To not pay my sister back?

[GunpowderGelatine]

We were meant to be going on holiday to Spain at the weekend with the four of us (me DH DD and DS) and also our teenage niece. My son now has to have surgery on his arm after breaking it a couple of weeks ago - it turns out the break was much worse than they first thought. So as a result we can't go on holiday 😢 before anyone asks I don't want to send DD and DN with one of us as I really don't think it would be an enjoyable holiday with half the people there and half the people here in hospital.

I've claimed on our insurance, which is all year round insurance I've had for donkeys years. We cannot claim for DN as she is not a member of our household. I told my sister this, thinking that she'd have sorted insurance. She hasn't, so they will lose £450. My sister thinks we should pay this back to them out of the holiday money that's coming back to us, but I've said sorry it can't be helped but she should have taken out insurance. We have now fallen out. WIBU? We want to rebook for October half term and could do without giving her £450 on top of this!

Really glad it is sorted!

Whenever I have been on a holiday with people from more than one family, the person organising it (usually me tbh) makes sure that everyone is insured.

This is the second thread that has had a similar theme - I do think it's much easier if everyone is on the same policy, as it makes it MUCH more straightforward if an issue occurs that affects more than one person or family - such as this.

Hope all goes well with your son's surgery, and you have an amazing trip in October! (good luck with the DN that is prone to Kevin-style tantrums...)

Just read the whole thread. Glad to see it was all sorted and that you and your sister had made up - I was feeling quite sorry for her when reading the first few pages.

dd is an only child so we have taken one of her friends on holiday with us a few times. We always talk to her parents in advance so we are all agreed who is responsible for paying for what - including insurance.

I can't blame your sister for assuming that you'd sorted the insurance unless you explicitly said that she would need to organise it for your niece. And even if she had taken out insurance you didn't have to cancel the holiday so the insurance might not have covered the cancellation.

I hope your little boy is better soon, that the surgery goes well and you all enjoy the rearranged holiday.

Now that's all sorted amicably even before I managed to tell you my wonderful advice, that would have made everything better bollox, I would like to wish your DS a speedy recovery.

That isn't how it works. .Insurance kicks in when there is no one to claim the loss from.If someone prangs your car, your own insurance doesn't pay out.

You caused the loss to her because you chose not to continue with the hoiday (for reasons I totally get) but nevertheless your doing.

I am not really sure whether even if she had insurance they would have paid out because someone on a different policy chose to cancel

Glad you are all sorted OP. Just a note re the insurance, I have annual insurance and we took my friends DS away with us this year but we were unable to add him to ours as we were not his guardians and most places wouldn't just sell a child's policy. My friend did manage it eventually but I am not sure how, think there are just fewer places that would do it and we couldn't book for him, it had to be in my friends name with him added on. To comment on your OP, we would not have considered getting him insurance, my friend raised it immediately.

We also got stopped at the airport on the way home for a letter stating he was allowed to travel with us (kind of pointless coming home) and stupidly I did not know we had to have one (travel agent didn't mention it when we added him on extra). It was all very embarrassing, I felt daft as I was sure after the event that I had actually heard before that you needed one but I just didn't think of it.

I should have said, we already had insurance and tried to add him at a later date, that may have been the issue.

Also, it may be worth mentioning to your sister that she should take out insurance the day a holiday is booked to ensure that cancellation is covered.

I am not sure you could have had her on your insurance. We took out separate insurance for DS girlfriend when she came with us but we had annual insurance.
Insurance might also not have paid out if she could still have gone by herself.

I think you are better trying to sort it out, than having a major fall out with your family. If both families stand £225 each to sort it, it's not too unreasonable, is it?

Did you discuss what you would do with your sister before cancelling? Maybe your sister would have looked after your son, and the 2 girls would still have had a great time with you, while you would know your son was being looked after.

Also, Put it the other way. If your niece had got ill, and couldn't come, then how would you have dealt with that one?

Haven't read all he replies but I do wonder what up sister would have done if anything had happened whilst you were away and her DD needed medical treatment or repatriation? It doesn't bear thinking about.

On the other hand, maybe she was going to get insurance just before you left, it's a lot of money to lose for something not her fault.

Had your sister at least have an EHIC card for her child to travel with?

Even if your sister had taken out insurance would she have been able to claim? It would have been a policy for her and the issue is not related to her or a policy that just included her. I think you are being a bit unfair. Yes she should have got insurance but maybe she thought she wouldn’t have any issues. Stupid as you never know what will happen to you but kind of true. She hasn’t. Your son has. She couldn’t anticipate that.

I can’t believe you were about to go on holiday without checking that a young person in your charge had insurance

I doubt insurance would pay out in that situation so to offer some money would be fair.

My health insurance I use for travel is totally separate from any insurance I might buy (and I normally don't, but am happy to take that risk) to cover canceling. It wouldn't occur to me to ask for health insurance details for the DN until a day or two before the holiday.

Haven't RTFT but two things

1. Wasn't your sisters fault this happened BUT and this is a BIG BUT
2. Even if she DID take out insurance, I very much doubt it would have paid out in this scenario. Insurance companies are notorious for trying not to pay out. So imagine that she did take it out and they still didn't pay out then she would still be out £450. That's a lot of money. What would you do in that scenario? The company would probably say the person who broke their arm is not the person covered on their policy so probably won't cover the loss of £450.

from the gist of what I'm getting a lot of people on here are assuming her insurance would have covered your niece but that's not always the case and if I'm quite honest I would also go halves. She's your sister, that's your niece, is it worth breaking ties over £450?

So your sister has paid for a holiday that you have decided to cancel rather than have some of you go. That’s nuts. You should send your husband with the kids as otherwise everyone is missing out, including your niece.

I would pay half to keep your sister in your life tbh, life is too short and money isn't worth arguing over, if she doesn't accept that you've at least tried.
If I was organising something like this I honestly would have made sure everyone knew the position with insurance etc,

I believe OP has resolved this now and they are all happy with the solution

Read lots of this thread, but I keep coming back to the same thought which is “who doesn’t have travel insurance these days”?
We take quite a few of my daughters’ friends on holiday with us, both UK and abroad, and it wouldn’t cross my mind to check that they have insurance - it’s such a no-brainier to have travel insurance

Halves is a good compromise.

You agreed to take her and now you have withdrawn that offer and she has lost money because of it.

Of course you don't have to but it is unfair that you are not losing out by cancelling the holiday and they take all the hit for that.

Would none of you be going if you weren't insured? When you decided to cancel, you should be taking into account of their loss and offer to cover part of it.

Offering to take DN on holiday with you in October half-term at your expense is a nice gesture and should be compensation enough. I don't think your sister should expect you to pay her the £450, as she should have insured her daughter herself, as you insured your family. As you said, she is well travelled so she should have known to do that. Don't let her paint you as the 'baddie'!

Actually, thinking about it - if you book for travel by plane, you are required to confirm you have insurance. You don't have to take their insurance, but you have to tick a box that says you are covered. They don't bother if you are on a boat, as it's generally easier to get back.

" it is unfair that you are not losing out by cancelling the holiday and they take all the hit for that. "

The OP took the hit of paying for the insurance for her family, something the sister has not coughed up for. Why should the sister get the benefit of insurance when she hasn't paid for it or gone to the effort of even thinking about it, but the OP has? Why should the OP be more out of pocket when she has gone to the expense of paying for insurance?

Actually, thinking about it - if you book for travel by plane, you are required to confirm you have insurance. You don't have to take their insurance, but you have to tick a box that says you are covered. They don't bother if you are on a boat, as it's generally easier to get back.

I have never had to do this on airlines I've flown with or companies I've booked with (BA, EasyJet, Expedia etc) so I think this is wrong. What websites require this?

@shumpalumpa

I think I'm wrong. I thought insurance was mandatory, but it appears to be just strongly recommended. (found an example on Jet2)