To not pay my sister back?

[GunpowderGelatine]

We were meant to be going on holiday to Spain at the weekend with the four of us (me DH DD and DS) and also our teenage niece. My son now has to have surgery on his arm after breaking it a couple of weeks ago - it turns out the break was much worse than they first thought. So as a result we can't go on holiday 😢 before anyone asks I don't want to send DD and DN with one of us as I really don't think it would be an enjoyable holiday with half the people there and half the people here in hospital.

I've claimed on our insurance, which is all year round insurance I've had for donkeys years. We cannot claim for DN as she is not a member of our household. I told my sister this, thinking that she'd have sorted insurance. She hasn't, so they will lose £450. My sister thinks we should pay this back to them out of the holiday money that's coming back to us, but I've said sorry it can't be helped but she should have taken out insurance. We have now fallen out. WIBU? We want to rebook for October half term and could do without giving her £450 on top of this!

Someone should have bought insurance for dn. it's a tricky one. Can you go halves?

No you should not pay. That's what insurance is for - she should have arranged that herself for her DD to cover themselves in case something like this happened. Do not give her £450. It'll be a lesson learned for her to have insurance in future.

Oh dear, so you discussed dn requiring insurance before booking the holiday but your sister didn't do it?

Depends if you specifically said to your sis "we have travel insurance through X so you need to sort your own" otherwise she may have been unaware DN wasn't insured on your policy. If she was warned and didn't then YANBU if she wasn't warned then YABU and should at least pay half

Holy I didn't discuss it I just booked it on the agreement that she was coming with us, TBH I didn't think I'd have to when she's not my child!

I forwarded the booking form which stipulates no insurance was taken out, but I didn't specifically say "we have insurance for us lot, you need some for DN"

If you like her, go in half, otherwise you could be seen as rubbing her nose in it.

Tbh in those circumstances I'd split the cost. You should have told your sister that you already had pre-existing insurance for your family unit so wouldn't be taking holiday insurance out. I can't believe you were about to go on holiday with a teenager without ensuring they were covered - if that had been your DN while you were away then it would have cost you all a fortune!

To be honest then it seems a bit of a grey area where you both thought each other was sorting it out without actually clarifying it.

I'd offer her £100 or so as an olive branch.

Hope your boy recovers ok from the surgery.

What lala said

Actually, they haven't lost £450. They would not have it if the niece had gone on the holiday, Its already spent

I'd be really pissed off if I was her. Would insurance even pay out in this scenario, as the holiday hasn't been cancelled unavoidably, you've just decided not to go?

I would at least go halves as well. You should have been a lot clearer that you all had seperate insurance, and your niece was not included. If you booked it, it’s not unreasonable of your sister to think you would have taken insurance out for all members of the holiday.

It was your sister's responsibility to take out insurance for her daughter. I have done this for my own DCs when they have travelled without us. Do not pay her back. Was she really going to send her DD on holiday abroad with no insurance?

What Esmee said

My sister didn't think I'd sorted her insurance. She just hadn't sorted it herself. TBH my sister is a grown woman who's been on holidays many times I didn't think I'd need to spell it out to her. I feel awful though, looking at what I can book for October half term, if it's cheap enough we will just pay for DN's holiday for then. I think that would be a nice compromise! But I don't want to be £450 out of pocket

Sorry maybe I'm being a bit thick. The niece is your sisters daughter? If so why is the niece your responsibility if your sister was travelling aswell?

Would insurance even pay out in this scenario, as the holiday hasn't been cancelled unavoidably, you've just decided not to go

My son isn't even 2 and he needs surgery this week - hardly deciding we can't be areas going

*arsed

For future family harmony, go halves - as everyone is losing out so a bit unfair that only the sister isn't reimbursed.

Is it worth the alternative bad feeling? Thank goodness your child is fine, that's what's important

There was a very similar thread recently, I saw it at the beginning so don't know want the concensus was but might be worth looking up.

She could have still went on the holiday with at least one of you's, it was your choice to cancel the holiday entirely at that point.

I agree with Hada.

It should be cheaper in October than an August holiday so I'd think taking her in October instead of now should be enough to keep everyone happy.

TBH I didn't think I'd have to when she's not my child!

But she's not your child and you were taking her on holiday! Would you also say she's not your child so you're not responsible for her safety on holiday?

Who wanted to DN to go with you? I.e. Did you ask DN to come or did DM or sis ask if she could come?

If it's the former, you should go halves because you didn't tell sis to get insurance and if it's the latter then sis shouldn't expect you to compensate her.