AIBU to feel upset (and a little bit shit) at being told I’m “dangerously overweight”

[Mightymelon]

Today I’ve been told I’m at risk of obesity and I’m “really quite overweight” and “dangerously overweight” and I’m absolutely gutted.
I’ve had a hideous year and I know I have put on weight but the mentions of “dangerously overweight” and “obesity” have really shaken me up.
I’m 10st 12 and a size 10 (occasionally an 8 in generous shops like Gap and Next) from 9st 6 with similar sized clothes but leaning more to an 8, this time last year ( this was pre pregnancy and tbh I was trying to get down to 9), . but over the last year I’ve carried a pregnancy to almost 20w, become quite unwell and lost said pregnancy, been depressed as a result of aforementioned loss, moved house (quite a significant move), has an awful arthritis episode that was prolonged And therefore stopped me excersising and started a new full time teaching role that has had me on my knees.
I’ve recently re joined the gym am eating much much better and have lost 3LBs so was feeling quite good.

I’m not sure what I wanted from this post but i just wanted a handhold because it all really shook me up and whilst I knew I was much plumper than before I didn’t really get the magnitude of my weight gain.
I don’t need flaming or anything but I just was so shocked and confused because I didn’t think you could be so dangerously overweight at a 8/10/12 and wondered if any of the MN massive could cheer me up or share their weight loss stories!

Thanks

Who told you that op?

Hi Op, really sorry to hear of your troubles. Can I ask who told you you’re ‘dangerously overweight’? Because honestly, you sound absolutely fine unless there are other issues going on...

How tall are you OP? Unless you are very short, I cannot see how you can be dangerously overweight at your current weight.

Sorry to hear all this op .

If a doctor told you this, do you mind me asking your bmi? Maybe you’re very lean but heavy, so the doctor thinks you’re very overweight when you are not.

How tall are you ?

If you're 4' 2" then yes you are in need of remedial action, if you're 6' 2" you're a bit on the skinny side.

The weight and dress size you quote does not sound anywhere near “dangerously overweight”! I’m guessing it wasn’t a healthcare professional who told you this?

That seems really harsh - I went for my checkup and was about 1lb off obese for the BMI and all the nurse said was “at least your not obese” I’m a 14 so you must be slimmer than me - sounds like they were going for a shock without thinking of the mental effects. It cruel - have some and just think of the fact that you are currently moving in the right direction

A doctor told you you are dangerously overweight?

Unless you are only 4ft tall, that sounds an ok weight to me. I would hardly describe you as dangerously overweight at a size 10.

I’m really sorry for your loss OP.

What’s your height?

I’m 5ft 9 and went from around 10st 6 to 11st 13 and it really is a lot of weight to put on, due to my height I was on the upper edge of healthy BMI but anymore and I’d have been overweight. So I imagine if you’re a few inches shorter than me you might well be overweight. Shop sizing is deceptive and it’s easy to look at it as a reassurance (‘I’m still only a 12’) while ignoring the scales cos it feels nicer to believe we’re slimmer than we are. But I can be 16 in one shop and (I kid you not, on one occasion) a 4 in another (😂) depending on the fit so it’s truly meaningless.

Have you figured out your BMI? Being overweight is the norm in England now so it’s easy to look around and think ‘oh I’m still slim’ compared to everyone else when you’re actually overweight.

I’m sorry you’re feeling shit 💛 did you realise you were significantly overweight before this? Who said it? Do you have any plans to do anything about it or are you happy as you are?

I wouldn't have thought you could be 'dangerously overweight' at a size 10/at 10st 12lbs either. A bit overweight? Yes, possibly, depending on height, but dangerously? I wouldn't have thought so. Who was it that told you you were? A doctor?

Who had told you that?

Sorry you’ve had such a difficult year

Another one wondering who told you that.

Sounds OTT IMHO.

Nope at a size 10 at 10st 12 there is no way you are DANGEROUSLY overweight.

I’m 5ft 4 & 11st, I am overweight (not dangerously) and am a size 14! No idea who told you this but it doesn’t compute?

Oh come off it. If you're a size 10, how on earth can you be dangerously overweight? Just look in your mirror and use your brain.

How can you be overwheight at a size 8-10? That's ridiculous! I don't know who said it but someone's winding you up!

Who said this to you OP? And how tall are you?

If you fit in size 10 clothing and are 10 stone 12, you are not 'dangerously overweight' unless you are very short.
At my height (5ft 4) 11 stone would be a chubby size 12 but certainly not on the cusp of obesity!

Practice nurse @garden

Crucial point who actually said that?

I was your weight and size 12 (14 in some shops) but I’m only 5’2”, last year. I was overweight but no one ever said it was ‘dangerously’ so. Well done on the 3lb loss and joining the gym.

Is this in japan or something? Because it isnt in the uk!

Practice nurse is a numpty.

How tall are you?

Depending on your height you could be overweight but can't imagine it's dangerous category.
Anthing over 10 st 2 lbs puts me overweight and I'm currently 12 stone. Would love to get back to 10 St 9!

If I was 10 st 12 and a size 10, and someone told me I was dangerously overweight, I would assume they were taking the piss.

So who said this then @Mightmelon ?