like they are mean to you in order to feel better about themselves. What a sad way to live.

Definitely go home!

X-posted - go for it!

If you're in Pembrokeshire I can recommend some places

@Sharona
We go home on Friday

Sounds painful. I wouldn't leave but don't ever do it again!

If you decide to stay, I’d subtly take back control. ‘No thanks, I’d rather do our washing - please leave it.’ ‘Oh DSis, leave that washing up for ten minutes, I’ll do it when DD’s asleep.’ ‘I want to spend some quality time with the kids today - we’re heading out on our own, we’ll see you at teatime.’

I wouldn't get angry, but I would leave & tell them, very calmly, why you are leaving, and why you won't ever be coming again.

Contessa has it right. Plenty of “I don’t want anyone having to look after me or mine, please don’t wash our clothes/cook for us etc”

Ooh I’d wait till the morning but pack now.
I would then tell them your leaving and exactly why.
I would also tell them to count you out of any holidays, trips etc.