To not pay my sister back?

[GunpowderGelatine]

We were meant to be going on holiday to Spain at the weekend with the four of us (me DH DD and DS) and also our teenage niece. My son now has to have surgery on his arm after breaking it a couple of weeks ago - it turns out the break was much worse than they first thought. So as a result we can't go on holiday 😢 before anyone asks I don't want to send DD and DN with one of us as I really don't think it would be an enjoyable holiday with half the people there and half the people here in hospital.

I've claimed on our insurance, which is all year round insurance I've had for donkeys years. We cannot claim for DN as she is not a member of our household. I told my sister this, thinking that she'd have sorted insurance. She hasn't, so they will lose £450. My sister thinks we should pay this back to them out of the holiday money that's coming back to us, but I've said sorry it can't be helped but she should have taken out insurance. We have now fallen out. WIBU? We want to rebook for October half term and could do without giving her £450 on top of this!

Inclined to agree with every word @KurriKurri has to say

OP, that's a good compromise.

Good result. It's a lesson for all of us - no one really had their eye on insuring DN. Also get your sis to check she has an EHIC card if relevant - it may not technically be your responsibility but it will very much become your problem if things go pearshaped while you're away.

Worth checking if the BF's bank account covers it all the same, unless I've missed an update on that.

can't really see why you can;t have one of you stay with your Ds and the other take the girls to Spain

He's 19 months old. Neither of us want to leave him, nor should we be made to feel we have to. I'm a bit that people see a holiday as being more important than tending to their baby.

My sister is happy with my October proposal. We have kissed and made up.

DN has calmed down after her apparently Kevin-style tantrum at the thought of not going on holiday this year

And above all - we have agreed that we will request DN is added to our insurance policy as soon as we book.

I love a happy ending

Paying for her holiday in October sounds good. Hopefully your sister sees it that way too.

Bemused by all the people suggesting that a family holiday should be broken up when there's another option. I wouldn't want to be away while my baby is having surgery or go away without my oh.

Just seen your latest post op. Glad all is well again.

GunpowderGelatine glad it’s sorted, all the best for your DSs op

A direct consequence of not having travel insurance is that you are usually responsible for all costs incurred. I'm asking you, since you think it's not OP's responsibility to ensure one of her party has insurance, who should be responsible for the cost of any medical treatment on holiday should DN need it? OP? The sister? The DN?

The costs associated with getting a child to adulthood are the responsibility of a child's parent, unless someone else has explicitly relieved them of responsibility.

I think this is a matter of miscommunication, and I can see why your sister is frustrated and I can understand her strop a little bit - she's down a lot of money and her DD is probably acting out - it's stressful. But she took far to passive a role in the booking of the holiday for her child and is now blaming you for not pointing out the things she should have asked questions about. She basically wanted you to provide the insurance she should have bought. She didn't pay for insurance, she didn't ask about it and she hasn't got it. But she wants the benefits of it now that something has gone wrong.

I think your compromise is a kind one and I'm glad your sister (and DN) is happy about it.

for you and your DH, I hope the surgery goes well and your DS recovers quickly.

Fact is when you book flights they always ask if you want insurance so I'm finding it difficult to understand why it didn't occur to OP to at least check with her sis.

I agree with this. I recently booked flights for me and my sister and asked if she wanted insurance.

OP, I imagine your DS assumed that insurance was covered. I think 50/50 would be reasonable.

I've booked plenty of flights for friends and family in the past but never once sorted out their insurance too. The level of cover and cost are so variable.

I should have read the whole thread. I'm glad you and your DSis have worked things out.

My ds was going on holiday with a friend. We paid for flights. The family had to pull out as dad had an accident. They gave us our money back. I presume they got it back on insurance as they said we claimed and here is your money back. Only now wondering if they just paid us.
Give her at least half as its your family who are cancelling although it can't be helped.
To be honest l don't know why ye were taking your dn as sounds like you don't like her or her mother very much.
Where is your family kindness?

Sorry hadn t read all the replies.

Fact is when you book flights they always ask if you want insurance so I'm finding it difficult to understand why it didn't occur to OP to at least check with her sis

They also ask for a passport. Should OP have checked with her sis that the child had a passport and offered to organise and pay for one if she didn't?

Are you 100% sure she isn't insured? If individuals are not named on the policy and you booked it and paid for it all together it may be classed aspart of the holiday costs as she would be part of the travel party. May be a long shot but if you haven't already double checked with them please do so

I'd give my sis the money back unless I was v.tight for money, my thinking being that it was you who cancelled it as one of you could have gone and one stayed at home with DS, cancelling the whole thing was your idea.

I know loads of people who leave their travel insurance until just before they go, not realising they should really take it out when the holiday is booked or shortly after so they are covered for any incident running up to the holiday that may prevent them going.

So I'm the sister was going to insure her dd in time for the holiday, sometime this week, but again if she had done so earlier her insurance may not have paid out. My intial reaction was don't pay but I think I would at least go half way.

So I think offering to bring dn in October is a great idea but I would also put her on your holiday insurance policy so as a PP said you are covered as a group.

I really don't know if your insurance will pay out. I was very ill and it didn't pay it (dicks).

It's not your sister's fault you decided to cancel, why should she be out of pocket ?

When you hand over money in advance for a holiday, there's a chance you may not get what you pay for. When that happens, you either suck it up, or reclaim it from travel insurance you may have that covers it.

(I've just checked our annual travel insurance, and if my DD had been the DN, she would have been covered, as the holiday was being cancelled due to an injury of someone she going to travel with, that wasn't known about at the time insurance was taken out.)

Glad all is sorted. Hope your sons op goes well and he’s back to running around soon

Glad things have worked out but did your year round existing travel insurance not cover the entire cost of the holiday for the whole party so including your niece ?

I have an annual policy through my bank account and before Mr Rolla and I went away for the first time if it mattered that we didn't live together/were married and was told no as we would travelling together on a single booking.

I phoned and asked did it matter pay attention Rolla

Have a lovely holiday.