Horrid texts about me on MILs phone, should I say something

[Raspberryberetthekindyoufind]

DH, DS (five) are on holiday abroad with inlaws and I have no signal on my phone so I borrowed MILs phone to ring my mum as it’s her birthday today. As I was about to make the phone call a message from SIL (we hate each other) came through saying “I am glad the stupid bitch is not spoiling it this year for you all”
So wanting to know what this was about I did check MILs messages only to find many messages to SIL saying “thank gods the fits have “stayed away” this year” and “the lazy cow is pulling her weight this year” then messages back from SIL saying “it’s his fault he knew when he marriages her she had them” and “don’t know how he puts up with her”
Back story last year we went away and I had quite a few seizures (I am epileptic) and for two days I was completely floored and was told by DH to either sleep inside or just stay on the sunbed. I did have about five other seizures which knocked me out for a hour or so.
There is also a message on the phone to MILs best friend saying the same things she has messaged to SIL with best friend replying back “glad your holiday is not ruined this year”
I just feel like shit now and dont know what to do. If the message had not popped up from SIL I would never have checked MILs phone. I don’t know what to do I felt so guilty last year and MIL and FIL kept saying “it’s ok” and “don’t worry you cant help it”.
I now know MIL was prob slagging me off to all in sundry about her wrecked holiday. I know for a fact DH stayed with them the whole time last year with DS and left them in peace by the pool one of the days I was out of it and took DS to the beach
Feel like total shit I don’t know if I should say something now, tell DH, wait till we get home or just leave it

Tell dh
What a pair of witches.

Far out, that is some shitty in-laws you have OP.

How much longer are you out there together? Can you quietly tell DH and then never ever waste your time with them again?

Tough one! I know people will come on and say you shouldn't snoop, and what you won't have seen won't have hurt you etc but I'd be hurt/mad in your position OP.

Do you usually have a good relationship with your MIL usually? I'm guessing so if you all holiday together? What's your DH relationship like with her?

If it was me I'd probably tell my DH. I know he'd bring it up with her and then support me in the resulting argument but even if he didn't want to speak to her about it I know I'd feel better for sharing it with him.

Regardless, I probably wouldn't go on holiday with her again though.

You should of called your DH over and shown him. No more holidays with the IL's I think!! Twat.

Ouch.
No good ever comes eh?

Make this the last time you do anything width mil, she's nasty.

Tell DH now. If my mum did that to my spouse, I would be packing up and leaving. Making it very clear that their cruelty and rudeness has ruined this holiday.

I would never be going away with them again and telling your DH exactly why. What an awful thing to be bitching about you for!

I honestly would never ever have dreamt of snooping until the text from SIL came through
I have never got on with SIL but always though MIL was ok, we have never been close but always got on. I suppose at least I know now

How awful for you. Your relationship with your PIL is unfortunately not as good as you thought it was. I would have shown my DH the texts so I had proof but would leave the blow up till I got home-and would NEVER go on holiday with them again!

The message from SIL came up on the screen as I went to dial and then yes I did snoop

Bloody hell you poor thing. Tell your DH and when you hand the phone back to MIL, say a message from SIL popped up. What a bitch.

Tell your MIL once you get home you read the message you are hurt and since she feels this way you will stay out of her way...
Then say nothing else.
Let your husband visit with your children and enjoy your time alone, also don't go on holiday with her anymore.
If you can't face telling send her a text.

Agree with above posters, I would absolutely tell your DH and see what he wants to do about it. I wouldn’t be going on holiday with them again.

Tell dh. Make the most of the holiday - go off with dh and do your own things. When you get home spill the beans and fuck them off.

You should not have checked her phone regardless. I think I will be in the minority here but I believe we are all entitled to our own private thoughts (we may share them with people we trust) you had no right to snoop in her private messages. I often have wicked thoughts about those I love most in the world, I am only human. I don’t share these thoughts with them because they are fleeting and allow me to offload safely without it becoming a huge issue.

I'd tell my husband if it were me. It's one thing having a private moan but that 'stayed away' tells me she doesn't take your illness seriously. Even if you decided not to confront MIL you've not had to deal with it on your own.

How long left on holiday with them?

I'd be inclined to keep quiet about it for the sake of keeping the peace on holiday.

I'd then let DH talk to her about it when you get home, I would go NC or low contact and definitely no more holidays together.

I wouldn't confront her myself at all, let it all happen through DH.

I'm so sorry, nobody deserves to be treated like this, she is obviously a nasty person (and raised a nasty daughter too)

Vile pair of hags.

I think that what you do depends on how long you have left and what the implications would be if there is a greater fall out.

But you should definitely tell DH by the time you get home.

I'm sorry you're going through this, it's really not your fault and she sounds truly awful.

Definitely tell your husband. How long until you come home?

I agree with the poster saying a phone is a private thing and I would never have looked if the message had not come up in all its glory on the screen and then I know it’s weak but I had to look at what else had been said.

We are here for three more days

Having epilepsy is not a valid reason for them to claim you ruined their holiday. That's not on. It's tricky in knowing how to handle it without rocking the boat as they are clearly an unsympathetic lot who appear to not want to understand your condition.

Maybe suggest to DH that you start taking holidays without them. If they want an explanation, just say something along the lines of 'my condition means that it could impact your holiday and I really only want you to have a nice time' . Hopefully that may suggest to them you've found out about their horrible messages but that you're not stooping to their level - I'm sure you'll have a much nicer time without them tbh.

I agree you need to tell your DH. I mean, you'll surely not be able to relax around your mail or sil after this (I couldn't, at least) so however awkward for you, I think you need to explain.

I’d go no contact with MIL if I was in your position.