Aibu or is school, regarding discipline?

[Imustbemad00]

Would like any information anyone can give me regarding secondary schools and discipline procedures.
My child’s secondary school is strict. I knew it was strict, partly why I chose it. However, in reality, it is causing so many problems. My child has changed so much since starting there, unhappy, suffering with mental health and has developed a bad attitude problem and I will admit is being quite naughty at school and at home. Im worried.

This brings me on to the school rules and discipline. The school penalises children for looking out of a window, or anything viewed as a drop in concentration or messing around. Even dropping a pen. They have to move through the corridors in silence and not make eye contact with anyone and can’t even mess about at break time. They have to sit and chat and be sensible. It’s like they can not have personalities.

The sanctions for bad behaviour are extreme. My child has spent a lot of time in isolation, which means out of lessons. Not learning. Not talking to another person all day. Not great for a child already struggling with mental health.

The school also give them double detentions, meaning my child is was in school for 9 hours and 45mins today without talking to another child or being in any lessons, arriving home at 6.30pm.

I try to work with them as I know my child’s behaviour is the cause of punishments, but honestly feel they are way over the top and their approach is making things worse. They say that those are their policies and that is that.

I’m thinking of moving schools but worry my child’s behaviour could worsen if boundriers were relaxed. But equally they could flourish if not so unhappy and stressed.

So Aibu to think the schools policies are over the top? Is it normal?

No

Did you know the policies before he started?
The rules seem extreme but I imagine they're in place for a reason

It's not a school, it's a prison. Change schools before it causes more damage.

Not a normal that I'd like to see or be sending my child into.

I'm all for discipline but not making eye contact in the corridor and not ever looking out of a window is ridiculous and setting lots of them up for failure. I'm an adult, I've got very very good qualifications and have worked in demanding environments but I think I'd have mental health issues if I had to exist in that environment. Some kids in secondary school are still 11. They have energy then need to expend - that's what break time is for. It's also almost impossible to maintain 100% concentration for an entire hour without once glancing out of the window.

Those conditions are unhealthy in the extreme.

This seems hideous and extreme, and like a prison.
Discipline and punish bad behaviour, ok - this seems way ott, kids can't play at break time? Wtf?

I believe in some level of discipline but that level is crazy. It’s obviously not doing much good for your child’s mental health.

I think you need to find an alternative school.

That sounds awful. I work in education and would hate to work in or send my child somewhere like that. It seems to be at best misguided and at worst damaging and discriminatory. Are there any other local schools you could look at?

As a secondary school teacher, much of this seems unfeasable. With the huge push from the government on mental health in schools, I fail to see how they can maintain it.

You mention your child’s mental
Health? Is the DSL in the school aware?

Honestly, I’d move him bloody pronto. These years matter so much. So, so much.

Is that a state school in the U.K.?

It doesn’t sound legal to me

Move your child. She/he is not learning in a healthy environment. To be that stifled is detrimental to their learning. Schools need to have firm boundaries but what your child is experiencing sounds bloody awful.

Michela school. Sounds utterly bonkers to me, heaven knows why parents would choose such a school in the first place. Yes, move him.

YANBU. İm all about discipline but
That's not discipline. That's control

I'd move him. Teens needs to be nurtured with boundries not sent to prison incampment

Is it Michaela?

If so, you should move. Not because it’s a draconian school - I’ve seen it in action, they’re strict but fair - but because you obviously don’t like it and they’re not going to change, so you need to find somewhere more in keeping with your own philosophy.

Your sons behaviour is getting worse. There's your answer.
I think I would rebel against those rules too tbh!

This can't be a uk state school, surely??

What the hell?! And you chose this school yourself... Knowing this?!

Is your daughter/son wanting to move school OP? Have you had a conversation about it? Or are they resigned to thinking that this is their school experience?

It's not a discipline framework I would choose to send my children to or to work within. (And I'm not entirely sure how much help it is people speculating on the school when the OP has kept that out of it)

That said, the school is offering a certain type of education. You knew that when you signed up to it. If the ethos of the school doesn't match your child then you'd be more than within your rights to move your child.

Why would you choose a school like this?

Sceptics amongst you need to go to Michaela and see it begore you judge. I don’t work there, but I am a teacher. It’s inspiring and the children are happy and proud. There’s no bullying and their results are phenomenal. If I lived in London I’d love to work there.

This sounds like a prison, not a school - not an environment I would send a child into

Is it an ARK academy school? It sounds completely bonkers and unnatural. I'd move him!

Sounds like science fiction - an academy turning children into emotionless robots. I'm surprised parents want to send their children there. Is there any pastoral care?
Climbing the academic ladder isn't everything. Turning out well rounded individuals is important too, not pressing them all into the same rigid mould. No wonder so many young people today have MH issues.