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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be topless around the kids pool?

561 replies

WaitrosePigeon · 17/07/2018 16:23

Backstory...

On holiday at an all inclusive hotel with kids club etc. Got some tan lines from my bikini so this afternoon took the bikini top off to try and sort them out. DH comes over and says it is inappropriate near the kids pool. I said that he had his top off so why couldn’t I. He said because I was female.

I didn’t put the bikini top back on but is it inappropriate? It’s just boobs?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Timeisslippingaway · 18/07/2018 08:11

I still can't get over a PP saying they go for a bath and get changed in front of their kids friends. WTF!!! Do their parents know about this? 🤣.

I don't have a problem at all with people going topless in the appropriate places. Next to the kids pool I don't think is one of them.

I wouldn't do it because I have terrible boobs.

My kids would probably have a giggle if they say a woman with her boobs out as they wpuld if they saw someone with their arse hanging out or a man with his balls hanging out.

Alicatz66 · 18/07/2018 08:12

2up2manydown... I'm the owner of a pair of 30ff "knockers" as you put it .. I never have sunbathed topless as I'd be very self conscious and I'm happy in a bikini .... but I don't see why all of us big boobed ladies are referred to as having big "knockers" etc as if we are some sort of Carry On film extras !!!! .... most of us are quite self conscious in our bikinis not parading around showing off !!!! We were born 'this way !!!!

LakieLady · 18/07/2018 08:14

In Bognor Regis. Inappropriate. (Not sure why. It’s just not what we Brit’s do 😂)

I've seen plenty of women on East Sussex beaches sunbathing topless. Maybe West Sussex is more repressed? Grin

liverbird10 · 18/07/2018 08:43

GrinOh my word. The howling! The wringing of hands! Unbelievable Jeff.

socraties1234 · 18/07/2018 08:45

well, Ibiza says it all lots of 'ladies' go round with there breasts hanging out a bit like a cattle market. I wonder how your children will feel when they grow up and know mummy dearest was flashing her tits to all. But then again its Ibiza so no class at all.

Happypuppy · 18/07/2018 08:50

And it’s In the mail online.....

socraties1234 · 18/07/2018 08:51

I feel sorry for your poor husband/partner. Who would want to be with an expeditionist like you

SpiritedLondon · 18/07/2018 08:55

You’re going to have to help me out here , What’s an “ expeditionist” ? It sounds quite intrepid and exciting.

TooTrueToBeGood · 18/07/2018 08:58

Who would want to be with an expeditionist like you

It's only Ibiza, she's hardly Scott of the Antarctic.

geekone · 18/07/2018 08:58

The replies to this thread make me really sad. It just shows that the patriarchy is seriously ingrained into today’s society and women will always be blamed for the attitude of men, even by other women. Sad so sad.

It’s just boobs.

Wherismymind · 18/07/2018 08:59

I wonder how your children will feel when they grow up and know mummy dearest was flashing her tits to all.

My mum always went topless. She played with us on the beech and in the sea topless. It taught me to have body confidence and to not be ashamed of my body. It also taught me that their just boobs all women have them and they are no big deal.

liverbird10 · 18/07/2018 09:00

Winnie the Pooh used to go on "expetitions". Perhaps OP could lead a topless "expetition"...

SpiritedLondon · 18/07/2018 09:00

It’s not enough for some people to disagree and just say “ I wouldn’t do it” or “ I don’t approve of it” they have to make disparaging comments like Socraties who needs to do one quite frankly.

JacquesHammer · 18/07/2018 09:02

My young DC said - Mummy, that woman is so vulgar. Yes, darling, said I, vulgar is the right word

Cool sorry Grin

JacquesHammer · 18/07/2018 09:03

Who would want to be with an expeditionist like you

Where’s the OP taking an expedition to? Sounds exciting.

SpiritedLondon · 18/07/2018 09:03

I reckon expetitionist sounds awesome. I’m going to get mine out right now in celebration. Brace yourself London Waterloo

TooTrueToBeGood · 18/07/2018 09:04

Where’s the OP taking an expedition to?

The Paps of Jura possibly?

JacquesHammer · 18/07/2018 09:07

The Paps of Jura possibly?

Good thinking. Maybe Lake Titicaca?

Original poster
WaitrosePigeon · 18/07/2018 09:29

Some of these replies are really making me laugh. They’ve lifted my holiday blues that’s for sure!

The misogynism from other women on this thread is really really sad though.

LuckyAmy1986 - I’m sure it has been answered. I would follow other people’s lead. I never saw any other topless woman in the hotel pool topless so I didn’t either.

However, on the beach I was topless in the water because other women were. I judge each situation differently.

OP posts:
Original poster
WaitrosePigeon · 18/07/2018 09:29

Maybe Lake Titicaca?

LOL

OP posts:
NetballHoop · 18/07/2018 09:35

The Paps of Jura and Lake Titicaca are quite expensive to get to. I'd suggest starting with something a bit closer such as Nork Park.

www.google.com/maps/search/nork+park/@51.3195712,-0.2272027,17z/data=!3m1!4b1

LemonysSnicket · 18/07/2018 09:37

I wouldn't do it because I'm 23 and don't want to be leered at. But, I wouldn't be bothered if someone else was doing it

JacquesHammer · 18/07/2018 09:42

I suppose the obvious budget destination would be Bristol Grin

fuzzywuzzy · 18/07/2018 09:44

I breastfeed my thirteen month old and my only fear would be that she’d make a beeline for you and try and patch on.

She doesn’t discriminate tries to latch on to moobs too.

But that’s my problem and I’d try and keep her occupied.

It’s odd people get so upset about breasts, you’re on holiday at a pool/beach. Surely those who object shouldn’t be staring at you in the first place.

NotAnotherNoughtiesTune · 18/07/2018 09:50

I remember going into a sauna or steam room about 14/15 with my Dad. I had swimsuit on and he has trunks. It was in Greece I think and everyone else including a boy around my age was naked. Dad felt uncomfortable with it but I didn't - because nobody was gawping. The 14 year old boy was talking to his Mum I assume and Dad just like normal in there. Good for them I say.

It would take a long long time for this country to be like that. So although I wish very much men didn't sexualise women's breasts and it actually is their problem if they become aroused, I wouldn't like to risk unwanted attention, especially if I was alone. If I was on a quiet beach with a friend though or like I said upthread in my own garden, then I would though.

But I don't judge others for going topless men or women if it's not against the law where they are. If it is, then I think the law should be respected.