DH has invited MIL to come on our holiday!!

[MeMeMeow85]

For some reason DH decided to invite his mother to come on our holiday to Disneyworld next year!! I’m really annoyed!

He just announced “Great, mum’s said she’ll come with us to Orlando” as if that’s a really wonderful thing!!!! Apparently it’s such a good idea, as she will “be a great help with the DC” 🙄

DC1 will be 4 and DC2 will be 18 months. In no way will MIL want to be the designated babysitter, as she will see the trip as her holiday too...yet we would have to pay for everything, as she’s retired and doesn’t have much in the way of savings.

I really don’t want to pay for a second hotel room at Disney or change our plans to somewhere less expensive! I also want it to be special time for our little family without having to take another person’s wishes into account every day...

DH is an only child and she’s been on her own for over 30 years, so I know he wants to be inclusive, but she needs entertaining, she won’t do anything by herself to give us some space and I’m the one who will end up engaging with her the whole time (when she comes to stay every month, DH is usually at work or if he’s at home, he’s in the study or garden). I have to listen to her witter away about nonsense all evening when I really just want to be quiet and zone out after the little ones are asleep. Also, she complains a lot about a lot of inane things and has strong opinions about subjects she doesn’t know much about!!

Am I being unreasonable to insist that he backtracks somehow on the invite??

I should add that she’s kind and thoughtful and DC1 adores her... she would be really upset if she knew she was unwelcome. Maybe we should cancel the holiday and wait till the following year (2020) when she might forget the invite and we can go just the 4 of us??!

All those saying 18 months and 4 is too young for Disney World are, in my personal opinion, wrong

what is an 18m old baby going to get out of a holiday in DW?

what is an 18m old baby going to get out of a holiday in DW?

But many people do take children on holidays and to other places for days out, etc. Why do anything for an 18 month old in that case?

FWIW we took dd to DLP at 18 months. She loved the rides she went on and was besotted with meeting some of the characters. She enjoyed the parade and fireworks. So much so we took her to WDW six months later

But many people do take children on holidays and to other places for days out, etc. Why do anything for an 18 month old in that case?

18m olds are usually just along for the ride, you dont pretend your holiday in Tuscany is particularly for the baby.

go to Disneyland Paris - it is genuinely the same. I have been to all 3 (Florida, Paris & California) and was very impressed what a good job they have done at Paris.

It really isn't the same IMO. Been to all three of those and hoping to add more next year, been to DLP a few times, WDW more. You get the same kind of magic at them but DLO doesn't have the same feel ime. It's not as big, it's not quite as magical, and the customer service is definitely not the same.

UserV Why is utter rot to think it's easier with another pair of hands in somewhere like DW?

i think it all depends on the MIL .i go on holiday with my son and family they invite me get on good with dil .but i take the kids at night to let parents have some adult time .they can rely on me at anytime for babysitting no problem some days they have family time i go do my own thing no problem we discuss the night before tommorows plan .but it only works if everyone happy if your mil not the type to pitch in then i would say no dont go there

I think WDW is totally doable with children of your age OP. sounds like you want to stay at a Disney hotel/resort and you should be looking for things like free dine plans to save money & consider things like would you need car hire when you can you all the Disney transportation for free and use Uber for the odd trip elsewhere. At 18 months you won't need a park ticket for your youngest either. If you could get past your DH inviting MIL these are all considerations that might help with the affordability. However I wouldn't have wanted anyone else with us the first time we went, doing all the big things for the first time was special but it's also a lot to get your head around without having the extra worry of someone else's wants, needs, expectations. I know my own mum and also mil wouldn't have coped with the heat, the amount of walking, lengths of queues, not to mention not being keen on a lot of the rides, and the eye rolls at families in matching shirts, grown ups in Mickey ears etc would have been constant.

Not a fucking chance. Been there done that, didn't end well....

MiggeldyHiggins

what is an 18m old baby going to get out of a holiday in DW?

Well my 18 month old twins love bright colours and music so “It’s a Small World” would be super fun for them (as well as Dumbo and Country Bear Jamboree and Carosel of Progress and..... etc etc); they love playing in water fountains (if we ever get the weather for it) so the water play areas at Magic Kingdom and Epcot and Disney Springs and pools at the villa would be super fun and they could play in them every day while on holiday.
The characters would be fun for them to interact with- they love Tigger and Stitch so I would imagine they would be excited to meet them like many of the kids I’ve seen at Disney World who enjoy character meets. It would be lovely to see them with big smiles on their faces having big hugs from the characters and I could take pictures to help me remember those moments forever.

They love seeing animals so the animal trails at Animal Kingdom and the “petting zoo” area would be fun for them and they would be super enthusiastic about the Safari.

I mean I could go on and on and on and list most components of the Parks and explain how my 18 month old twins would enjoy WDW as a holiday destination but that’s just my family- you may decide it’s not for your family and that’s absolutely fine- one less family in front of me in the queue for Small World!

TBH I think there should be two separate threads here - one with the appropriateness or otherwise of taking young kids to Disney and the second the actual problem in hand of the OP DH asking the MIL

i agree about dlp not being the same-the atmosphere is completely different

i wuldnt take kids that young but you know them better than us

will mil be able to cope with the heat and all the walking you have to do there-it might work out if she watched the dc whilst you and dh go on rides apart from that i doubt she would have much to do unless theme parks are her thing

Have been on holidays / weekends away with the PILs but only when discussed at length before hand and agreed together and certainly wouldn’t be happy with it just being sprung on me.