To be disappointed about my holiday

[sadanddisappointed]

Name changed as so of the information I am about impart is very identifying.
My DP travels a lot he is senior management for a sport that is perceived to be very glamorous, he travels to every venue the sport appears at. In truth it is mostly airport, hotel, venue, hotel, venue, hotel, venue, airport. His mode of transport is perceived as glamorous it's not it's just long hours travelling.
The work is long hours, very intense and as he works for new owners of the sport there is a lot to prove. The last six weeks have been a particularly intense stint with only one day off.

Today he has had to travel to another European city for a meeting with their governing body. On the flight this morning his ear drum burst for the second time in 9 months, last time it was on the way to a South American city where the security risk is so great that the travel insurance decided the lowest risk option was to bring him home . Fortunately it was nearly the end of the season. He has been to hospital, but is now grounded so will be on the Eurostar home. He feels rubbish, but still has to do his meetings and then will come home.
His sport is on their summer break and we were due to fly off on holiday next Saturday for a week in Europe, obviously this will not happen now as he is grounded for six weeks ( work wise the first venues back are European so he will drive/train to them). He is devastated feels he has let the family down.
DD who is a teenager is acting like he deliberately did this to spite him, we had a holiday in France for 1 week before the season started.
I am via text trying to tell him he has not let the family down and trying to calm DD down that we will go away somewhere.
So far nobody has asked me how I feel. I work full time long hours in a job with on- call, it is my on business with multiple locations and many staff and has been fortunate to have grown 30% in the last year, but that has piled on the pressure to me both management wise and sheer volume of work out of hours. Whilst DP is away I bear the brunt of the teenage activities being a taxi, providing meals.
At this point in the year I am running on empty.
Don't get me wrong our situation is very fortunate we both earn well for the work we do and we are lucky. We had booked a week in a lovely villa in Tuscany, we were going to visit Florence, Pisa and Luca so of my bucket list places. I am coeliac and Italy is one of the best places in the world to visit as a coeliac as there is a really high incidence in Italians so eating out was going to be amazing.
We obviously can no longer fly, yes travel insurance will pay out, we will find somewhere to go ( anywhere as the dog has a booking into kennels and the cat sitter is booked). Yes better this week than next week and we have to travel home, but some difficult route.
My AIBU is to be disappointed to the point of wanting to cry, I had been so looking forward to this. At this moment in time MN is the only sympathetic ear I have.

I apologise for some really poor spelling and grammar.

I’m sorry. You’re not unreasonable to be disappointed. The overnight trains from Paris to Italy aren’t bad - would that be an option? Or he could do that and meet you there?

That’s really shit, for all of you.

Euro tunnel and somewhere hot in France?

Feel for you OP, it sounds like a horrible situation and everyone is loading onto you about it. Have an unmumsnetty hug.

I never knew Italy was good for gluten-free though, I've always avoided it thinking it would be horrendous. I'll start planning a trip!

Yanbu, I'd be disappointed too. Presumably you could still travel to France via ferry/eurostar and try and find something last minute?

(BTW, it's very obvious from your OP what sport your DP is involved in.)

Cruise out of Southampton?

Sorry to hear about your holiday plans: your poor DH must be feeling rubbish with his eardrum and the guilt about the holiday.

With the insurance paying out on the Tuscany holiday, does it mean you can afford a really luxurious break in the UK with some self-indulgent treats? The weather forecast isn’t too bad - granted, it won’t be Italy temperatures but it won’t be horrendous either.

And no, you are not BU to be disappointed!

I would be upset and would possibly cry out of frustration. It's no one's fault that your DH can't fly but you had a lovely holiday planned and needed a break.

I would actually try and find somewhere to go to but also gently explain why it's so important and would also take the opportunity to look at how you can make your life easier when he is away ie do you have a cleaner?

Have a cry and some chocolate/wine/bath. Explicitly tell your teenager you are upset and disappointed too but DH couldn’t do t on purpose (maybe give an example of a time she was ill and how no-one blamed her for this inconvenience but loved her and helped her get better!)

Get to bed early - it will hopefully all look and feel better in the morning. Big hugs x

Sweep beat me to it, yes last minute cruise no flight required

@Rachie1986 10% the Italian population is coeliac they screen all preteens for it, so just about every where caters for it.
@Xcisco I was aware of that hence the name change, my normal name is very different. It is impossible to describe his job in a non-outing way. After my moan I will quietly return to my regular name. He fortunately is a totally unsung senior management whose profile is so low only the real insiders know him.

I’d start looking into Mediterranean cruises!

I nearly had to cancel going on holiday a couple of weeks ago (dog sitter dumped us - I was going to have to wave everyone else goodbye). I was upset for about an hour then started planning. It all worked out ok. You can do this!

YANBU to be disappointed - I'm sure you all are!

Is the train an option?

If not, can you look for something in sourthern England - we have just had two great weeks in Cornwall - weather brilliant and lots to do.

Ireland? Get the ferry from holyhead?

I hope you get sorted

BTW, it's very obvious from your OP what sport your DP is involved in.

Not to me!

Although I am very ill-informed about sport...

I would still go. You and the kids fly as planned and he joins you by train. It is possible to get the overnight train to Italy.

Go! Go on the train, or drive. Or put the car in the train. There's no need to cancel your holiday.

You fly...
He can take a train...?? Not ideal but

I don't understand- it's in Europe. You and kids all fly, he gets train/hires a car. No need to cancel!

If you dh is going to Europe by train for work why can’t you? I did an overnight train trip to Florence pre Eurostar.

Going to echo Xcisco - it’s very obvious which sport he’s involved in to fans of that sport, and could prob even guess at the team with some of the info you’ve given.

But YNBU to be dissapointed. Could you go without him? If I were in his shoes, I’d be sick of all the travelling and wouldnt mind a week at home!

Alternatively as others have said, opportunies for train/eurostar/ferry? I’ve driven to Italy before, not as bad as you might think.

i wouldnt cancel, id look at trains, or the rest of the family fly and he join you on the train. Its only italy. You could drive it in 2 or 3 days

Not to me

Nor me. Haven't a clue.

I would also want to cry. How disappointing, especially if it's to places you have wanted to visit for a long time. I

don't know where in the UK you are but we frequently get the overnight ferry from Newcastle to Amsterdam. Friends who live there tell me the weather is roasting right now.

Sorry, I know all these people making helpful suggestions doesn't make you feel any better. It wouldn't make me feel any better either.

You have my sympathy. Our holiday went tits up this year (also for health reasons). I was so looking forward to a break, have been working crazy hours this year, felt utterly cheated when The Lovely Thing I was hanging on for disappeared. Plus kids upset just like yours. I really hope you get something else sorted and have a great break somehow. Apparently one day you will look back on this and laugh. Until then -

I’ve just found a Med cruise with P and O departing Southampton on 19th August, 14 nights from £1549 each. I’d do that! That’s just one cruise company and destination x

PS I could also guess the sport. It's totally obviously Quidditch.