To be topless around the kids pool?

[WaitrosePigeon]

Backstory...

On holiday at an all inclusive hotel with kids club etc. Got some tan lines from my bikini so this afternoon took the bikini top off to try and sort them out. DH comes over and says it is inappropriate near the kids pool. I said that he had his top off so why couldn’t I. He said because I was female.

I didn’t put the bikini top back on but is it inappropriate? It’s just boobs?

I have rtft and asked my question twice but no answer!

What is your question? Anything deliberately obtuse obviously won’t get an answer.

If you were at a hotel where several women weren't wearing tops around the pool why was your husband complaining about you? Doesn't make sense if it was the 'done thing'.

To be honest feels like you just want the story to appear in a tabloid to show how 'prudish' Brit's are. Are you that desperate for 15 minuets of fame?

Do whatever you like. Why do you care about tan lines? If you had enough sun protection you'd be protecting yourself from getting skin cancer and avoiding the problem.

A tan is just damaged skin!!

obtuse ?
Inyho OP how do you define obtuse?
Is everything obtuse in your life if people don't agree with you?
That's another pure straight question.

I don’t see the problem but women are legally allowed to go topless in public when I am (as they should be).

i'm not a conservative person at all. but then I don't tnink it's right in that setting.

It just doesn't seem right to sunbathe topless in front of children. Why would you want random kids seeing your boobs, and you obviously didn't mind as you had them on show. It's a bit creepy.

On a beach it's expected. And you had been to a nudist beach so there was an area for you to use, but you chose in front of children. Yeah kids have used boobs for feeding, as babies. They don't have memories of that. Plus that's their mother, bit of a difference to seeing some stranger with barely any clothes on.

To be honest, I think you're just enjoying the attention this thread has brought too, so those saying it was attention seeking are probably right. To me, it's just wrong. Just because they allowed it there doesn't make it right. Other countries allow or ban other things, doesn't make them right either.

Are you that desperate for 15 minuets of fame? best comment

I agree with those saying that being topless is different for men and women, but I think the point is that it absolutely shouldn’t be.

The attention seeking comments are just nasty and a symptom of the misogynistic society we live in. Any woman challenging the ‘natural order’ entirely for herself is criticised. Why does it matter if no one else sees her lines if it makes her feel better? Why must it be for the benefit of someone else? Why can she just not prefer not wearing a top and that be the end of it?

All of the pearl clutching and ‘won’t someone think of the children!!!’ is just ridiculous. Do you actually speak to your dc? Just explain that woman have the right to behave in exactly the same way as men and if it bothers them it is their issue and they must deal with it. Women are under no obligation to police their behaviour to appease the feelings of others. And comparing collecting the children from school or going to the supermarket to sunbathing... utterly ridiculous comparison. I certainly wouldn’t expect dh to do either sans top.

My dd (young so has a bit of an excuse) can be somewhat scathing about the clothing choices (or lack of) of others, which I find surprising considering she is very conscious of equality, so we have lots of talks about respecting personal choice and not judging other women for their decisions. I sincerely hope it sinks in because I would be mortified if I ever heard her carry on like this.

I've not seen any topless ladies around be the pool for any of the holidays we've been abroad as a family (3). There has been some on the beach. Ds (10) has seen mine many times but is now embarrassed if he catches me changing and scarpers. I'm sure he'll grow out of it but he wouldn't be the only
pre-teen feeling like that I'm sure. So I'd say ywbu.

Topless by the beach Is fine. Topless by a kids pool - not so much.

^^ that is an absolutely disgusting way to talk about anyone. What is wrong with you?

I judge toplessness and if I’m going to do it by what the other holiday makers are doing.

If others are topless then I will. If I’m going to be the only one then I won’t.

Mainland Europe have a much healthier attitude about breast than us Brits. As proven by some of the replies on here.

Generally when we’re away I find if it’s mainly Brits there aren’t many (if any) boobs out but as soon as I get to the public European beach it’s boobs everywhere.

Phone cant see who youre referring to?

Totally inappropriate and makes some people especially men uncomfortable. Lack of respect to others I feel.

I hate People that do this around the pool.

I just want to know if you would also go in the pool or walk around topless and if not why not. Because your reasoning and a lot of others on here was that if men can do it so can you and presumably they are doing that! Not trying to be goady I am genuinely intrigued. I have never seen a grown woman topless in the pool by holiday that I can recall.

DH wouldn't be uncomfortable by someone being topless by the pool. He'd just roll his eyes and think it was a bit unnecessary and go back to reading his book.

Inappropriate sorry. Why would you even want to be topless when other people's children are around when you could just wear a top?

Topless at a beach where it's accepted, not a problem. It's just boobs.

That said, I think topless sunbathing near a children's pool is a bit odd.

Now I think about it, I've not really seen many women topless around pools on holiday.

If the argument is 'it's fine because it's just boobs and I'll never see these people again', I would assume the OP would go to a beach on the south coast of England and go sans top.

I think it depends why country you're in as to whether or not it's acceptable. France - fine. It's pretty common for women to go topless. Turkey - not fine as it would be offensive to the locals

Put your tts away ffs and stop flashing other people’s kids

Oh dear Lord, best comment yet 😂😂😂
This thread is actually quite depressing. People being 'upset' at a woman lying down with no top in, women expected yet again to stop doing a perfectly harmless task because of these mythical upset people/children/rapists hovering about. Any woman not despising and hiding her body is an 'attention seeker' or 'fame hungry'.

Never underestimate the power of internalised misogyny.

BTW zsazsa why are you saying t*ts and not tits?

TITS
TITS
TITS

I haven't read the whole thread but one of my holiday memories is when a rather ample German lady topless jogged past dd with her breasts waving freely on a Spanish beach and then jogged past again on the way back.

Dd just stated open mouthed the first time and then said loudly declared that the lady had her jiggly boobs out. The German lady thought it was hilarious.